La danse avec le diable
by Kai Cross
Summary: Ciel manages to escape from the occult but after being found on the streets of London, badly injured and traumatized, he's forcibly taken to the Asylum. He is subjected to many cruel Victorian treatments and abuse, aiming to cure his confusion but only working to shatter his mind even more. It seems that his only hope is to wait for salvation from Heaven... Or Hell? Ciel/Sebastian
1. Prologue

_AU: Hello! I'm Kai and this is the prologue to my story called "La danse avec le diable", which means "Dance with the devil" in French. Some themes are inspired by "American Mcgee's Alice" game but it's not an actual crossover. As you're probably aware, it's a Kuroshitsuji (Black Butler) fanfic. I hope you will enjoy reading it. I would also really appreciate if you could leave me some feedback, good or bad :)_

_I would like to thank Shattered Apocalypse for being a wonderful Beta and fixing all my mistakes! You can find her here - u/2349055/Shattered_Apocalypse as she's also a writer._

_WARNINGS (to the whole story): violence, gore, profanity, psychological, physical and sexual (rape and molestation) abuse, sexual content_

* * *

He was the only one left now. After witnessing so many deaths of other children, he had a very clear idea how exactly he was going to die. He knew who would deliver the killing blow. He knew when would this happen. And he knew how his blood would look on the sacrificial altar.

At first, there was only pure fear, born out of horror scenes and wrenching screams. Now, resignation was the only emotion. There was no point in thinking about anything anymore. There was no future, no plans, and most certainly: no chance of leaving the place alive. Accepting the fate was the only thing that could be done… But, ironically, a part of him he didn't know he possessed refused to believe that, still desperately clinging to life, trying to sense hope with every beat of his fluttering heart.

The unexpected happened a night before his destined death. It was very simple; one could laugh at it, if having enough sense of humor. One of the younger occult members forgot to lock the cage after bringing him water.

And he could do nothing else, except to use this chance. Of course, at first he thought it was a trick, some new twisted game they came up with. Only when he was finally outside, able to take a breath of fresh air, not dirtied with the stench of blood and _them, _he understood what really just happened.

Then he ran. Straight into another hell.


	2. Chapter 1

_AU: Firstly, I would like to thank Snow Whites Poison Kiss for her kindness and hard work as a Beta on this chapter :)_

_In addition, I want to thank Shattered Apocalypse for becoming my full time Beta. She has also worked on this chapter, fixing all my sneaky errors, which went unnoticed._

_Hope everyone will enjoy reading the first chapter of "La danse avec le diable". All comments are welcomed._

* * *

PATIENT'S FIRST NAME: Real name unknown though patient claims to be named "Ciel"

PATIENT'S SURNAME: N/A

FAMILY DETAILS: N/A

PSYCHIATRIST IN CHARGE: Dr. Dosett

D.O.B: December 14th 1875

ADMISSION DATE: January 29th 1887

AGE: 12

NUMBER: 073

BACKGROUND: Unknown. Signs of mistreatment and physical abuse; patient still has a brand burnt on his body as evidence. Required hospitalization.

PHYSICAL HEALTH: No disabilities, underweight, severely malnourished, suffers from asthma, low immune system.

DESCRIPTION: A high-risk patient. Delusional, frequently hallucinates and suffers from psychosis, needs to be restrained most of the time. Signs of self-mutilation; however, the patient does not admit to do so. Extremely emotionally unstable. Problems with aggression. Food refusal very common – force-feeding is often required. Suffers from nightmares, causing him to regress to childlike behavior – patient sometimes wets the bed. In addition, very paranoid. Very introverted. Most of the time impossible to communicate with. Unable to perform basic tasks concerned with taking care of oneself, like bathing, brushing his hair, and dressing.

Even though the patient was admitted 2 years ago, he has made no progress so far. Treatments are continuously being administered.

VERY LOW CHANCE OF BEING RELEASED

* * *

"Can you hear me, Ciel?"

He never let go of it. Not even when he was in the cage, with _them_ all around him. _They _let him keep it for one, unimportant reason. They found it quite amusing.

His palm was desperately clenching a dirty, dark colored toy – a stuffed rabbit doll with a missing eye and a barely distinguishable, blurry tag saying "_Funtom Co__"_. The only thing that survived… _The Fire._ He wanted to hug it closely, but he couldn't. He wasn't even trying anymore. It would be a futile attempt, as it was impossible to move.

"Ciel, look this way."

He lay on the plain bed without any covers, almost immobilized as old looking, full of scratches, brown leather straps over his body restrained his movement to the minimum.

"Ciel." A voice, firm, but totally void of emotions tried to bring him back to reality for a third time. "Look at me, Ciel, if you can understand what am I saying to you."

Complete lack of reaction was the only response. Large blue eyes, partially hidden by a fringe, were unfocused and hazy, almost as if in a dream state. There were dark shadows under them, indicating both tiredness and lack of sleep. Messy, tangled grey locks with a bluish tint were dull, completely lacking luster. The boy's skin looked unhealthy, with its unnaturally sickish pale tone. His cheek bones seemed a bit too much prominent, his whole body too thin, and anyone could easily notice this, for the boy only wore a white, oversized patient's gown.

"Why did you refuse to eat, and then spat at the nurse again when she tried to feed you, Ciel?" Same monotone voice, perhaps a little bit louder now.

He wasn't listening to the voice. How long had it been? He stopped listening to them a long time ago. It was better this way. At first, on the same day he was brought there, he _tried_ to communicate with them. Explain things to them. He told them what happened. He told them his real name. But they just didn't want to _hear it_. No, they didn't call him a liar for claiming to be Phantomhive's son. They didn't believe him when he said that his parents' murderers where the ones who harmed him. They called him _delusional_. And they believed that he was a worthless, mad orphan brought here from the streets of London.

"You will be force fed every time from now on, due to this. No more chances. Do you understand, Ciel?"

It was so cold and ugly. _Everything_. The dusty walls and the ceiling, which were certainly painted white years ago, now had a color of dirt. There were many spider webs in the corners, and he absolutely loathed them. The floor was damaged, filled with cracks and the dark, long, dried spots that were certainly stains of blood contrasted with the light shade of old tiles. Making it even sicker. Disgusting. Sometimes he had problems distinguishing what was the floor and what was the ceiling, what was up and what was down.

Dr. Dosett sighed and stood up, his palm automatically brushing the strands of his short, dark blond hair. The chair made an unpleasant screeching noise, but the boy didn't even flinch.

"I will tell Hawk and Ray to escort you in a few minutes."

That did it. He could ignore anything but that. As soon as he heard it, the boy couldn't suppress a reaction. Suddenly, his eyes seemed much more focused; his body went rigid. It did not go unnoticed.

"You will undergo hydrotherapy today," added the psychiatrist, keeping his gaze on the boy for a few seconds longer, before turning around, ready to walk out.

_Ohgodno. No, no, no._

"No," Ciel whimpered brokenly, almost inaudibly, before he could stop himself.

Dr. Dosett glanced at him again, interest clearly reflected in his eyes. There was a hint of self-satisfaction in his facial expression, as if he was proud of himself that he finally managed to get a response out of the patient.

"No?" he repeated. "Why not, Ciel? Can you tell me?"

He moved closer to the boy, almost hovering over him. His hand touched Ciel's chin, firmly, but not too roughly, forcing the boy to look at him.

"It… It doesn't h-help," whispered Ciel, his breath quickly becoming erratic, anxiety clearly written all over his face. "And they… they… M-me," he stuttered brokenly.

Tears immediately filled his eyes before he could even try to finish the sentence. He knew he _wouldn't_. It was just too…

"They what, Ciel?" probed the psychiatrist, his gaze never leaving the boy. Observing. That was the word which perfectly described it. As if he was some experiment, some specimen to analyze. The grasp on his chin became stronger.

"Touched," muttered the patient too quietly for him to hear, tears finally trailing his pale cheeks, wetting the skin and finally the hard, uncomfortable mattress. "D-don't touch me," he growled suddenly, trying to get up. Restraints stopped him immediately. He jerked his head to the side violently, trying to escape the hand.

"You need to calm down, Ciel or else you will have another attack," said the psychiatrist, finally withdrawing his palm.

"Shut up!" screamed the boy. Lately, his self-control was becoming worse and worse. Everything was getting to him. Maybe he was here for too long. Maybe he was finally going mad. Like all of them here. "How dare you? How dare you all?" he couldn't stop yelling. Not that he wanted to. He knew he was on the edge. He knew he would snap again, like the last time… And the time before… It was only a matter of time.

"Ciel, you know this is no way to talk to your…"

The boy did not let him finish. Fresh tears, this time mostly out of anger, streamed down his face. "You will all pay for what you did to me," he hissed, voice filled with apostle hate and venom. "Sadists, every single one of you will hang!" he choked, his breathing getting a bit more difficult. He could feel nothing but anger now. For making him hurt, for breaking him, for strapping him down of dignity and for making him cry even though he promised himself to never cry again.

"I need to go see other patients now, Ciel. I will send Ray and Hawk right away. Try to calm down in the meantime," said Doctor Dosett in a collected voice. Of course, the first rule was to never argue with patients, and he was not planning on breaking it. It would be simply pointless. The boy was mentally ill and wouldn't understand his arguments. "Since you have been very apathetic and lethargic most of the time lately, today it will be cold water," he added, referring to the hydrotherapy.

His remark was ignored, or maybe unheard. It was impossible to tell, but patient acted as if he hadn't heard him at all.

"I am Earl Ciel Phantomhive and Queen's Watchdog! I'm not mad and you are fully aware of it! I know what you are trying to do, they told you to drive me insane, I know it's _them_!" the boy was openly sobbing now. He was getting overly emotional lately, and it embarrassed him. He wanted to cover his face with hands but he _couldn't. _Instead_, _he just tilted his head to the side, trying to hide it – his shame, his tears – in a mattress.

When he thought of the treatment ahead of him, he bit his lip. The trail of blood made its way down his chin.

He escaped _them_. He escaped Hell. Only to land in an even worse place. Oh, how he regretted surviving. How he regretted running away when he got the chance. Death would be better than that. Anything would be. He was as good as dead now anyway.

His screams could be heard in the whole ward.

* * *

Hydrotherapy… It actually sounded kind of comforting. But in reality, it was far from it. If the patient was hyperactive, he would get a very, very long bath that would make him tired. Lethargic patients, however, received cold baths, which were supposed to stimulate them.

He was restrained, as usual. Even after all this time, he was not used to this. His ankles and his feet hurt a lot, in some places the skin was bleeding.

"Were you crying and made your doctor unhappy again, hmm? Did the little dollybird misbehave?"

"Oh what a naughty kitten you are."

Both voices of the orderlies were similar; sickly sweet and full of deceit. He could not tell one from the other. He wasn't even able to distinguish their names. Hawk and Ray. Both very tall and well build, brown haired and always dressed in the same white clothes. In Ciel's mind, they were twins.

"We missed you. Our most favorite patient."

Yes, he remembered this. Many different wooden cupboards filled with, in his opinion, all different types of poisons. And all those metal instruments, tools of torture, sent a shiver down his spine. The treatment room. White walls, floor, and the ceiling, everything looked the same here. Was it on purpose? Was it supposed to create further confusion? White, the color of purity. He felt so _dirty_. But it was all blemished; the walls, floor and the ceiling, no longer the color of snow and innocence, but greyish, disgusting, and stained with blood and God knows what else, a picture of wrecked and ruined purity. Just like him.

One of them finally put him on the chair, and the boy breathed with relief. He hated being picked up and carried by the man. By _all_ of them.

"You have a long session ahead of you," said Hawk with a pleased tone. With one swift move of his hand, the large bathtub started to fill with water.

Ciel's hand, holding the plush rabbit, clenched on the toy even harder. For the whole time, he did not utter a single word.

"Haven't you learned yet? You can't have your treatment with this trash," commented Ray uncaringly. The other man chuckled in response and reached his hand for the stuffed rabbit.

"L-leave him," protested meekly Ciel, not letting go of the toy. The sound of rushing water was increasing his anxiety even more.

The man didn't reply. Instead he pulled even harder, harshly yanking away the plushy from Ciel's grasp.

"No," whined the boy. "He's mine, give him back!" he raised his voice a bit. It sounded scratchy, probably from his earlier screaming.

Ray only smiled and held the toy close to Ciel's face. "But I don't want you anymore," he said in a squeaky tone of the voice, as if pretending that it was the toy talking. "I hate you, I hate all mad people," he continued to mock and tease the boy.

"How mean!" the other man, Hawk exclaimed, faking shock. He decided to join the play and a nasty smirk was evident on his face. "You have to be punished, Mr. Rabbit!" he added firmly. He tore the toy out of Ray's grasp. "You will get tanked for misbehaving!" He proceeded to lower it to the bathtub, now full of water.

"Stop, you are going to break him!" shouted Ciel, fear mixed with anger evident in his voice. He thrashed in his restraints instinctively, even though he was fully aware that it was a futile attempt. There was no way he could break the leather straps.

"I'm drowning, help, help!" screeched the man, dunking half of the rabbit in the water.

"No, let go of him!" screamed Ciel with panic. He didn't want his most prized possession, his only reminiscent, to get damaged. It was the only thing that proved his memories were real, that he wasn't delusional, as they have kept telling him.

Finally, the man got bored and threw away the toy. It landed in the corner of the room with a quiet thump. Both men laughed.

"It's so easy to get you angry, kitten," murmured Ray, licking his lips. He caressed Ciel's left cheek with his fingers. "It's a real pity that such a sweet little thing has already had its mind shattered."

Ciel felt his heartbeat increase again; it was fluttering in his chest like a butterfly in a cage. He knew that tone and he really didn't like it.

"But we will try to make you better, dollybird. Isn't that what we are here for?" responded the second orderly. "Let's get you out of those clothes," he added.

Suddenly, two pair of hands were on him. One started to work on the restraints, freeing his wrists so there wouldn't be a problem with taking the oversized cloth off him, and the other was unbuttoning the gown. Soon, the white gown was on the floor, leaving him completely naked and exposed.

"Oh my, what happened here?" whispered huskily Hawk, looking at Ciel and forcibly holding his wrists together, thus restraining movement even though the straps were gone now.

There was a small bruise on his neck, but the boy couldn't even remember how he got it in the first place. He uncomfortably squirmed in the chair, wishing only for it all to end. He didn't know for how long he could bear it all, before losing the last shreds of his sanity.

The other orderly, Ray, also turned his gaze to the boy's throat. "I will kiss it better for you." He leaned down slightly, placing his lips on Ciel's neck.

Ciel's body went completely stiff, and he stopped breathing for a few seconds. It was happening again... The first few times (oh how long ago has it been?) he put up huge fights, but it only taught how useless and even more painful it could make things. He angered one of the orderlies so much back then, that the man mercilessly threw him against the cupboard, cracking his head open. He remembered the huge pool of blood, and the torment of getting stitches.

"Does it feel good, little lamb?" Hawk's breath was behind his ear now. "Do you want me to give you a kiss as well?" Without waiting for a reply, he kissed him on the mouth. Soon, his tongue forced its way inside, teasing him and making him feel sick.

"Nghh," a muffled sound of protest and disgust escaped Ciel's lips. He thrashed in the chair, trying to free his wrists from the man's hold.

As Ray started to plant light butterfly kisses alongside the boy's collarbone, his hand began to wander all around Ciel's body, tainting the skin with its touch. Ciel knew that no amount of baths would ever let him get rid off those invisible marks. He struggled even harder when the second orderly, Hawk, deepened his kiss even more.

Caught in the moment, Hawk's grip on boy's wrists loosened up a bit. Ciel immediately noticed this. They might have broken him, but not completely. His pride was still there, lingering somewhere. He managed to free one of the hands from the Hawk's grasp and he used all of his strength to scratch at his face.

Hawk hissed in pain and immediately pulled away from him. He made a mental note to himself to remember to have boy's nails clipped so that he won't be able to use them for weeks. Ray also backed away, alerted by the sudden movement.

Ciel couldn't help but smirk when he noticed that there was some blood oozing from the cut on Hawk's cheek, made by his own sharp and long neglected fingernails. Deep inside, he was scared of the consequences, but he wasn't planning on showing it.

The man narrowed his eyes, violently grabbing Ciel by the neck and making him kneel in the front of the bathtub. He then forced the boy's head beneath the water's surface. Ciel started to spasm, like a panicked, wounded animal trying to blindly hit the man, to get away, to do _something_.

"Not so feisty now, are we?" growled one of them. Ciel couldn't even understand the words, let alone who said them.

After a few seconds, what seemed like eternity to him, the orderly pulled Ciel back. The boy spluttered and began to cough up water. His breaths were coming out in short wheezes, chest rising and falling heavily, with obvious difficulty. Before he could even blink, he was yanked by the hair harshly, his head once again under the water. He didn't even have a will to fight anymore but his body thought otherwise, twisting wildly, trying to escape. His lungs burned and dark spots started to appear before his eyes. He was sure that he was going to drown.

Finally, he was freed again. He immediately started choking and gasping, barely able to breathe. Water splashed around him on the floor.

"Too bad we don't have more time today," said Ray, clearly disappointed.

Hawk was silent as he started to restrain Ciel's hands again. He then took a dirty piece of cloth from the cupboard and tied it over the boy's mouth. Ciel didn't even have a chance to protest, still shocked and confused. When Hawk finished, he leaned towards him, his mouth close to the boy's ear. "In the next session, I will rip you apart, you insane little whore," he whispered cruelly. Without any warning, he then picked Ciel up in a not so gentle way, and unceremoniously dumped him into the bathtub filled with ice-cold water.

The rag muffled Ciel's yelp. It was so unbelievably cold that he felt like he was going to die on the spot. Of course, he knew this wouldn't happen. He's been through this before – many times, actually.

Ray and Hawk finally left, leaving him alone in the room, bound and completely vulnerable. What if he passed out? What if… Maybe it was for the better. The torment would finally end... The water was reaching his neck and he was already shivering. It was not a good sign, for he knew that this treatment would last for many hours.

* * *

Drowsiness and apathy… If this treatment was supposed to "stimulate" him, it clearly wasn't working. By the time he was being pulled out of the bathtub (by _whom_, he didn't know), he couldn't even feel his body anymore. His breathing was shallow and slow. But he didn't try to bring himself to care now. Everything just seemed unreal, as if he was dreaming.

Someone roughly took off the restraints, dried him off and put back his white patient's gown on him before taking away the cloth from his mouth. As he was being forcibly leaded away form the room, he remembered his stuffed rabbit being thrown by one of the orderlies. He frantically looked around, finally setting his gaze in the corner of the room. A loud sigh could be heard, then some loud steps, and in a matter of seconds the plush rabbit was tightly hugged to his chest.

* * *

Ciel could not remember how he ended up there, but suddenly he noticed that he lay on the couch in Dr. Dosett's office, his wrists restrained and bound to the couch's frame. He was still shivering, feeling unnaturally clumsy, and on the verge of fainting. His skin was even more pale than usual, his lips bluish and his eyes staring unseeingly on the ceiling.

"Ciel. Tell me of your last hallucination."

Was it his imagination, or was he really breathing that loud?

"Speak, Ciel. Describe it to me."

"I'm really… cold…" the boy mumbled, his voice slurred.

The psychiatrist pressed lips into a thin line, clearly annoyed. "Very well then," he agreed at least. "I will give you a warm blanket if you tell me what did you see in your last hallucination, Ciel."

Ciel clutched the rabbit doll even harder. It was already dry and fortunately still in one piece.

"It was… a memory," he murmured silently, too tired and confused to put up with a man, and of course he wanted nothing more now than a big, cozy blanket. He knew very well that a psychiatrist was using the shock induced by the _treatment_ to manipulate him.

"No, Ciel," same monotone voice, sneaking into his head, trying to hypnotize him. "It's just your mind trying to make you think that it really happened. The reason for it is because you are very sick."

"I'm…"

Dr. Dosett interrupted him immediately. "Tell me what you saw, then."

Ciel sighed, lulling his head to the side and closed his eyes. "A cage," he whispered finally. There was a quiet scratching noise, probably Dr. Dosett was making some notes. "I was in it and then…" he stopped abruptly, when images suddenly appeared in front of his eyes. His breath hitched.

_Stone floor, darkness everywhere and many voices. Excitement in the air and sickly sweet metallic scent. Blood, blood, blood, so much of it._

"What is it, Ciel?" The voice was unsuccessfully trying to bring him back to consciousness again.

Silence. The man put a black pen down on the desk, his gaze still on Ciel.

"Answer me, Ciel. What do you see?" Dr. Dosett, noticing the change in the boy, stood up from his chair, quickly approaching the couch. He grabbed one of the restraints, giving it a sharp tug, trying to get the boy's attention.

His action surprisingly worked, and Ciel finally snapped out from the horror created by his mind. He looked at the psychiatrist, large blue eyes filled with fear and mistrust. Still, he couldn't bring himself to talk about the painful subject once again, no matter how tempting the offer of a blanket was.

After a long pause, Dr. Dosett grabbed his chair, placing it next to the couch, making the boy feel even more intimidated and cornered.

"We will talk about something else then, but you will not get a blanket. Moreover, you will not leave this room until you put into this session at least a tiny amount of effort," he commented, crossing his arms. "Do you understand, Ciel?"

"Fine," muttered the patient, closing his eyes again. He was very tired and wanted at least a bit of rest. This was better than the treatment. He could bear with it.

"Tell me about yourself, in that case. Do you know your surname?" Louder, more intrusive tone of the voice. He was already getting a headache…

"I told you many times before," the patient breathed, licking his lips. He was so thirsty now… He hadn't had anything to drink in at least twelve hours. "I'm… Ciel. Ciel Phantom…"

"No," the psychiatrist interrupted him again. "Deep down, you know this isn't true. You were abandoned on the streets. Your parents abandoned you," he remarked firmly, keeping eye contact with the patient at all times. "You are an orphan. A man who found you in the alleyway brought you here, seriously injured and completely delirious."

Ciel weakly shook his head. "You are wrong," he protested. "You know that I even have a proof, the rabbit has a logo…" he started, desperately wanting to explain for the millionth time, as if hoping to gain understanding this time.

"It is just a toy. There are thousand of toys like that one, it is a famous company. We have been through this many times, Ciel," answered Dr. Dosett impatiently, approaching one of the cupboards before opening it. He took something away from it.

Ciel grimaced. "No. This series was never released. It was a prototype my parents gave to me and before it could be…"

"Enough, Ciel," the psychiatrist silenced him, fed up with the boy's stubbornness. "It looks like the toy is triggering your episodes and doesn't allow you to get better. If I ever hear this nonsense again, I will confiscate the toy from you. Do you understand?"

Ciel nodded, knowing that the man could easily turn the threat into reality. However, he wanted nothing more than to strangle him to death right now.

"Good. Now, Ciel…" began the psychiatrist in a calm, even tone. He had some photograph in his hand. "I want you to open your eyes and look at this picture."

Ciel forced himself to comply, reveling tired, hazy blue eyes. In front of him, held by Dr. Dosett, was a photo of himself, all bruised and beaten, covered in blood, wearing nothing other than dirty shreds of what used to be clothes.

"Do you remember?" inquired the man, examining his face for any signs of recognition. "This was taken when you were being admitted."

Ciel looked away, hating what he was seeing. It was making him want to vomit. And most of all, it was bringing all the painful memories back to the surface of his mind again.

"Of course I remember," he mumbled. "People who ruined my family did this to me," he whispered, his voice full of hate. "The mansion was burned and…"

The psychiatrist shook his head with disappointment. "I can see that you are at least trying, Ciel, but it looks like your mind still hasn't cleared up yet," he said, obviously displeased. "I will have you escorted back to your room and your new treatment will start tomorrow."

Ciel felt sudden rush of fear at the word "treatment". "But I'm…" he tried to protest.

The man ignored him.

Ciel knew that he didn't come here mad. But he was certain that he would leave mad. If ever.


	3. Chapter 2

_AU: Thank you for all your reviews, favs and alerts! They made me really, really happy. Hope you will continue to read my story._

_I want to thank Shattered Apocalypse, my Beta-reader, as thanks to her you can all enjoy reading this chapter without errors :)_

* * *

Darkness. He feared it. All of the shadows lurking at him from the corners of the room seemed to represent his fears. It was torture; being so unbelievably tired, yet unable to fall asleep because of lack of any sense of security. Not only that though. What helped to keep him up at night were the disturbing noises. The screams, the moans, and the crying, all coming from the most delusional patients from the same ward, probably trapped in their own nightmares. He was terrified of them, of their madness, and most of all… of becoming one of them.

The stuffed rabbit fell to the floor, but he was unable to stand and pick it up.

* * *

Ciel was on his knees, vomiting on the floor after another session of being force-fed. It was only making things worse. How could they not see it? He desperately wanted to brush a strand of his hair from his face but his hands were restrained, making it impossible.

"Get up," said a harsh voice.

When he finally stopped throwing up, he looked at the nurse with clear annoyance. She was probably in her thirties, wearing a white outfit. Her brown hair was tied in a bun.

"Hurry up! How many times do I have to tell you?" she nagged impatiently. "The doctor wants to check your weight today."

Ciel complied, at the same time cursing her inside his head.

When they finally arrived at the doctor's office, the nurse left.

"Hello, Ciel," Dr. Dosett greeted him, his tone neutral as always. He looked up from the papers and got up from the chair, approaching the boy.

Ciel instinctively took a step back, not replying.

The psychiatrist's gaze was on him, scrutinizing him, immediately noticing his discomfort. "How are you feeling today?"

The patient shrugged, still avoiding meeting the doctor's eyes.

"What about Mr. Rabbit? Is he alright today?" the man tried again, noticing that the stuffed rabbit was, as always, clutched in Ciel's hand.

Ciel grimaced this time, hating being treated like a little child but not uttering a word.

"Not in the mood to talk?" The man sighed. "Well then, just get on the scale for me."

Ciel did what the man asked of him, carefully standing on a large silvery-white scale. When the psychiatrist checked the numbers on it, he clicked his tongue, obviously displeased.

"The weight has dropped again…" he muttered, more to himself than the patient. "Seventy-one pounds… You've lost another three pounds then. This really isn't good…"

"I feel fine," murmured Ciel quietly. Who cared if he was lying…? He hadn't felt fine in ages. His neck was itching. It was so irritating and he couldn't even scratch himself because of the restraints!

"You are not fine, Ciel," replied Dr. Dosett, his tone of the voice so serious that Ciel actually wanted to laugh at it. How dared he pretend to be concerned, when he was the one who put Ciel through all this torment, making him a shadow of himself, _breaking_ him?

"Your weight is dangerously low," continued the man. He stepped back, approaching his desk again and making some notes. "A twelve year old should…"

"What?" Ciel interrupted him, finally looking at him with confusion.

"I was saying that the weight of a twelve year old should be at least…"

Ciel chuckled humorlessly, not letting him finish once again. "But I'm only ten," he answered, fully confident.

Dr. Dosett didn't say anything for a long, uncomfortable moment. Finally, he brushed his hair with his fingers, as he usually did when troubled or tired, and turned to the patient. "Ciel, can you tell me what year you were born in?" he asked eventually.

"Eighteen-eighty-seven, of course," snapped Ciel, not liking the way things were going. Was it some sort of new, stupid test?

"That's right, Ciel," agreed Dr. Dosett, sounding a bit relieved. "And now we have eighteen-eighty-nine…"

The dark haired boy gasped, shock evident on his face. He slowly shook his head.

"It's been two years since you were admitted, Ciel." The man got up, approaching him. "Turn around. There is a mirror there. Look, and tell me if you can see any changes in a way your body looks."

Ciel, almost automatically, pivoted around, his gaze fixed on the large mirror showing a reflection of him. He… looked horrible. He closed his eyes for a few seconds, taking a deep breath. God, what happened to him? How was this possible? His skin was always pale, but now it looked completely white. Sickish, huge, dark shadows were around his eyes, making him similar to those panda creatures he saw in the picture books. And his hair… His hair, that used to be so pretty, shiny, silky… It was now completely tangled, dull and ugly. And he was so thin… The white gown revealed his collarbone and he could never remember it being so prominent. But… he could not really see anything that could indicate he was older. He was still small and short. Maybe it was his face? Now that he looked closer, his face looked a bit more mature. Or maybe it was just because his cheeks seemed so hollow, no longer signs of chubbiness? No. It was impossible. He didn't want to believe it. There was no way he spent two years here.

"Have you noticed anything, Ciel?" probed the psychiatrist in a non-intrusive voice, watching the boy carefully and making some notes as he was analyzing his behavior.

"No," Ciel mumbled at last, laughing nervously. "I know that you're lying, you're testing my reaction again," he said, as if trying to convince himself.

"Why would I do something like this, Ciel? Can you explain it to me?" Dr. Dosett asked, trying to understand his patient's reasoning.

"Because you want to drive me mad, you sick bastard!" growled furiously Ciel, losing control again. If only his hands were free, if only those stupid restraints would come off… Even though he knew it was impossible to escape, he was still trying to, his hands twisting.

"This isn't true. I want you to get better, Ciel. And this goes for all my patients," the psychiatrist said in a calm tone of the voice.

Ciel started laughing hysterically, deep inside feeling as if he was going to cry soon. All the emotions and shock were making him feel confused and trapped. "Unbelievable," he whispered, his lower lip starting to quiver without his consent. "How is making me vomit going to help? Why don't you explain it to me?" he hissed viciously, eyes narrowing with anger. "What about leaving me in freezing water for ages?" he continued without waiting for the answer.

"Ciel, stop. You're only making this worse for yourself. You are losing control again and you will make yourself even sicker. Try to…"

Ciel acted as if he didn't even hear him. There were tears in his eyes and his hands were shaking so badly that he was barely able to hold the stuffed rabbit. He was starting to feel ill because of the anxiety as well.

"What about using that twisted spinning-couch device you called a rotational therapy?" he yelled uncontrollably. "Or letting those two torment me?"

"There is no need to shout, Ciel. If you don't calm down, I will be forced to have you escorted to the treatment room immediately, instead of in the afternoon," replied the psychiatrist, ignoring his patient's screams and finally putting the black pen down.

Instead of helping, his words made the boy even more furious. Not caring about the consequences and fed up with absolutely everything, he threw a nasty smirk at the man. "Do it then, you sick, twisted psycho," he provoked the doctor angrily. "I promise you, you will regret everything you did to me, because I AM Earl Ciel Phantomhive!" The tone of his voice raised even more. "I may be only ten but it doesn't mean I don't have the power to kill you once I get out of here!" His grip on the rabbit doll got even stronger. His nails had been clipped yesterday after the incident with the orderlies, so at least he didn't have to worry about damaging the toy with them.

Dr. Dosett reached for the headphone of the big, brown telephone and started dialing number. Ciel noticed that he was saying something but he couldn't even make out the words.

"I will hunt you down once I'm out of here, you coward!" screamed Ciel again before he could even try to stop himself. He didn't understand what was wrong with him. It was this place. He knew it. It was slowly driving him insane. He always used to be so collected, calm in even the most difficult situations. Well mannered no matter what… It seemed that they really ruined him there completely.

The psychiatrist put down the phone, looking at the boy again. "You will undergo a new treatment in a few minutes, Ciel," he explained. "It will help you calm down," he added without hesitation.

"What did you come up with this time?" Ciel hissed, no longer able to yell because his throat was hurting. A rush of pure anxiety was making it harder for him to breathe. "What disgusting idea did you have? Damn you, why won't you talk? I've asked what they will do to me now?" he snarled again when the man didn't answer him.

Suddenly, the door opened with an unpleasant squeak and two people entered the office.

"We're here, Doctor. Heard that you've got a job for us," spoke one of them.

Ciel quickly turned around, his face getting paler with every second when he noticed the orderlies standing about two meters away from him.

"Yes, I want you to escort Ciel to the treatment room number five. Doctor Hill will administer the new treatment to him," replied the psychiatrist. "He already knows why the time of the appointment was changed."

"Of course, Doctor," muttered Hawk, together with Ray approaching a terrified Ciel who looked like he was about to start sobbing.

"Thank you." The psychiatrist went back to making notes and checking some patients' files.

"Hello there, little dollybird."

Ciel was the only one who heard the silent whisper.

* * *

He had never been in this room before. It was even scarier than the rest of them. More dirt on the walls. More weird looking instruments of torture. And more blood staining the floor. In the middle of the room there was an uncomfortable looking chair and some sort of a table with equipment on it. Right next to it, there was a man, well built, dark haired and dressed in a white kit, possibly the doctor that was supposed to administer the treatment, as Ciel thought.

The man briefly looked at the newcomers. "Bring him here and strap him to this chair," he said in an uncaring tone of a voice, gesturing at the furniture.

"W-why? What's going to happen?" asked quietly Ciel, voice full with fear and obviously not liking the idea of being completely left to their mercy, without any ability to move.

He was ignored by the psychiatrist. He started attempting to escape when Hawk and Ray grabbed him harder, totally immobilizing him.

One of the men leaned down a bit, whispering to him viciously. "It's called bloodletting, little kitten."

Ciel's breath hitched and he began to struggle like an, ironically, wild cat, trying to kick them. "Let go of me!" he protested, getting more and more desperate with every second. "I don't want that, get away from me!"

In a matter of seconds, he was strapped to a chair, brown, leather restraints blocking his every move. He frantically looked around, finally getting a good view at the instruments, which lay on the table. What stood out most was a silver lancet. His large blue eyes widened with anxiety even more, as he immediately understood that what the orderly told him was actually the truth.

"Untie me!" he yelped like a beaten puppy, no longer caring about the last shreds of his pride. The only thing he could concentrate on was thinking about being sliced with that thing, by the man who was treating him as if he wasn't even an animal but a mere object. Terror was totally controlling him and his instincts were telling him one thing: to run. "Don't do this to me, leave me alone! I just want to go home," he sobbed brokenly, not even embarrassed anymore as he felt warm tears trailing down his pale face.

The psychiatrist, fed up with the patient's attitude, backhanded him, making his head jerk to the side. To Ciel, worse than a sting of sharp pain was the humiliation. Before another word could escape his lips, the doctor proceed_ to _tie some dirty old rag over Ciel's mouth, and he only managed a muffled "mffgh", still thrashing relentlessly.

Ciel watched with terror as the psychiatrist began to wash his right arm area with soap and water. Then, a tight tourniquet was placed on his upper arm. Dr. Hill began to closely examine his hand, looking for a vein and after a few seconds, what seemed to Ciel like an hour, he took the lancet in his right palm. Ciel instinctively started squirming in the chair even though he knew it was pointless.

To Ciel's horror, the psychiatrist started to make a cut on his arm. More tears streamed down his cheeks, and the cloth over his mouth was suppressing his sobs. It _hurt_. It hurt, and it was scary, and disgusting, his blood so red, the life fluid exiting his body (were they killing him?), the look on the doctor's face so sadistic, and the lancet so sharp and cold against his skin and he just wanted to _get away_, away, away from it all.

Using his free hand, Dr. Hill put a hollow bowl close to the wound, catching the flowing blood in it. Ciel, trying to calm down, fixed his gaze on the stuffed rabbit doll, which was still grasped in his untouched hand. His breathing started to get a little bit less ragged as he examined the toy closely, ignoring the pain and his surroundings.

As the time was passing, Ciel realized that he was getting weaker and weaker. Deep down, it was really scaring him but at the same time, he just couldn't bring himself to care too much… All his muscles felt faint, the energy and his anger left him. His body was getting so numb… He didn't even feel it when another cut was made.

"That's a quart… Pass me another bowl. Also, note that the patient has calmed down, and appears relaxed now. Write that the delusions are completely gone, as well. " He barely heard the doctor's uncaring voice. It sounded as if it was coming from underwater.

Was it his imagination or was it getting really cold? He was shivering so badly now, he wanted nothing more than a warm, cozy blanket… The rabbit doll seemed strangely blurred and everything around him looked as if it was _spinning_… It was making him sick. And the air was so damp and heavy here; it was difficult to take a deep breath, the rag placed over his mouth making things even more difficult… His breathing became shallow and faster.

Something was wrong… But he wasn't even nervous anymore. He was so _tired_. He just couldn't understand why he was so dizzy.

The sound of his blood dripping into a bowl was quite disturbing. Was he bleeding out? Was it their aim?

And then a loud _thump_. Oh no. He dropped it. The rabbit was on the dirty, disgusting, bloodstained floor, oh no, how could he reach him if he couldn't _move_?

He twisted his head, trying to take a better look, when black spots appeared in front of his eyes. In a matter of seconds, he passed out.

* * *

Ciel's eyelids lifted slowly, but only partially. He felt really groggy, exhausted and still sleepy, but heavenly warm and wanting nothing more than to fall into a blissful slumber once again. It took him a long moment before his still not fully awakened senses started coming back to him. He sighed softly, his unfocused eyes looking around and trying to take in the surroundings.

"Oh my, aren't you a lovely creature, I could just eat you up… Did you sleep well, little kitten?" He heard the purring voice that he hated so much.

Only then he felt it. Those small touches, all over his neck and collarbone, too moist and heated to be left by something other than _lips_. His foggy mind still couldn't really comprehend what was happening. It… was actually quite pleasant, he couldn't deny, but at the same time, it felt revolting. Tainting.

"What… are you doin' to me?" he mumbled semi-coherently, his voice slurred.

"Do you like it?" He heard an answer, and the sensation on his throat finally was gone. "Do you want me to kiss you some more, pretty?"

A sudden rush of fear brought by that voice caused him to feel much more awake, though still he felt completely drained. His memories were becoming more and more clear and he realized how accurate the term 'drained' actually was.

_Bloodletting_. They've cut him and made him bleed until he fainted.

He immediately tried to get up; to his horror, he found out that this task didn't seem to be as easy as always. All his limbs seemed so unbelievably, unnaturally heavy. All his strength seemed to be gone. He noticed bandages on his arm, together with some spots of dried blood.

"Why is the little dollybird so eager to leave? " Another, also well known voice asked carelessly.

Ciel finally managed to sit up, but was so weak that he was barely able to uphold himself. Anxiety was helping a little bit, adrenaline making him stronger. He couldn't recognize where he was. It wasn't his room. This place was quite dark, its walls and ceiling dirty, and there wasn't a single window, the only faint light coming from the few candles placed on a wooden table. He was on a bed with old looking, stained covers that were surely white in the past.

"W-where am I?" he whispered uncertainly. He was getting more and more afraid with every passing second. He was somewhere in a creepy, lightless, isolated place, with _those_ two. Nothing good could come of this. And where was the plushy? He had to find it, when was the last time he had it…?

Instead of answering, Hawk replied with a question. He was sitting on a bed right next to the boy, his arm suddenly around Ciel, as if in a friendly gesture. "Do you like it here?"

"N-no. Why… why did you bring me here…" murmured Ciel, shifting uncomfortably, wanting to take that disgusting hand _off_ him but unable to do so, with his wrists still restrained and bound together.

"We didn't want to wake you," said Ray, smiling at him deceitfully. He moved, sitting by Ciel as well. The patient was now trapped between the two of them. "Isn't it quieter here than in your room? Isn't it better?"

"Exactly," agreed Hawk before Ciel could utter a word. "Weren't you feeling good, resting so peacefully, dreaming about sweet things? You make such cute noises when you are about to wake up… They were actually quite…" He paused, his gaze fixing on Ciel for a long moment. "Arousing," he finished finally. To Ciel, he now looked like a predator watching every move of his prey.

Ciel felt sick to his stomach. His face got even paler, and he squirmed uncomfortably, trying to get as far away from them as possible, which wasn't very far. He was literally trapped.

"Oh, don't be nervous, dollybird," Hawk muttered to him, reaching out, starting to touch Ciel's lips with a fingertip, tracing their shape. "Look, I have something for you," he added, finally withdrawing his finger. In his other hand there was a stuffed rabbit. He held out his arm, placing the toy in Ciel's hand.

The boy eyed him suspiciously before completely yanking the rabbit away from the man, as far as the restraints were letting him.

"It's only fair if you give us something in return, don't you think?" questioned the second orderly suggestively, observing Ciel.

Ciel then felt a cold, rough hand touching his thigh, uncovered by the bed sheets and revealed by a short patient's gown. His flesh broke out in goosebumps. The rate of his fluttering heart increased, getting more frantic as he got even more distressed, painfully aware of his inability to escape.

"N-no," he murmured, shaking his head slowly, the tone of his voice completely broken and despaired. His own body cheated him when tears started shimmering in his eyes, revealing his fear to them.

"Oh, dollybird, don't be like that," protested Hawk softly, his arm embracing the boy's fragile figure even harder.

This only worsened Ciel's state, wet trails already making their way down his cheeks. The closeness of the two men made him feel like suffocating.

"I want to… l-leave…" whispered the boy again, almost sobbing by now.

"There is no need for crying, we won't hit you like he did," Hawk promised, reaching out and wiping the tears away with his hand.

"Yes, things can even be pleasant," Ray added. His fingers started brushing Ciel's hair gently, as if petting him.

"I want to go to my room," pleaded Ciel, his voice barely audible. "J-just let me…"

"Why?" asked the second orderly. A smirk was evident on his face, making it clear that he was enjoying the whole situation. "Give me one reason why should I let you out of this bed now."

"B-because…" Ciel clutched the stuffed rabbit harder and bit his bottom lip unconsciously, almost making himself bleed. "I don't want to…. be here and…"

"But that's not a good excuse. We both want you here. That's two against one," replied Ray in what he probably thought was a reasoning tone.

Hawk nodded his head, agreeing with his co-worker, his gaze still completely fixated on Ciel. "Well then, are you going to be a good boy and play with us a little bit?" A well-hidden threat could easily be heard in his voice.

Ciel felt the tears already running down his neck by now, getting lost in the material of his patient's gown. He took a deep breath before answering, fear mixed with anger impossible to mishear. "If you… do anything to me, I will tell," he whispered. "I will tell everything and you will lose your jobs. Both of you."

Hawk narrowed his eyes, obviously very, very displeased. "You should not have said that. We were trying to be nice to you, but now you get what you've asked for," he growled.

"I…" began Ciel, not looking at them. Before he could finish the sentence, he was violently turned over onto his stomach. His head hit the metal frame of the bed hard, with a silent, pained "ow", and black spots appeared in front of his eyes for a few seconds. He suddenly felt that the left side of his face was pressed against the mattress, its fabric smelling musty and unpleasant.

"Do you really think someone's gonna believe you?" Hawk hissed viciously, his mouth close to Ciel's ear. "Who will believe in the words of a little, delusional _whore_?"

With the last cruel words, Ciel felt the white patient's gown being literally torn off him. And then the horrible sound of the belt being unbuckled. As he was trying to lift his head and get up, the second orderly, Ray grabbed him by the neck and harshly pushed his head into a pillow, holding him there and not letting go.

"No! Stop! God, p-please!" Ciel cried desperately, voice slightly muffled by the pillow. He was completely panicking now, twisting his body in any way possible and attempting escape. When he felt the man's palm touch the back of his thigh, he began to thrash even more, clawing at the covers and squirming to pull away.

The orderly only chuckled in response, before taking his trousers and underwear off. He lifted Ciel's hips a bit, grabbing them so hard that there would certainly be bruises left.

"P-please, leave me alone, just…"

No matter how much he tried to fight, scratch, kick and bite, they were all futile attempts.

"Shut up!" the man snapped impatiently, fed up with his struggling and the noises. Ciel shut his eyes tightly in reflex, shocked at the sudden outburst.

Ciel then felt his legs being spread apart in one rough movement, heard the disgusting sound of the orderly spitting into his palm and then… The sudden pressure, and then _pain_.

His lower body instinctively tensed up in a response, making everything even more difficult. A loud moan escaped his lips before he could stiffen it.

"God, stop," he choked, barely recognizing his own voice. "Please, it h-hurts!"

Ray, who was still forcing his face into a pillow with one hand, used his other palm to pet his hair gently. "Try to relax," he suggested, his tone so carefree.

"Go to h-hell!" screamed Ciel, his tone full of anguish and hate. Tears were freely running down his face now and he wasn't even attempting to stop them. He could feel the orderly's uneven breath and pleasured groans against his neck. They were making him feel even sicker and his trembling got worse.

Hands began to run down his skin: chest, stomach, waist, the hollow of his throat. Tainting everything, dirtying it, _ruining_ it.

A pained howl echoed in the room when Hawk finally completely forced his way inside Ciel's body.

"You look so beautiful…"

Fingernails clawing their way into his hips, bruising them. Another violent thrust. More pain. He felt something wet and warm trickling down his thighs.

"… when you're crying." The man whispered into his ear in an almost loving tone. "You look so sad. So _tragic. _Like a perfect broken little doll."

Ciel felt lips on every single bit of his flesh and tongue licking his whole body, teeth biting and devouring it mercilessly.

He finally stopped his movements out of exhaustion, only sobbing shamelessly, praying for this torture to end. There was nothing he could do. He was trapped, like he was once, in the cage. But this was even _worse_. He was so tired… and in pain. Even though it was difficult to admit, it was just so much easier to completely give up and lay still, letting them take what they wanted from him.

"That's it," whispered huskily Hawk, rewarding him with a brief kiss on the shoulder blade. "Just take it easy."

Ray, still stroking the grey hair with a bluish tint, eased his grip on boy's neck now, letting him breathe more freely. He was watching the terror, pain, and shame dancing across Ciel's face with a complete fascination. The boy's eyes looked so wide, pupils dilated and fresh tears streaming down his pale, porcelain cheeks.

When Ciel thought that things couldn't get any worse, they did. As a hand started caressing him, touching him like he never touched himself, making him feel pleasure through all this pain, his body started betraying him, devastating him on a completely new level.

He completely broke down, giving up, the last shreds of his will to fight, to stop them, left him. He didn't care about anything anymore. Even though the pain didn't lessen, he began to feel completely numb to it, as if it wasn't really him getting violated. He stopped crying, he stopped pleading and struggling. The palm, clutching the stuffed rabbit as if his life depended on it, finally let it go.

He allowed his mind to wander freely, far away from this place. Into his own _Wonderland_.

He didn't even flinch when _they _switched turns. He didn't even care when they left.

And he didn't even notice it had been hours since he'd been locked in a completely dark storage room.


	4. Chapter 3

_AU: Thank you for all your reviews, favs and follows! They make me very happy :)_

_Hope you will enjoy this chapter._

_Shattered Apocalypse, thank you for being my wonderful Beta-reader!_

* * *

_Something was running and he was chasing it. He didn't know what it was, or why he was so concerned with it, but it just seemed like the natural thing to do. Not looking at his feet, he suddenly tripped and started falling. How was it possible that he didn't even notice the huge hole in the ground?_

_He didn't know how much time passed before his eyelids finally lifted, but he had to close them again for a few seconds. The sun was just too bright to him. It didn't bother him, though, as he loved how warm it was here. He finally managed to get up, his senses almost attacked by all the different sensations._

_Sweet-smelling grass and fields of colorful blooming flowers were everywhere. The perfect blue sky was without any clouds. He was standing by a big fountain; __a nine-foot statue which depicted an angel upon the top of it. The clean water spouted and cascaded from an upper basin to the surrounding pool. It's sound was so peaceful and calming, accompanied by the singing birds. He was walking down the pathway leading to a forest without any rush. After all, it seemed like time was standing in this place. As he was going deeper into the forest, all of the sounds were getting more and more quiet. He could hear his own heartbeat, relaxed and steady. _

_He wanted to stay here. Forever._

_A sudden noise startled him, as something, once again, rushed next to him, moving extremely fast. It was small, white and furry… A rabbit. He didn't want to lose the chance to catch it this time._

"_Wait!" shouted Ciel, intrigued, and began to chase the creature. It was too fast though, and he quickly lost it. He didn't even notice how far in the woods he'd gotten himself into and doubted that he could find his way back to the fields. _

_There were many types of trees and flowers he'd never seen before, some of them looking out of this world. Tired from the running, he finally gave up and slowed down. He stopped by a pond filled with a whole variety of water lilies; white, pink, violet and red. Curious, he leaned down a bit, trying to get a better view. He could see his reflection now, mirrored by the pure water. He was wearing a light blue outfit with a white apron decorated by some ribbons and frills. The black and white striped stockings covered his legs. His palm gently touched one of the bows on costume, as if making sure it was real. The fabric was very soft._

_He blinked a few times but nothing changed. The white, torn gown was gone, along with the bruises, restraints and dark shadows under his eyes. His hair was neatly brushed and shiny. His skin was still pale, as always, but no longer looked sickish. Even his weight seemed to be altered, as he didn't resemble a starved animal anymore. And most of all… he didn't feel pain anymore. It was just as if he never went through any of the torment._

_He couldn't help it – a barely noticeable smile appeared on his face, immediately brightening it. Even after all this time, he still remembered how to._

* * *

"A patient? In the storage room?" questioned Doctor Dosett in a shocked voice.

He was walking through the ward, clearly in a hurry, a nurse along his side.

"Yes, Doctor," answered the woman with an uneasy look on her face. "I wanted to retrieve some bandages because there had been a small accident on the second floor and I found him there. He was completely unresponsive, though," she added.

In a matter of seconds, they reached their destination and the nurse opened the door, letting the psychiatrist into the room first.

Ciel lay curled up on the bed, completely naked, his form looking even smaller than usual. The dirty sheets were tangled around him and even from the distance it was possible to see stains on them; red spots disturbingly contrasting with the light colored covers.

The psychiatrist quickly walked over him, examining what exactly had been done to his body. There were many scratch marks and love bites all over Ciel's body. His gaze fixated on the inside side of the patient's thighs for a long moment. There were trails of dried blood there mixed with another, much lighter substance. He parted the patient's legs a bit, assessing the damage. The understanding and shock were obvious; he didn't hide them too well.

He finally turned his gaze to Ciel's face. A bit of blood was in his hair as well and when the psychiatrist brushed some of them away, a cut was revealed. However, Ciel seemed awake because his eyes were opened. However, they were completely glassy and hazy, focused on the opposite wall, even though there was nothing there to see.

"Ciel. How did this happen?" the man asked, the tone of his voice firm but still somewhat gentle.

The patient didn't even move. His body was completely still, and if not for the shallow breaths, one could think that he was already dead. The psychiatrist sighed, seeing that the patient was in no condition to talk. He knew that Ciel was probably in a shock because of the trauma. Perhaps it was better if the patient's injuries were first tended to.

"Nurse, please get Miss Kenward and have Ciel washed, and his injuries treated. Also, get him to eat and drink plenty of water, he appears to be dehydrated," he ordered, seeming deep in thought. "After this, I want him escorted to my office," he added.

The patient was dressed in a fresh, new gown and he lay on the couch, covered with a thin grey blanket. There was a bandage covering the cut on his head and his wrists were restrained but this time he wasn't bound to the couch's frame.

"Ciel, who did this to you?" Dr. Dosett was sitting in his chair, on the opposite side of the couch, his gaze turned to Ciel.

When there was no reply, he gently shook the patient's shoulder. "Ciel, I can't help if you don't tell me. Was it a member of staff? Or was it another patient?" he probed, his voice very serious.

Ciel didn't even stir and just lay there, like a perfectly still doll. Not moving, not speaking.

"You have to talk to me, Ciel. You are safe now," the man tried to convince him.

The boy continued to ignore him, as if he wasn't even seeing him.

"Ciel, listen," Dr. Dosett continued, his gaze never leaving Ciel's eyes. "If you don't tell me who hurt you, this person will remain unpunished. It is highly possible that he will assault you again, if he sees that there aren't any consequences. Do you understand that, Ciel?" he questioned. When there was no reaction, he spoke again. "For now, you can just relax here and think about it. If you make a decision to tell me about what happened, I'm here."

Sighing, the man stood up and approached his desk. He started looking through some files and writing up some reports, from time to time glancing at the patient to see if there were any changes in his behavior.

Ciel felt numb. When all those people were touching him, cleaning him up, talking to him just a few minutes ago, it was as if he was only watching everything, as if these things weren't really happening to him. He didn't understand anything. It's not like _they_ have done it for the first time. But this time… Something was different. He felt _detached_. His body seemed weak and heavy – he didn't think he could move even if he wished to. Ever since he snapped out of his dream-like state, or whatever it was, ever since the forest and the white rabbit disappeared, nothing seemed exactly real anymore and… Oh… He then remembered. _The rabbit._ It fell, oh no, he remembered, it hurt so much, and the bed was so uncomfortable, and he couldn't breathe, no, no, no.

His eyes suddenly seemed much more focused.

"The rabbit," he whispered, frantically looking around the room.

The psychiatrist immediately approached him, leaving his desk, sitting on the chair next to the couch so he would be on the same level as the patient.

"The rabbit," repeated anxiously Ciel, before the man could say anything. "Where is it? I have to-" He began to sit up, grimacing when he felt a rush of pain.

Dr. Dosett gently forced him to lay down again, pushing at his shoulders. "Calm down, Ciel. When was the last time you had it?" he inquired.

"That… room," murmured Ciel, looking away and nibbling at his bottom lip.

Images started appearing in his head again. No, no that… All those touches, and the kisses… And the _pain_. The feeling of being torn apart, and fear, and darkness. Disgusting. It was all disgusting, and he could still feel their hands on him, and those lips even though he was given a bath. So dirty, so disgusting, so filthy. He will never be clean again. And he _begged_. He was so ashamed of himself.

"Ciel, no," reprimanded him the psychiatrist, his hand briefly coming into contact with the patient's arm, trying to get his attention. "Don't lose focus now."

A small trickle of blood started making its way down Ciel's chin. His eyes were shut now.

"Relax, Ciel. Don't think about it now. It's unproductive," the man insisted.

"_God, stop." His own choking voice. "Please, it h-hurts!"__ His shameless sobbing._

_He couldn't breathe. One of them was pushing his face into a __pillow__ and he tried to squirm away from the pain, his nails clawing at the dirty sheets, as the orderly was forcing himself on him._

"_Try to rela__x__." Another voice,__ sounding __so carefree.__ A hand was stroking his hair gently, as if patting a favorite pet._

Ciel gasped and his eyelids suddenly lifted. He looked around again, trying to make sure where he was.

"Tell me who did it, Ciel," Dr. Dosett probed, once more, observing the boy intensely. "I was told that you were escorted to your room by the orderlies so it must have been done by a patient from another ward. Is that true, Ciel? Did this happen after the new treatment? Or once you got to your room?"

"_Who will believe in the words of a little, delusional whore?"_

Everyone here thought he was mad. They thought he was delusional and hallucinated. They wouldn't believe him. It would be his words against the words of two members of the staff. It would only make things worse. He didn't have any proof. If he admits, people will find out, his shame will be revealed. _They _will take revenge when they find out.

"I want it back," muttered Ciel, voice lacking any emotions, completely ignoring the questions. "My rabbit."

The psychiatrist nodded. "If it comforts you, I will ask the nurse to bring it to you now," he added. "However, if you do not speak to me about what happened, I will have to increase the number of treatment on your schedule, starting tomorrow. "

Ciel didn't say anything, but when he heard the last part, his eyes immediately shimmered with tears.

The man did not notice this, or maybe pretended not to. "When the nurse comes back, I will walk you back to your room," he said.

* * *

Ciel was apathetically following the psychiatrist, tightly holding a stuffed, tattered rabbit to his chest. His restraints weren't bound as tight as usual, so he could move his arms a bit. Everything seemed so unreal again. His legs seemed to move on their own accord, walking blindly and slowly. His eyes, looking more empty and soulless than ever, were watching the corridor and all of the surrounding people. When he spotted a boy with longish blonde hair and porcelain skin, holding a white rose, he stopped dead. Part of his hair was now shaved off, a long, fresh scar revealed.

Ciel had seen him many, many times before – it was impossible not to. They even spoke to each other from time to time. He was older than Ciel, as he was already seventeen. He also screamed the loudest at night, plagued by the horrors. In fact, the longer he'd been here, the worse his screams were becoming. He was always on the move, always running around if he could, always talking even when nobody was listening to him. And now… He just sat on one of the wooden, uncomfortable benches, without any restraints or a straitjacket. His face was blank and dull, lacking any recognition.

Ciel approached him, crouching down so they were on the same level. "Raikou... Are you alright?" he murmured, watching the other boy.

The boy didn't even twitch. Nothing changed. He was just staring ahead, dreamily, as if he saw something nobody else could.

"What's wrong, Ciel?" Dr. Dosett questioned and turned around, finally noticing that he was left behind.

"What… what happened to him?" whispered Ciel, his eyes widened. The rabbit doll was hugged tighter.

The psychiatrist followed his line of gaze, briefly looking at the sitting patient. "Raikou underwent one of the new experimental treatments yesterday," he explained enthusiastically. "It's called lobotomy. It finally freed Raikou from his psychosis," he added, and started explaining the procedure. "It consists of cutting some connections of brain and…"

Ciel wasn't listening anymore. His left hand was covering his mouth and he was still looking at the boy, terrified. It was unbelievable, how they'd managed to change that boy into… this. He just seemed dead now. His body was alive, but his mind just seemed to be… _Gone_. They turned him into some human zombie. Ciel felt sick.

"Come on now, Ciel. You will be fed in ten minutes. I have prepared a new feeding schedule for you. It will help you put some weight on," Doctor Dosett said. He finished the talk about the operation long moments ago but Ciel didn't even notice.

The blue-eyed boy acted as if he didn't even hear him.

"Ciel, hurry up," the psychiatrist insisted impatiently. "If you behave well, I may let you play with Raikou in the gardens tomorrow after your treatment, but you have to leave with me now," he added.

Ciel silently shook his head, feeling his stomach turning more and more with every passing second. He couldn't take it anymore. The treatments, the harassment, the assaults, the dead eyes of Raikou, the _Asylum_. It was slowly driving him mad. He knew it. It was finally getting to him. He was ashamed of his weakness but he felt like crying again.

"You killed him," he hissed suddenly, his voice trembling slightly.

"No, Ciel," argued the psychiatrist, his tone warning. "The treatment helped Raikou. He no longer suffers from delusions and no longer feels…"

Ciel immediately interrupted him.

"He can't feel _anything_ now!" he screamed, sounding hoarse. "You murderer! You sick bastard, he wasn't even insane! He just had… problems," he choked before he could stop himself.

"Enough, Ciel. Stop this nonsense."

"_Make me_," Ciel snarled viciously.

The psychiatrist started to approach him, causing Ciel to kick the bench with all his might. The flower, held by Raikou, fell to the floor when the furniture shook but the boy didn't even move, as if not noticing this.

"Don't you dare, don't you dare come near me!" Ciel continued to shout, getting the attention of everyone in the corridor. "You are completely mad!"

The psychiatrist, composed as always, stood about meter away from the boy, observing him. "Ciel, if you do not calm down, you will need to have an additional treatments tomorrow morning to help with your nerves. Do you understand?" he asked calmly and slowly, as if he was talking to a wild animal.

The word 'treatment' sent Ciel into hysterics. He completely lost it then. "No. No, not ever again! I will not let you destroy me!" His yells echoed off the dirty white walls. "I won't let you drive me insane!" With all his desperation he started pulling at the loosened restraints, twisting his wrists. Finally, to his shock, one of his hands just sneaked away. It was suddenly free from the leather restraint. He looked around frantically, trying to find anything that could help him. There was nothing, though. What did he expect anyway… It was obvious that they wouldn't place anything close to hazardous here.

"Ciel. Calm down. This is your last warning."

He wasn't even listening, not caring about the man's words in the slightest. Suddenly, something had changed. When he blinked and opened his eyes again, there was blood everywhere. It was making a large pool on the floor, and it was splattered on every single wall. Even his clothes were covered in it. A horrible, grotesque image. He gasped, startled. The sudden rush of fear caused his heart to flutter irregularly, to the point where it was painful.

"What is it? What's happened?" he whispered, terrified, his gaze now fixated on the red substance covering his white patient's gown. "Where is that blood coming from? Why aren't you doing anything?" he shrieked, his eyes wide and full of horror. The worst thing was the fact that the others appeared to not see anything. Were they only pretending? Or was he really the only one who could see what the room really looked like?

The psychiatrist was, as always, watching him, as if observing some laboratory specimen. The understanding was portrayed on his face. Some patients were looking at Ciel as well, but they appeared to be scared of him.

"Ciel, there is no blood," the man started explaining in a soothing, hypnotizing tone of the voice. "You are hallucinating again. It's just your mind, making you believe in something irrational, Ciel. Forget it. Block this delusion," he continued monotonously, as if trying to sneak his thoughts into Ciel's mind.

Ciel just laughed, but his laugh was void of any happiness. He looked at the boy sitting on the bench. "Raiko, can you imagine that? They're trying to make me believe that I went insane!" he chuckled again, completely humorlessly. "How _mad_ is that?"

As expected, there was no reaction from the patient. He still appeared to be somewhere far away, in his own dreamland. His glassy, hazy eyes were continuously staring at the wall. His palm was rigid in place, as if believing that the white rose was still there. If not for the fact that he was breathing, he could as well be dead.

"Raikou, stop ignoring me!" Ciel screamed again, watching the older boy intensely, waiting for his answer.

Nothing. He heard the psychiatrist saying something again, but he didn't care. It sounded as if it was coming from underwater.

"What's wrong with you?" he didn't know what'd gotten into him but he just couldn't stop shouting. "Are you insane now, like them? Raikou! Damn you, why won't you look at me? Did they tell you to ignore me?"

Ciel growled with anger, and before he knew what he was doing, he struck the blonde haired patient in the face. The hit was so hard that the boy almost fell from the bench. A red mark was already visible on his cheek, however, no sound of pain escaped his lips, nor did he show, in anyway, that the punch hurt him.

If anything, this made Ciel even more horrified. He had tears in his eyes again. God, he was crying all the time lately, but he just could not control it.

"Snap out if it, Raikou!" he choked, his breathing ragged from anxiety and tiredness. He started shaking the older boy's shoulder, as if trying to wake him up.

All of the sudden, a strong pair of arms grabbed him, forcefully pulling him away from the patient. He instinctively turned around, and for a second his heart stopped beating. The orderly. Hawk. His _rapist_.

He began to struggle, using all the strength he had left, his legs kicking in every direction. At one point, one of his hands managed to free itself from the man's grasp. He blindly hit the orderly in the face, but straight after this, the other orderly, Ray, caught his wrist roughly and immobilized it again.

"You are dead, Raikou!" Ciel screamed again, almost sobbing by now. He knew that his words sounded somehow irrational but his emotions were completely out of his control now. "There is nothing left of you! That bastard killed you!"

Doctor Dosett approached, still observing Ciel. "Please escort Ciel to his room immediately," he requested. "You will have to put additional restraints on him. Also, make sure his does not disturb other patients with the noise. When you finish, inform the nurse he won't be fed today as it could worsen his condition," he added.

"Of course, Doctor."

"Let go! Get your filthy hands off me! Not _them_!" Ciel protested, even more scared, as he was being dragged away. Everyone was looking at him, mostly with misunderstanding and disgust.

To his confusion, the blood disappeared.

* * *

By the time they reached the destined room, he was still trying to fight them: kicking, screaming, biting and trashing. Both men were obviously a lot stronger, so they didn't even have to put much effort into controlling the patient.

"Stop it, stop touching me!" His voice was shaking a bit now.

"Such a bad, naughty kitten you are, abusing other patients and upsetting your doctor," scowled Ray, holding Ciel's wrist so hard that bruises already started to form on the pale skin. "But you did not tell him about our play did you?" he asked rhetorically, clearly pleased. "Such a good, obedient boy you are." He kissed Ciel on the lips briefly. "Kitten knows how to keep secrets. Of course, they wouldn't believe him anyway."

Hawk smirked as they both carelessly dumped the boy on the bed. He then proceed to restrain his hands again, lacing the leather straps much tighter, to the point where it hurt.

"Baby kitten feels worse again, does he not? His mind is very, very confused and he sees _things_ again… I wonder what caused this to happen, why he won't get better. Poor, sweet little thing," Ray taunted and stroked Ciel's cheek. He then began to play with Ciel's hair, petting him as usual.

Hawk was finishing with the restraints when Ciel used the fact that they were distracted to his advantage. He kicked Hawk in the face. He didn't care about the consequences now. The look on the orderly's face was enough of the reward.

"Psychotic, little bitch_," _Hawk hissed with anger, his eyes narrowing as he looked at Ciel with hatred. "Restrain his legs," he threw at the second orderly.

Fear was evident in Ciel's eyes, but he was now silent, no longer shouting.

"Apologize," Hawk coldly demanded, his gaze never leaving the boy.

Ciel shook his head slowly, before speaking again, his voice quiet but vicious. "I hope it hurt, you bastard. You damn pedophi-"

The orderly didn't let him finish the sentence. His fist slammed the side of Ciel's face in a matter of seconds.

Ciel's eyes automatically shut, as a yelp of pain escaped his lips. It felt as if his cheekbone was crushed. Maybe he even broke it?

"Apologize," Hawk insisted again, his tone even more angered now.

_This is better. This is better than being… touched._

The man hit him again. That hit really stunned Ciel. His vision seemed to be blurred and all the noises sounded as if they were coming from underwater. He almost lost consciousness as dark spots appeared in front of his eyes.

"Don't you think that's enough? How are you going to explain this?" Ray asked, sounding displeased. He moved closer to the second orderly, as if ready to stop him, if necessary.

Hawk chuckled. "I will tell them that the little bitch had a fit again, and that's how this happened," he explained, not concerned.

"Mhm," muttered Ray. It was obvious that he wasn't convinced. "Can't you take care of him later, though? You know we have to go escort that old lunatic to the treatment room soon."

After a moment, Ciel's awareness slowly started to come back to him, unfortunately along with the pain. He groaned softly. He felt blood running down his mouth now; he had a nosebleed. Tears were already escaping his closed eyes as well; there was nothing he could do about it.

"Fine, you coward," sighed Hawk. He leaned down, whispering to Ciel. "You will never leave this place because nobody cares about you." He teasingly licked his earlobe. "But don't worry, I will come back tonight, dollybird. And I will fuck you so hard you will forget your name, _you disgusting, worthless whore_ _who gets off on being raped," _he promised viciously.

Ciel, unable to pretend that the beating and the man's cruel words didn't get to him, was sobbing uncontrollably now, choking on his own blood at times. He tilted his head to the side, pressing it into the mattress, at least trying to save himself from more humiliation and pain. It was also a bit easier to breathe like that.

Hawk smiled with satisfaction before turning around and starting to leave.

"Shut that bitch's mouth with that," he said, throwing a piece of cloth at Ray. "Doctor said he must not disturb others."

* * *

Ciel lay in the complete darkness, shivering from the cold. There was an old rag tied over his mouth. The blankets had been thrown to the floor by the orderlies, and he couldn't get them himself. As the time passed his fear grew more and more, knowing that Hawk would come back to turn his promise into reality.

He stopped crying long ago, and his blood stopped seeping through his wounds. It was still dirtying his face though, as no one had come to wash it off. His movements were more restrained than usual, as more brown leather straps were binding him. Still, he managed to keep his stuffed rabbit in his hand.

His breath hitched when he heard the sound of doors squeaking as someone opened them. Hearing a soft laugh he sighed, relived. He was sure it wasn't Hawk.

He could see someone's shadow now, as the person closed the door, walking further into the room. When the laugh became louder and clearer, Ciel began to get anxious all over again. It actually sounded disturbing, completely manic.

Seconds passed. Suddenly, the person was much closer, literally hovering over him. He could see things a bit more clearly now, thanks to the moon shining outside the window, granting the room some of its light, though not too clearly.

It was a boy, probably about nineteen years old. His face was pale and he had black, messy hair. His large green eyes were widened, pupils dilated and looking completely wild, lacking any sanity. Ciel recognized him as one of the high risk patients. The question was, what was he doing here, unlocked, unrestrained and completely free? He wasn't sure what it was that made him look down, but his eyes traveled to the other patient's gown. To his horror, it was drenched in what looked like fresh blood. The cloth tied over his mouth muffled his gasp.

The boy unexpectedly climbed onto the bed, sitting on Ciel, straddling his hips. He then smiled, cocking his head to the side and intensely observing the younger patient, just the way curious puppies do when they hear something interesting.

"Hello," he whispered finally, in a friendly tone.

Ciel shifted uncomfortably, well aware of the fact that he couldn't even try to escape; his restraints were too tight. He didn't know what to expect, though he was sure it wouldn't be pleasant. He didn't even know how to react, as he had no idea what the boy was capable of.

"You have been… _bleeding_." The patient blinked, smiling again. One of his fingers made its way to Ciel's face and he tugged the cloth down. Before Ciel could even say anything, he tenderly touched the revealed bloodied mouth, the remainder of Hawk's handiwork.

Ignoring the confusion in Ciel's anxious eyes, the boy leaned down; his tongue suddenly on Ciel's lips, slowly, sensually licking the blood off. Ciel immediately tensed under him, shutting his eyes in disgust. A muffled sound of protest could be heard. He was panicking even more now, the 'bloody kiss' bringing memories of the assault.

The brunet finally pulled away from him. Some of Ciel's blood was on his own lips now. He tried to brush the red liquid away with his finger, but only managed to smear most of it all over his chin.

"What are-"

Ciel didn't get to finish the sentence as the cloth was put over his mouth once again, effectively silencing him.

"Shh, you can't talk," the boy whispered again and frantically looked around, as if checking if they were alone here. "You will wake the exorcists," he added, barely audible.

It was then when Ciel noticed the large shard of glass in his other hand. It was dripping red liquid on the sheets. Ciel instinctively cringed, his breathing getting more uneven.

"I will tell you a secret," the patient murmured in a hushed voice. "I am a vampire."

Ciel didn't know if he should laugh or cry after hearing the declaration. He just wanted to run away by this point, as far away as he could. Some aspects of the stranger's behavior were very childlike in Ciel's opinion, and it was making things even more disturbing. It was as if he was just a young child, trapped in an adult's body.

"Oh, what is this?" The 'vampire' yanked the plush rabbit from Ciel's grasp in one swift movement. He giggled, smiling again and revealing completely normal, human teeth. "It's so ugly."

Before Ciel could even comprehend what was happening, the shard of glass stabbed the rabbit. As it was withdrawn a hole could be seen, white stuffing coming out. Seeing this, he instinctively tried to get up, growling in fury, the noise muted by the rag.

"I killed it," the newcomer said in a low voice as he grabbed the toy again and tossed it to the side.

The boy laughed innocently again, his eyes watching Ciel carefully, with fascination. His gaze stopped on Ciel's collarbone. There was a large love bite there. He tilted his head again, looking at it for a few seconds. Perhaps after deciding that he didn't like the weird looking bruise, he put the glass piece against it, and without any further warning, he slashed the marred skin with the shard, immediately drawing blood, along with Ciel's hiss of pain. He dipped his fingers in the red substance slowly and brought them to his mouth, without any hurry, licking and sucking on them.

"Delicious. I'm so _hungry_," he purred like a cat. "But…" his voice suddenly changed to a troubled, confused one. "That mark… I _know._ The exorcists left it," he added, his eyes narrowing slightly. He subconsciously licked his bottom lip, deep in thought.

Ciel looked at him, suddenly feeling intrigued. He figured by now that by "exorcists", the boy probably meant the orderlies. The disgust caused by the boy's action was still evident on his face, though.

"They did things to you, then," the 'vampire' concluded finally, still looking somehow distracted. "They used to do things to me as well. But they stopped. As I was getting older, they were coming less and less often… And then they stopped."

Ciel's eyes widened slightly. He didn't expect that. It meant that he wasn't the only one being harmed by the orderlies. And it also meant that they were only interested in children. He wanted to vomit. It was sick. How could anyone let this happen?

"I told the nurse once…" the boy began, anger creeping into his voice. "I described to her that he put it inside me and it hurt but she…" he stopped suddenly, snarling.

Ciel grimaced, closing his eyes and trying to block out the unwanted mental image and the boy's words. He didn't want to hear it anymore.

"That bitch," the 'vampire' breathed. "She told me that if I didn't stop spreading disgusting lies about sodomy, they would cut my tongue out." His nails scratched Ciel's wound on the collarbone, causing him to shiver in pain. "They did things to Nate and Raikou as well," the brunet murmured, his voice calmer again.

Ciel forced himself to open his eyes again at the mention of the second name.

"Nate hanged himself on the restraint when he was fifteen," the 'vampire' whispered again. It seemed like he was talking to himself now, completely losing his interest in Ciel. "Raikou was always screaming as if they were slaughtering him. They always used to come to him at night." He stopped abruptly for a second, thinking, before continuing. "They stopped a few months ago… But he still screams at night."

Ciel couldn't believe his words. He didn't _want_ to. It was just all too much to take it.

"I haven't seen Raikou today…" The patient frowned. "He was supposed to have a new treatment but I don't know where he's gone. I'm supposed to have it as well. Tomorrow."

Ciel couldn't help but feel a stung of pity. Tomorrow, yet another patient was to become a zombie. Still, he didn't know why the boy was telling him all this.

"But I don't want to," the 'vampire' hissed furiously, clearly angry again. He seemed extremely bipolar, his mood shifts completely extreme. "They say they want to _cure_ me. But I'm not mad! They are just jealous because I'm immortal! They want to take that power away from me!" he yelled suddenly.

This caused Ciel jump, totally startled. He noticed that the other patient clutched the weapon in his palm so hard, that he was bleeding. He didn't even seem to feel it.

'Vampire' giggled childishly, smiling at Ciel again. It appeared that his fury was gone. For now.

"You are so skittish," he whispered, his voice innocent and happy. "Are you afraid of me?" Not waiting for any response, he continued. "I played with Lily before coming here. But after I've cut her neck a bit, she stopped moving. I think she went back to sleep. I just wanted to taste her blood but more of it came out, much more than I expected," he said carelessly. "And I'm still hungry."

A shiver went down Ciel's spine as the realization hit him. So this was were all the blood was from.

"You are so skittish," the 'vampire' murmured, not even aware of the fact that he just repeated himself. "Are you afraid of me?"

_Yes_.

Ciel shook his head, silently answering. He wasn't entirely sure if it was a good decision. However, it seemed to please the other patient.

"I want to… devour you."

Ciel didn't even have the time to move when the glass shard was brought to his neck, making a cut there, fortunately missing an artery. The cloth suppressed his pain-filled moan, but there was no way to hide the tears, which immediately appeared in his eyes. He felt the boy shift, his weight putting much more pressure on Ciel as the brunet almost completely lay down on him. Ciel felt the 'vampire's' mouth on his own neck, kissing and licking the wound, pushing his tongue in it and swallowing the blood loudly, as if he was a starved animal that finally got its meal.

Ciel shut his eyes tightly when the 'vampire' started to bite into the cut, clamping his teeth down on the flesh roughly, deepening the injury and causing excruciating pain. Subconsciously, Ciel tried to squirm away from him, but the patient was too heavy and he couldn't even move an inch.

He didn't know how long it'd been when the patient finally took one last drought and pulled his head back. Blood was covering his lips and dripping down his chin. The green eyes were widened and glazed with almost drug-high ecstasy. The boy's pupils were so dilated that it was difficult to see his irises.

Ciel breathed with difficulty, anxiety making it harder with every moment. His neck was burning with pain and he was sure it was still bleeding. The pity he felt for the psychotic patient was gone.

The boy laughed softly, licking his lips and smearing the blood all over his face as he tried to wipe it off with his hand. He looked even more nightmarish now. When he looked at Ciel, he seemed like a predator, ready to catch his prey. Unexpectedly, he groaned quietly.

Ciel didn't know what was happening to him, but he prayed for the boy to leave him alone.

"It's The Voice," the patient muttered finally. "I have to do as he tells me, because otherwise…" He ran a hand through his hair nervously, dirtying the strands with crimson hued substance. "Otherwise he's so mean to me," he finished, barely audible.

He then tore off the cloth previously tied over Ciel's lips.

"Scream," he whispered, his voice full of sick obsession.

And then he stabbed Ciel's right eye with his glass shard. The blood curdling scream could be heard in the whole ward.

* * *

"Of course, I will show you immediately," Doctor Dosett promised, the tone of his voice lacking the usual neutrality. "This way, please."

Two men followed the psychiatrist into the half-lit corridor, clearly not concerned with the surroundings.

"Ciel never mentioned any other relatives, but I'm happy to hear that you finally managed to find him and want to take him home," the doctor continued to talk. "However, I must warn you that his mental condition is…"

One of the men interrupted him. "It's fine. He will receive proper care," he said.

The psychiatrist just nodded. His brow furrowed when noises coming from the room reached his ears. He started to walk faster, finally getting to destined place. He opened the door, revealing a horrifying scene.

Ciel, barely conscious and crying, slowly turned his head a bit, a figure looming over him. It was impossible to see his right eye due to the amount of blood. His left eye, however, stared at the newcomers, mirroring his shock when he recognized the two men, standing beside the psychiatrist.

The occult members.


	5. Chapter 4

_AU: Thank you very much for all your reviews and favs! I love them and they always motivate me :)_

_Shattered Apocalypse, thank you so much for beta-reading this chapter! _

* * *

The scene in front of him shocked the psychiatrist. On top of Ciel lay another patient; straddling the younger boy's hips and completely immobilizing him. When he turned around, alarmed by the noise, the Doctor noticed his bloodied gown and face, as well as the large piece of glass, drenched in red liquid. His eyes seemed both panicked and vicious, and a grimace appeared on his face as soon as he realized who was standing in the doorway. Ciel looked as if he went through hell and back. A wound on his neck could be clearly seen, as well as the blood mixed with tears, streaking down his face. What was the worst, however, was his right eye; it appeared to be horribly injured – the iris couldn't even be seen because of the blood, which was still flowing, making it look like Ciel was actually shedding tears of blood. What really surprised the psychiatrist though, was the fact that Ciel didn't look even slightly relieved when he titled his head to the side a bit, looking at the men. In fact, he appeared to be shocked and scared to see them. He was still crying from the pain and fear, unable to calm down.

Doctor Dosett took a deep breath, signalizing with his hand, asking the two men not to interfere. He was well aware of the fact that Ciel could be easily killed if one wrong movement was made. He took a slow step forward, trying not to aggravate the psychotic patient even further.

"Alexander," he spoke, his voice calm and even, yet firm. "Please, get off Ciel. You know the rules."

The 'vampire' boy looked at him with pure hatred, clenching the glass shard in his hand even harder. "I'm playing. Go away," he growled angrily.

"Alexander, I'm giving you a choice. It's either you leave Ciel immediately, or-" began the psychiatrist warningly, but was suddenly interrupted.

"This is ridiculous," muttered one of the men, exchanging annoyed glances with the other newcomer.

In a matter of seconds, he was by the bed, roughly grabbing the 'vampire' boy by the collar of his gown and throwing him to the floor. The glass shard landed in the corner of the room. The patient blinked; slightly stunned as he watched the man taking off Ciel's restraints, curiously cocking his head to the side. His eyes brightened with fascination and hope.

Ciel was looking at the man, confused and dizzy. Somehow, he knew that the wetness on his face was more than tears, which still were running down his cheeks. What was frightening him most, was the fact that he couldn't see with that eye. He was part _blind_. He wanted to touch his right eye but was too afraid to do so. Still in shock, caused by the injury, he couldn't fully comprehend what was happening when suddenly the binds restraining him no longer obstructed his movement. Before he fully realized this, the man effortlessly picked him up. For a moment he thought that he should start to struggle, to do everything to prevent being taken by them. But…

The truth was… he was _willing_ to go with them, even though he would never admit it. Anything was better than the Asylum. Even going back to the first Hell. And… leaving this place would actually give him some chance to escape.

Doctor Dosett, finally getting a grip of himself, quickly approached them. "You have to let me take a look at him first," he insisted firmly, watching the man holding Ciel. "He needs medical attention."

The second man stepped in, facial expression making it clear that he wasn't in the mood to argue. "No," he said simply. "We will take it from here."

"I insist, he-"

Before the psychiatrist could finish the sentence, a new person entered the room, clearly in a hurry, making the whole situation even more chaotic with his first sentence.

"Doctor! There's an emergency. One of the patient was found murdered, it's that lil' blonde girl from the first floor." The voice said quickly.

Ciel trembled slightly when he noticed Hawk, standing by the doorway. The man holding him briefly glanced at him, noticing this but he didn't comment.

Dosett seemed shocked, but he quickly composed himself. His gaze lingered on the blood wrenched gown and 'vampire' boy, who was watching Ciel, mesmerized. Understanding appeared on psychiatrist's face. "Excuse me," he said finally, looking at the man holding Ciel, fully aware that he had no power to stop them. He regretted it, though. After all, he was a doctor and it was his instinct to be concerned about an injured person. "I have matters to attend and they cannot wait. Please get him to the doctor as soon as possible and remember that his mental condition is not to be taken lightly." He bowed his head slightly before adding, "Hawk, please restrain Alexander immediately and take him to the isolation room." He turned around and left. He had his suspicions regarding Alexander's escape. The orderlies must have neglected their duties. He was definitely going to deal with this later.

'Vampire' boy's mood seemed to shift drastically again. His eyes were filled with tears in a second as he watched Ciel being carried out of the room. Still sore from the fall, he managed to crawl on his hands and knees to them, grabbing the man's leg before the orderly got to him.

"Please. Take me with you. Please, sir, don't leave me here, take me as well!" he begged frantically. "I will be good, I swear, I will do anything!"

The man just looked at him as if he was a disgusting worm, freeing his leg from the grasp in one swift movement. This caused the boy to completely break down. He started openly sobbing.

"Please, help me. They keep hurting me," he whispered, choking. "Don't leave, please, I'm begging you, sir. Help me. Please. Take me with you as well," he whined pathetically. "They… they will…"

This time, he got a response. A cold, barely audible chuckle. "We have no use for someone like you."

Hawk brutally shoved Alexander to the ground, and the boy's skull hit the floor with a disturbing cracking noise and a pained howl. He started struggling with all his might and began to cry even harder.

Ciel averted his eyes, not wanting to see anymore of this. As he was being carried out, his gaze landed on the damaged stuffed rabbit. He gasped softly and grasped the man's coat, getting his attention.

"Please, take the rabbit," he whispered, pointing his finger to the corner of the room where the toy was and avoiding the man's eyes.

"God, please! Help me! Don't leave me, sir! I want to see my brother! I don't want to die here!"

Alexander's screams could still be heard in the room, along with his hysterical sobs but they went on ignored. The man carrying Ciel turned around, took a few steps, and picked the plushy off the floor. He handed it to Ciel with an amused smirk and headed to the door.

Hawk narrowed his eyes with enmity as they were leaving, his anger caused by Ciel's morning incident still haunting him. When the door closed, he took that emotion out on the only available person in the room.

* * *

Ciel took a deep breath when they left the hospital. He was shivering from the cold but fresh air never felt that good. He hadn't been outside in a very long time. He held his rabbit doll tighter to his chest as, for the last time, he looked at the 'Bethlehem Lunatic Asylum' sign that hung at the entrance of the building.

"It took us quite a while to find you, little Phantomhive," the man holding him said suddenly, his tone void of negative emotions. "You haven't changed at all," he snickered. "In fact, I would say that you have gotten even smaller, I doubt they fed you much. If I did not know any better, I would have thought you were still ten."

The boy grimaced slightly, insulted at the comment concerning his small figure. As if it was his fault that he didn't grow much.

"Everyone has been waiting for you for these past two years," added the second man, walking along their side. "They will be very happy to finally see you with us."

Ciel didn't answer. He looked completely resigned and exhausted. The boy didn't even have the strength to attempt any escape.

* * *

His neck was still throbbing and the pain in his right eye was difficult to bear. No one bothered to tend his wounds. For them, it was probably for the best, as it saved them the effort of inflicting the wounds themselves. He figured that because he was already broken, they didn't have to do anything to him, not like the last time.

It'd been a day since he was locked in the cage, just like he used to be. A chain was attached to his ankle. Clearly, they had no intention of letting him get away this time. The place hadn't changed at all, if not for one little detail: there were certainly more blood stains everywhere.

Yesterday, all the occult members were there; looking at him, talking to him, touching him, some of them even petting him. He didn't understand that attitude.

Today, it had been very quiet. No one came to see him and he didn't get any food. One of the members mentioned to him that the one-day fest was supposed to purify his body, so he wasn't surprised.

Hours passed and when Ciel lifted his eyelids after dozing off for a bit, he noticed that more and more occult members started to gather in the room. He could see that they began some preparations. The altar was decorated in red and black expensive-looking materials, only the finest, softest and silkiest fabrics. There were flowers, too: whole red flower heads and white petals scattered around the altar. Candlelight surrounded the place, coming from thirteen large black candles.

Was it all for him? Were they preparing all this for his death?

He closed his eyes, clutching the rabbit toy.

_Let me out._

This wasn't happening. It was impossible. He didn't know what was real anymore. Everything had happened just too fast. The attack, the injury, the occult members. In fact, he was fairly sure that he was just dreaming now, as he did many times before. Most probably, his body was still in the Asylum somewhere, and he just lay there on the bed, thrashing and gasping because of this nightmare.

_I want out…_

Or… He went mad. The mere thought of it made him anxious. Had he finally been driven insane? Was he imagining all this? Was he _hallucinating_?

_Out…_

He didn't even notice when a man, his face hidden under a carnival mask, approached his cage and started to unlock it. The remaining shreds of his bloodied patient's gown were ripped off him.

"It's time," he whispered in an obsessed voice. "Finally, the ritual can be finished. It will be the greatest honor of your life."

_Help me. Someone help me._

Ciel's breath hitched. This was it.

_Please._

They are killing him tonight.

_Someone…_

His ankle was freed from the shackle, and despite his protest, he was dragged to the front along with his rabbit, _because he never let go_, and thrown straight on the cold surface of the sacrificial altar.

_Help me._

As they started to bind his wrists and ankles together, one woman forcefully yanked away the stuffed toy from his desperate grasp. He didn't even say anything, letting his head tumble to the breathing was ragged, panic and fear making him crazy. He didn't want to die. He wasn't ready. He wanted to…

He wanted to make them all pay.

_Just like a lamb for slaughter…_

The occult members, all dressed in black and wearing carnival masks, started some sort of ceremony, gathering in a circle around the altar, around him, whisper-chanting in a language he didn't understand.

He then saw the most important member of the occult, his robe red to emphasize his relevance, approaching him. There was something reflected by the candlelight in his hand… shining warningly. A crystal handled knife.

The man whispered something in the unknown melodic language as he raised his arm over Ciel's chest.

_If God has forsaken me…_

Ciel shut his eyes tightly, not wanting them to see the shimmering tears.

_Then I shall forsake God, too._

The knife was suddenly brought down mercilessly, cleaving into his flesh. Ciel screamed like he never screamed before, not even when he was being hurt in the Asylum. His voice echoed in the walls as blood spilled everywhere, together with the tears that streamed down his cheeks. As consciousness was slipping away from him, he managed to move his head slightly, watching his blood running down the altar in crimson rivulets.

_There is no such thing as God in this world!_

The cursed words, in the midst of sadness and anger, confusion and despair, acted like a trigger. All the candles except one suddenly distinguished. There were some gasps from the crowd, the excitement in the air smelled like blood. It was so much colder.

Ciel suddenly saw cat-eyes, shining purple in the darkness and… Teeth. Sharp, animal-like canines; a cheshire smile. He watched, fascinated, mesmerized, and slowly getting weaker and weaker with every drop of his blood that dripped to the marble floor.

And then… An amused, deep, murmuring voice, muting out all other sounds, hypnotizing him, drawing him in like a magnet…

"Oh? Well, well… What a little Master this is… You have summoned me. That fact will not change for eternity, and the sacrifice that has been made will never return. Once one has rejected faith, it is impossible for him to pass through the gates of Heaven."

_A demon._

Ciel felt a trickle of blood running down his lower lip. "Would someone who believed in God summon you?" he rasped weakly, voice filled with doubt, as if he wasn't sure whether he was just talking to his imagination.

A melodic laugh echoed in the room and the being spoke again.

"You have given a great sacrifice. Now it is your choice whether to make a contract and have your wishes granted, or not."

"I…" began Ciel, barely audibly, his eye watching the blood once again, freely leaving his body, and making it more and more weak. Of course he knew that. He knew that the price for having a wish granted by a demon was his soul.

The sound of loud, harsh footsteps getting closer and closer caught his attention. They sounded as if the person wearing them had metal heels. He looked up and his eyes widened. Beautiful black feathers were everywhere, as if falling from the ceiling.

"The price to cross the river has already been paid." The voice said again, but Ciel did not fully comprehend the meaning of those words. "Make a contract and I will end this suffering, little one."

Out of nowhere, he felt something touch his pale cheek gently, stroking it and wiping away the tears. It gave him an odd sense of comfort, tempting him without mercy to make a decision _now_. Somehow, the touch was taking away all his fear and pain. He felt very dizzy and his vision was blurry but he could see a dark shadow standing by him. He gasped when he noticed large, black-feathered wings protruding from the shadow's back.

"Now…" He shivered as the creature compassionately whispered into his ear. "Make your choice."

Yes. It was time to finally settle the score. He would not be a defenseless child anymore. Never again.

"I want power," he said, tone hoarse from his earlier screaming. "The power to take revenge on those who did this to me and my family," he added viciously, taking a deep breath. "And after I obtain my revenge, you can do to my soul whatever you want! Demon, I will make a contract with you!" he shouted desperately.

"Well then." The creature seemed very pleased, watching him intensely. "Let's mark our bodies with the contract seal. The more visible the place where your seal is, the stronger its power," it explained, its voice suggestive. "So where do you want-"

Ciel interrupted him, snapping impatiently. "Enough! Anywhere is fine. I want a power stronger than anyone else's! Form the contract now and grant my wish!"

In response, the being brushed away a loose strand of his hair from his face, leaning down over him.

"You are quite greedy, despite your small body," the demon chuckled softly. "It's permanently damaged," he murmured, observing the boy's marred iris. "Therefore… I shall put the seal on that big eye of yours, filled with despair."

Ciel instinctively trembled when he felt something getting closer to his face. He could see a flicker of violet light and then… Pain. A ripping, unbearable flash of pain, leaving him gasping for breath.

There was a mark in his right eye now, in the form of a pentacle. A five-pointed star inside a circle. It stained the blue to violet.

He suddenly realized that the restraints were taken off him, and to his awe, the wound on his chest closed up. He slowly sat up, but before he could get himself together, he heard the voice again.

"Well then… Give me an order, Master," the demon said, still observing him.

"_Kill them," _hissed Ciel viciously.

"Yes, my Lord."

And hell broke loose.

As black feathers, along with the demon's wings, moved, all the members of the occult, standing closest to the altar, backed away. Ciel had no doubt then; they could finally see _him_.

"It really showed up!" the excited voice of the leader exclaimed.

Ciel watched everything closely, a satisfied smirk appearing on his face. Yes, he was going to enjoy this spectacle.

"Grant me eternal life and-"

The man never got the time to finish as long, black claws suddenly protruded from his torso. His knees buckled, blood started gushing out and everyone started to yell in fear.

"The child is still alive! It's a devil's child!"

The woman's artery was stabbed. Crimson liquid seemed to be everywhere. The leader's head was suddenly rolling on the marble floor.

"A monster!"

Ciel's expression didn't change upon hearing those words. He observed the slaughter, finding it disturbingly satisfying. As the demon was killing the occult members, tearing off their limbs, cutting up their bodies, slashing through their skin, pulling out their intestines, still-warm blood pattered everywhere, like a rain, and some of it on him. He didn't even grimace. He was already dirty before…

At one point, the massacre became too much for him. He turned away, not wanting to throw up. He felt completely dizzy, deep inside still contemplating whether this was reality or not.

The screams finally stopped. He could only hear his loud, uneven breathing.

"They are all gone, Master."

Ciel could sense the presence of the demon close to him, as the being spoke. He nodded, not looking at him. He was still in shock.

"My little Lord. What is your name?" demon enquired softly, as if attempting to turn the child's attention away from the nightmarish scene.

"Ciel," the boy began, biting his lip. He still remembered the punishments every time he revealed his real name. "Ciel… Phantomhive. The one who will inherit the house of Earl Phantomhive," he added, voice full of confidence. As soon as he said that and no punishment came, he felt a part of his dignity being given back to him.

He heard a sound of approval made by the demon, as he let his eyelids drop for a long moment.

"Then I should take a form suitable of being in service to an Earl…"

When Ciel opened his eyes again, he saw what looked like a completely normal person. He stared with shock at the tall male with a sly smile, standing right next to the altar. The man had black, shiny hair of medium length, pale skin tone and red eyes, no longer glowing in the outfit consisted of black trousers, black elegant shoes, a white shirt, white gloves, a tailcoat and a vest.

The look of a perfect butler.

"Just to make things perfectly clear… Please, state your other expectations, Master, besides aiding you with revenge," said the demon, his eyes never leaving Ciel.

Ciel looked at him in a slightly scrutinizing manner, clearly thinking it over for a moment before answering.

"Be my sword. Always protect me and never dare to betray me until I get my revenge," he answered firmly. "Obey my orders unconditionally and… Never lie to me."

The demon bowed his head slightly and kneeled on one knee in front of him.

"Yes, my Lord," he vowed and stood up. "Shall we take our leave then?" he asked rhetorically. "Please, let me help you to the door, this place is quite… filthy. I would not want your feet to get dirty, Master."

Ciel looked at the ground: piles of bodies everywhere, some of which were no longer whole, and there was a pool of blood. Hesitantly, he agreed, still not entirely comfortable with the thought of being touched.

The demon effortlessly lifted Ciel; his left hand under the boy's knees, and right hand on his upper back. For the first few seconds Ciel was embarrassed about being carried 'bridal style' but he quickly got used to it, relieved that he didn't have to touch anymore of the nightmarish remains of the occult members. As he watched the floor filled with flowers, blood and human limbs, he suddenly noticed the rabbit doll, also dyed red. He instinctively shifted, trying to get a better look at it.

The demon immediately noticed this, and without saying anything, stepped forward, picking up the toy and giving it to Ciel. Yes… His new Master was most certainly… Interesting.

Ciel couldn't help it when a shadow of a smile appeared on his face. It was very convenient that… this being could foresee his needs and wants. He visibly relaxed, his body going a bit limp, head resting close to the demon's neck.

"What's your name?" he murmured suddenly, trying not to show much interest.

"Whatever my Master wishes."

Ciel thought for a second, as memories of the loyal black creature he lost in the fire filled his mind.

"Sebastian," he answered finally. "From now on your name will be Sebastian."

The demon hummed in an agreement. "Well then, please call me Sebastian. Is that the name of your former butler?" he enquired, clearly not caring about that fact.

"No. It was my dog's name."

Sebastian didn't comment, though he looked like he wanted to.

"Burn down this place when we leave," Ciel commanded coldly, not looking back.

"As you wish, Young Master," replied Sebastian.

When they stepped outside, it was snowing. A blanket of pure, white snow covered the landscape, and the _snowfall_ was silent, slow, delicate and comforting. It was an enormous contrast to the fresh red blood and screams.

Out of nowhere, Sebastian produced a grey blanket he must have somehow taken away from the building without Ciel noticing. He wrapped it around the boy's body, sheltering it from the cold. Ciel watched the scenery for a moment, before he completely relaxed in demon's arms.

"There is a… summerhouse in London called Meadow View… Find it," he whispered tiredly, barely able to stay awake now, as adrenaline finally left him. "We can go there. For now…"

"Of course, Master," agreed Sebastian. "As soon as we get there, your injuries need to be looked at," he added.

It would be such a waste if his newest meal died before he could have a chance at properly seasoning and devouring it… What kind of demon would he be, if he let that happen?

"Mhmm… Take care of it. This is an order," murmured Ciel, getting more and more sleepy with every second. He hugged the rabbit doll tighter and let himself close his eyes. He subconsciously nuzzled his face into demon's neck, seeking warmth and quickly falling asleep. He didn't expect Sebastian to have a pulse, but the demon did.


	6. Chapter 5

_AU: Thank you very much for all reviews, follows, and favs, they mean so much to me! :)_

_Shattered Apocalypse, thank you very much for beta-reading this chapter, you are a star!_

* * *

With a soft sigh, Ciel's eyelids partially lifted. It took him a long moment to realize that his face was nuzzled in someone's warm neck, hiding away from everything, and that he was actually above the ground, being carried.

"Finally awake, my Master?" He heard a calm, melodic voice. "Right on time. We have just arrived."

"Seb…astian?" A semi-coherent murmur escaped his lips as he shifted slightly. A strand of the demon's hair brushed against his cheek, tickling it slightly. "I thought… I was dreaming," he murmured, letting his eyes close once again as he felt a blissful wave of calmness and security.

A chuckle. "You were not, Master, I assure you."

Ciel then felt the soft surface of covers as Sebastian lay him on a bed. He ran his hand over the sheet, touching the fabric and forced himself to open his eyes again and look around. It was just as he remembered…

The room was surrounded by the glow coming from the fireplace. The dark wooden floor, though very dusty, remained without any scratches, and the walls still had the same crimson color. Even the furniture… There was still jewelry and a hairbrush left on his mother's white dressing table with three mirrors; one large and two small ones. His parents' bedroom seemed just like it did years ago. If not for some dirt, one could have thought that time had stopped here.

"My Lord?" Sebastian's voice brought him back to reality. He looked at the demon standing close to the bed, almost hovering over him, his gaze slightly unfocused.

"Yes?" he muttered, his voice slightly slurred.

"Do you want me to call for a doctor or...?"

"No!" Ciel interrupted him desperately. He immediately seemed panicked as he raised himself on his elbows, trying to get up.

"As you wish, Master. I will tend to your injuries then," promised the demon, gently pushing at his shoulders and forcing him to lay back again.

Ciel nodded, licking his bottom lip nervously, tasting dried blood. He suddenly noticed that the stuffed rabbit he was still holding had been fixed; there was no hole in it anymore and it was clean, no longer bloodstained.

"Does your eye still hurt, Master?" Sebastian inquired and Ciel silently nodded once again. "Please, allow me to take a look at it." Without waiting for an answer, he titled Ciel's head a bit and used his finger to gently pry the eyelid open, examining the injury, which was now much less visible due to the contract mark.

"It's useless, isn't it?" mumbled Ciel without any emotion. "You weren't mistaken when you said it's permanently damaged, were you? I can't even see any shapes or colors with it…"

"Yes. I am very sorry, Master. But at least the bleeding has finally ceased," answered the demon, though Ciel was certain he was faking all the concern. After all, it was his duty, as a butler, to make sure of Ciel's wellbeing. He didn't care, though. It was enough for him. "However, I would not call it completely useless…" he added. "Now, it will always let me find you, and allow you to call me."

The demon finally let go and reached for something from the nightstand. Ciel noticed that he brought a bowl of water, a needle, a thread, some alcohol, a pair of scissors, gauze, a towel, and bandages.

"I'm… glad," replied Ciel quietly, not looking at him. He was a bit anxious now. Still, he preferred to have Sebastian take care of him, instead of some unknown doctor. He doubted that he could ever trust any doctor again.

"Master, I believe it would be best to cover the injured eye. It will heal faster this way. Is that okay with you?"

"Fine," Ciel murmured quietly.

The demon, holding a piece of white gauze in his hand, carefully set it in place, tying it over the boy's head so it wouldn't move and bother him. When he finished, Ciel rested his head against the pillow once again.

"I will have to put some ice on that one," Sebastian informed after a moment, as his fingers brushed the wound on Ciel's neck. Seeing Ciel's questioning gaze, he added. "To numb that area. You will need some stitches, my Lord; that cut is quite deep."

"Fine, do what you have to," the boy agreed, not having much choice. He shivered slightly when he felt the coldness spreading on his throat. It wasn't entirely unpleasant, though, because it was lessening the pain.

"You can relax, Master," said the demon, sensing the boy's nervousness. His tone was very calm, and somehow comforting. "Please, just rest now. I will not hurt you," he assured.

Ciel's body immediately responded, getting much less tense. He sighed, letting his head fall against the fluffy pillow once again and closing his eyes. Seconds later, he felt a wet material on his face, carefully wiping away the blood. A large bruise was on his cheek, left by Hawk was revealed.

When the demon finished with the first task, he reached for the alcohol, pouring some on the towel. "This may sting a bit, Young Master," he warned before gently dabbing at the injury on Ciel's neck. The boy hissed but tried his best not to move. When Sebastian was done cleaning the injury of dirt and debris, he began to sew the wound together, using the previously sanitized needle and an alcohol soaked thread. Ciel tried not to think about it when the demon precisely poked the needle through one piece of the skin, close to the cut and pulled the thread. For some reason, the thought of it was making him feel very weak. He fixated his gaze on the rabbit doll, trying to think about something else, afraid to pass out.

"Almost done, Master," assured Sebastian as he tied a knot at the end of the thread, making it as tight as possible to help keep the stitching together. He quickly reached for the scissors and cut the remainder of the thread above the knot. "There," he murmured, looking at his work, clearly satisfied with the result. After grasping the wet towel again and carefully cleaning away some remaining blood from the neck, the demon bandaged it. "Is the pain worse again?" he inquired suddenly, looking at the boy's face. "You are awfully pale."

"I'm fine," answered Ciel, his voice slightly annoyed now. He didn't want to admit to his weakness.

Sebastian didn't comment. "Can you pull the covers down a little bit, Master? I need to take care of that chest injury. Even though it's almost completely closed up now, I wouldn't want it to get infected," he said.

Ciel complied, though it was obvious that he was uncomfortable. Still, without saying anything, he let the demon clean the wound with alcohol and water.

"Let me help you sit up for a moment, my Lord, I have to bandage that, as well," murmured Sebastian.

Ciel let him do as he pleased. His gaze was fixated on the water in the bowl, which was now dark pink, almost red.

"All done," announced Sebastian. "I found you a nightshirt," he added, and out of nowhere, produced a white shirt. He effortlessly – as if he'd been doing it for his whole lifetime – dressed Ciel, and to his surprise, the shirt was still a little bit oversized on the boy's body. It really seemed that he hadn't grown much. "I suppose the bath can wait for tomorrow," he spoke, making him lay down again and covering him with a warm, cozy blanket. "I will quickly prepare you something to eat and-"

Ciel didn't let him finish. "There's no food here," he mumbled, clearly displeased that the demon didn't think of something so ridiculously logical. "Nobody has been in this house for years."

Sebastian chuckled. "I have picked up fresh food on our way there. Surely I would not expect my Master to eat rotten meals, which would make him ill."

"Impressive," replied Ciel dryly, clearly not meaning it. "But I don't want anything to eat today," he added, rolling to the side, his back turned to the demon. The mere thought of food made him want to gag… He still remembered being force-fed… Still, he would have to eat. Tomorrow. He brought the rabbit toy close to his chest, hugging it under the cover so the demon wouldn't see. "Bring me some water instead. I just… want to sleep," he murmured, clearly still exhausted.

"As you wish, my Lord."

The demon bowed his head slightly and left.

* * *

When Ciel's eyelid lifted, on cue the curtains were opened, exposing the snowy weather. He sighed, stretching like a cat.

"Good morning, Young Master," an enthusiastic voice spoke, and Ciel finally noticed Sebastian, standing close to his bed. "Are you feeling better today?"

"Mhm," answered Ciel, almost incoherent. He actually was a bit better… He wasn't in so much pain anymore, except for the occasional throbbing of his wounds, and he couldn't remember the last time he had slept so peacefully.

"Can I suggest a breakfast in bed, my Lord? You are still recovering and you should rest," said Sebastian, watching him.

"Okay," agreed Ciel, deep in thought.

There were so many things he had to take care of… He didn't know where to start. He had to begin the investigation regarding the death of his parents, contact the Queen, Lizzy, and his aunt, and he also needed to restore the company… He was getting a headache just thinking about it all. But he could do all this, he was sure of it.

He didn't even notice Sebastian entering the room, but suddenly there was a wheeled silver trolley by his bed, a cup of tea and a large bowl of oatmeal on it.

"For today's breakfast, I have prepared freshly made oatmeal with applesauce and cinnamon. It is light on the stomach yet very nutritional," the butler explained.

Ciel sat up and dangled his legs over the side of the bed before sampling the food with a silver spoon. He grimaced and in one swift movement threw the bowl against the wall. The meal splattered everywhere, and much of it stained Sebastian's uniform.

"This is disgusting," Ciel commented harshly. "What the hell did you put in-" he broke off, shaking his head. "I don't even want to know. Clean it up and bring me something else."

"My apologies, Master," replied Sebastian emotionlessly. His eyes narrowed slightly as he watched Ciel drinking.

* * *

The other meal had been approved by Ciel. With his plush rabbit placed on the shelf, close to him, he sat in a bathtub filled with blissfully warm water. At first he was a bit anxious, because for the last two years, a bathing experience usually wasn't a very pleasant one. He shivered, thinking of the treatments; hours of being painfully restrained, submerged in the ice cold water and getting almost drowned by the orderlies. In addition, before he got used to it, he found it slightly uncomfortable to be naked around Sebastian, but he convinced himself that it was his butler, after all, and that's what butlers did. Not to mention the fact that Sebastian wasn't even human to begin with. There was nothing to be afraid of. He was a demon; he wouldn't even be interested in a meal in that sense, not like _them_.

He sighed dreamily and leaned forward a bit, letting his head rest on his arms, folded over the side of the tub, now completely relaxed. It felt good, with the warmth surrounding him and the peaceful silence (except for the occasional sounds of splashing water), as Sebastian gently cleaned his body of the blood and dirt with a washcloth.

"Sebastian," he murmured suddenly, his voice a bit sleepy. "Contact Angelina Durless and the Midfords. I will tell you where you can find them… Also, try to find Tanaka's whereabouts... I want you to invite them all here as soon as possible," he murmured.

"Yes, my Lord," answered simply the demon, continuing with the task.

Ciel couldn't help but squirm anxiously when the butler began to wash his private areas. He didn't speak for the remaining duration of the bath.

* * *

It'd been a while since Sebastian left. Ciel, not wanting to waste any time, had begun the work on bringing back the company. He was sitting at his desk, filled with papers and sketches. Currently, he was making projects for the new series of toys: a happy Rabbit Family. At least, he had drawing skills and a big imagination, so it wasn't that hard for him. Still, he was exhausted; one night of sleep couldn't compensate for everything that had happened. Not to mention the injuries and the fact that he still couldn't get used to being part blind.

The door suddenly opened and Sebastian walked in. Ciel was surprised at how quickly the demon completed his order.

"Master, you were supposed to be resting," Sebastian commented, looking a bit displeased. "You are not well enough to-"

Ciel interrupted him. "Shut up. How did it go?" he murmured, resting his elbows on the desk. "When are they visiting?"

The butler looked at him for a second before answering.

"I am afraid they will not be visiting, Master," he said, his eyes on Ciel, observing his reaction. Before Ciel had a chance to scowl him for the lack of explanation, the demon spoke again. "They are all dead."

Ciel paled, one large, blue eye widened slightly. It took him a long moment to comprehend what Sebastian said. His breathing got slightly erratic and his hand grasped the desk, nails clawing into the wood furiously.

"How?" he whispered shakily.

"Murder," replied Sebastian. "The killer was never found. All the murders happened two years ago, in the same week. The cause of death was blood loss. All of them had their throats slit," he recited.

"Even… Elizabeth?" Ciel muttered, not looking at him, clearly deep in thought.

"Yes. The whole Midfords family."

Ciel's eyes narrowed, his palms trembled slightly. "Bastards!" he growled, tone of the voice filled with hatred. He couldn't stop himself, grasping the first thing he could see, an empty glass flower vase and threw it across the room, shattering it.

"Master, I know that the news upsets you, but you shouldn't overexert yourself, because-" Sebastian tried to say, but Ciel didn't let him finish the sentence.

"Upset me!" Ciel chuckled humorlessly. "They angered me, that's all," he hissed viciously as he grabbed one of the sketches he made earlier and ripped it to shreds. "I cannot get upset! Do you think I would _cry _over their corpses, demon?" he laughed hysterically, as a trail of blood began to run down his chin, having bitten his bottom lip too hard. "Answer me!"

Sebastian's gaze was fixated on the mess the young Phantomhive had made.

"No, my Lord," he responded emotionlessly.

"Liar!" accused the boy, as he began to destroy another sketch, this time, the one that portrayed the smallest rabbit of the Rabbit Family. "I wouldn't cry, I will never cry again because such feelings are useless and only make people weak!" he shouted, his breathing getting more ragged with every second. "Without my hatred, there would be nothing left of me, I don't feel anything else anymore!" He grabbed something from the shelf. "Get the hell out of here and leave me alone!"

Sebastian nodded his head slightly and complied with the order. He left just in time, before a porcelain angel figure could hit him.

* * *

About ten minutes passed, and the sound of objects being damaged subsided. However, after hearing a suspiciously loud _thump_, he entered the room again. After all, his Master did not specify when could he come back. The room… was a complete mess. Many things were broken, shattered pieces lay everywhere. It was such a pity that he'd already cleaned up the room in the morning.

Sebastian immediately spotted Ciel, lay on the floor. The boy was even paler than earlier, his breathing erratic and unnaturally loud. He was coughing as well, and it was clear that he was having trouble getting air into his lungs.

The demon quickly approached Ciel, crouching down right next to him. He appeared slightly alarmed, unsure of what to do. He gently touched Ciel's shoulder, trying to get his attention.

"Master, what can I do to help?" he inquired, his voice lacking its usual demeanor and calm. "Shall I get you to the doctor?"

"N-nhnn…no," Ciel finally managed to say, gasping for breath. He was getting dizzy from the lack of air. "Will be… f-fine," he wheezed, almost choking. "Just… asthma," he coughed again.

He felt extreme anxiety and panic. It was always like that during his asthma attacks. He absolutely loathed them. He hated being so vulnerable. The chest pain and pressure were making everything worse.

"As you wish, my Lord. I will help you get more comfortable then," Sebastian said, now looking a bit more confident, before carefully lifting him off the floor. Ciel instinctively wrapped his arms around the demon's neck, fighting for every single breath.

"R-rabbit," whispered Ciel, barely audibly, before getting another violent fit of cough.

Sebastian, without unnecessary comments, picked the rabbit from the desk, giving it to the boy.

"Master, did I not tell you not to overexert yourself?" he lectured the boy, sighing softly. "Look how ill you have made yourself, even after you yourself insisted that that you would not be upset over mere corpses." He smirked.

Ciel gasped even harder upon hearing his words and in a matter of seconds, his hand blindly reached out and struck Sebastian's cheek, harshly slapping him. A red mark marred the pale skin.

"How… _dare_ you?" he hissed viciously and tried to add something, but his body chose that moment to worsen his condition. Every breath seemed like the first one, almost like after having his head forced under the water's surface.

"Master, please do not do such things without warning me first. Otherwise, I might _accidentally_ drop you," murmured Sebastian, clearly mocking him, his voice far too kind to be sincere.

Ciel wanted to silence him, but he wasn't able to utter a single word. His chest heaved with effort, nails unconsciously clawing into the Sebastian's neck.

The demon didn't wince, as if he wasn't even feeling it, and carried Ciel straight to bed. He lay Ciel on the side, figuring it might make it a bit easier to breathe in the position, and placed an additional pillow under his head, propping it up a bit.

"I… told you… to," rasped Ciel again, wheezing. He wanted to tell Sebastian to leave, still immensely angered at the disrespect showed by the butler.

"Master, try not to talk so much, it's making your condition worse," the demon replied, his tone carefree. He leaned down and unbuttoned the first few buttons of Ciel's shirt, wanting to make it less restricting. "You have to rest now."

Ciel only managed a displeased groan in reply. He didn't even have the strength to tell the demon off.

* * *

"Sebastian," a weak, yet demanding voice called.

It'd been only about half an hour since his asthma got under control. Still, his breathing was a little bit ragged and he occasionally coughed.

The butler appeared by his side immediately. "Yes, Master?" he asked.

Ciel slowly sit up, pushing away the covers. "We are leaving," he muttered, taking a few deep breaths as he felt slight chest pain again. "You have to help me dress properly and brush my hair…"

Sebastian looked at him with disbelief. "Master, just where do you intend to go in this condition? I must advise you to stay in bed, at least for a-" He was interrupted immediately.

"Don't… question me," replied the boy, his eyes narrowing. "This is an order. Help me get ready and take me to Bethlehem Lunatic Asylum."

"Yes, my Lord," agreed Sebastian, having no other choice.

* * *

The butler opened the door and picked Ciel up, getting him out of the carriage quickly.

"I could've done it myself," complained the boy weakly as he was put down on the ground, hating the fact that the demon saw him unable to do such a trivial little thing.

Sebastian just smirked in reply.

It snowed again, growing dark. Ciel couldn't help but remember the night he left this place. This time… He wasn't cold, though. Sebastian dressed him in a black winter coat with a furred hood, his stuffed rabbit sticking out from one of the pockets, and long laced boots, reaching his knees. He wasn't scared anymore. Ciel was not going to meet his death, just as he was not going to be tortured. He wasn't powerless anymore, because Sebastian was with him and he was going to take back what they had stripped him of – his dignity and pride.

"Let's go, Sebastian. Do not leave my side."

When they finally entered the building, they headed straight to the high-risk ward. Some patients, those a bit more aware of their surroundings, were looking at them.

A rush of the painful memories immediately haunted Ciel. The assault, torment, bloodletting, molesting, cold water, force-feeding and the shard of glass in his eye. His breath hitched and he subconsciously grabbed Sebastian's palm, looking for something to hold on to.

The demon, standing right behind him, looked at him and their now joined hands, appearing slightly surprised. His arms then circled around Ciel's body, giving him a reassuring embrace and a feeling of security, sensing this was just what Ciel wanted, but wasn't going to ask for. He leaned down, his mouth brushing Ciel's ear.

"Do not be afraid, my Lord. I will protect you," he promised, a grin appearing on his face, as he felt Ciel shiver upon hearing the words whispered straight into his ear.

A new voice suddenly interrupted the silence, and Ciel finally sobered up a bit. A light blush tinted his face when he noticed the position he was in, and he quickly escaped from the demon's clutch.

"Sir? Excuse me, do you need some help? Are you looking for someone?"

One of the younger nurses approached them, her gaze fixated entirely on Sebastian, not even noticing the boy.

Sebastian gave the woman one of his most dazzling smiles before answering.

"Thank you very much, Nurse, but we will manage. I am sure you must be very busy taking care of all the patients here…" he said, his tone full of admiration, looking her in the eyes.

The nurse giggled, covering mouth with her palm. "Oh, sir, you are too kind! Well, if there is anything you need my help with, please don't hesitate to ask, I will be close by!" she added eagerly and walked away, though it was obvious that she really wanted to talk to the butler more.

Ciel shook his head in disbelief, not commenting, and started to walk through the ward. When he finally heard the well-known voices, he abruptly stopped by one of the rooms, opening the door and taking a quick look inside.

The demon immediately sensed Ciel's fear. He didn't even have to ask; he knew from the boy's expression that they'd just found exactly whom they were looking for.

"I will protect you from them, Master," he said softly, once again.

Ciel turned around and looked at him for a long moment, seeming much less tense. "I know," he murmured, suddenly averting his gaze. "Just… don't leave my side." When Sebastian whispered a silent 'yes, my Lord' into his ear, he went inside.

Hawk and Ray were in the process of restraining a young male patient to the bed. Hearing the noise, they both looked at the doorway. Recognition appeared on their faces immediately.

"Well, well, well… If it isn't our little dollybird!" Hawk exclaimed with a laugh. "Your family brought you back here, hmm?" he smirked unpleasantly.

"We missed you so much, baby kitten!" added Ray, teasingly.

Sebastian walked in after Ciel, finally appearing in the doorway. The orderlies exchanged annoyed glances.

"Good evening, sir, may I help?" asked Hawk, his tone of the voice completely different now. "Here to admit Ciel again? I can bring the papers and…"

He was interrupted. Sebastian chuckled, observing the man. "I don't think that will be necessary."

"What the hell do you want, then?" the orderly groaned, approaching them.

The boy instinctively took a step back and bumped into Sebastian. The demon steadied him, so he wouldn't fall over. It was painfully obvious; that child was a bundle of nerves.

"Remember my promise, Master," Sebastian murmured to him patiently.

Ciel suddenly turned around, and standing on his tiptoes, whispered something into the demon's ear.

Sebastian smiled wickedly and stood in front of Ciel, effectively not allowing the orderlies to come any closer to him.

"My Master told me that you both just _love_ to play," he said, his tone filled with fake curiosity and mockery. "And he wants to play right now."

"What? What are you talking-"

The man didn't get to finish the sentence, as a knife thrown by the demon slashed his cheek, leaving a bleeding line across it.

"In this game, you play the patients," the demon informed them carelessly.

He picked some additional restraints off the floor and approached the orderlies.

"What the fuck are you doing, bastard!" Hawk lunged at the demon.

Sebastian, with a bored expression on his face, effortlessly caught the orderly's arm in a death grip, twisting it hard. A sickening sound of bones being broken and a yell echoed in the room. He then began to bind his hands together, using the leather restraints, and threw him to the floor.

Ray clearly wasn't eager to help as he stood by and watched, fear portrayed on his face.

"I wouldn't suggest trying to attract attention with too much noise… It may end up badly," cheerfully warned the demon, as he quickly overpowered the second orderly, restraining him in the same way.

"Do you think you scare me, you psycho?" Hawk laughed but it sounded fake. "I deal with freaks like you every day!"

Ciel took a few steps forward, standing right in front of the two restrained orderlies sitting on the floor. He looked at them with pure hatred, wanting nothing more than make them pay for everything.

Seeing him, Hawk immediately grimaced, trying to spit at Ciel. Sebastian gracefully managed to move Ciel just in time to save him from the fluid.

"You shameless psychotic whore, just who do you think you are?" Hawk growled with annoyance. "Disgusting little slut, do you let that bodyguard of yours fuck you in return for protection? I wouldn't be surprised; after all, you enjoy getting a dick up your dirty ass," he laughed, satisfied upon seeing Ciel's expression, wanting nothing more than to upset him.

The boy did not reply, but the hand in his pocket clutched the rabbit doll. His breathing, once again, was slightly uneven. Sebastian narrowed his eyes slightly, hearing the orderly's comment, and then briefly stared at Ciel. He didn't do anything yet, waiting for an order.

"Do you think some petty revenge will change things?" Hawk said, his voice full of contempt. "Do you think it will make you _pure_ again?" he started laughing cruelly. "I will never forget how you were moaning, just like a street prostitute when we took turns with you."

Ciel just stood there, unmoving, still watching both men. He was completely unaware of the fact that a trail of tears made its way down his left cheek. Because his right eye was covered, it was impossible to see the tears escaping from it. He felt utterly humiliated; there was no reason for his butler to know what they did to him, he didn't _want_ him to know, and the words once again brought back all the painful memories.

He remembered not being able to breathe because his face was being pushed into the pillow. The words making him feel even more sick and embarrassed and the pleasured grunts as he cried from the pain. And the touches, the man's hand on him, making him feel what he didn't want to feel, shaming him. For a second, he could swear that he felt something warm, something more than only his blood, running down the inner sides of his thighs again, tainting him forever.

Sebastian, not liking the sudden change of situation, turned to Ciel. The boy's gaze was unfocused and glassy, as if he was seeing something different to everyone else. Sebastian took out a handkerchief from his pocket, gently wiping away the tears from Ciel's face. Wanting to get his attention and help him snap out of the flashback as soon as possible, he took Ciel_'s_ hands in his and kneeled down, so their heads were almost at the same level.

"Master," he probed, his voice calm and comforting. "Remember my promise. I will protect you," he gave the palms a little squeeze. "Give me an order, Master."

Ciel suddenly blinked, looking as if he had just woken up from a long slumber. Eying the demon and their joined hands, he felt like he was having a déjà vu moment, because something similar already occurred about half an hour ago.

"Sebastian," he muttered, barely audibly, seeming completely oblivious to the surroundings.

"That bitch is totally insane, didn't I tell you? Just look!" yelled Hawk, trying to get the restraints off him, without any results. Ray nodded, silently agreeing with him.

Ciel squirmed away from the demon's grasp in reflex, shocked at the sudden outburst. Suddenly, he seemed much more aware and focused as his gaze landed on the orderly.

"We got into trouble cause of your weakness; they blamed that vampire freak's escape on us! We might get fired cause of you! Are you even conscious, you mad slut? Just what-"

Ciel had tears in his eyes again and he hated himself for it. It wasn't supposed to be like this. He was supposed to _never_ cry again. His hands trembled, and he just couldn't stand those words anymore, they were like knives piercing his pride.

"Sebastian, shut him up!" he shrieked.

"Yes, my Lord," the demon, who was now standing by his side, leered.

As Sebastian approached the orderlies, he leaned down, looking straight into Hawk's eyes. He snapped his fingers, covered by the white gloves and took a step back. All of the sudden, the sickish sound of a jaw being broken and a loud gasp rippled throughout the room. Hawk, coughing and sputtering, to his own horror started to throw up blood, mixed with sharp silver pins.

"Oh God," whispered Ray in terror, observing his friend with shock and fear. There weren't any breaks between his vomiting, like there usually were, and a large pool of red liquid, filled with pins, formed on the floor. "What… are you?" He stared at Sebastian with disbelief.

Sebastian tilted his head slightly, observing him, before a sneer graced his face. "Me? I am merely one hell of a butler," he chuckled, coming a bit closer to him.

Ciel watched the vomiting orderly with satisfaction, but also with disgust. The scene made him feel rather lightheaded. Still, he couldn't help but want to laugh at Sebastian's choice of words.

"Master, this patient is also rather delusional." Sebastian pointed to the second orderly, Ray. "What treatment would you suggest?" he asked, his tone extremely serious and devoted, as he turned to Ciel.

"Bloodletting," murmured Ciel quietly, the shadow of a victorious smile on his lips.

"N-no, please, I-"

"Very well, Master," interrupted Sebastian.

The demon grasped Ray's palms with an unpleasant expression on his face.

"These hands of yours…" he began, seemingly deep in thought. "They touched something they shouldn't have, am I right?" he murmured.

Pure terror appeared on the orderly's face.

Sebastian, without a doubt amused, leaned closer and whispered into his ear. "I should do what I'm about to do to a different part of your body but I doubt that my Master would wish to see it."

Before Ray had even the chance to process his words, he noticed something shiny in the butler's hand. Something that looked disturbingly similar… His scream was muffled by a dirty rag, which suddenly appeared in his mouth. …_To a cleaver._ For a second, he could see _so much _blood and white bones, protruding from the places where once would have been his… Oh Jesus. His hands were on the ground, cut off.

He fainted.

Ciel's eye, watching the scene, widened, and he immediately covered his mouth with his fingers, trying not to be sick.

"I'm sorry, Master. Was that too much?" Sebastian asked when he noticed the boy's reaction. He reached for his handkerchief again, and nonchalantly wiped the blood staining his gloves.

Ciel just shook his head slowly, trying to get a grip on himself. This was only right. They deserved it. He wanted to make them pay.

"Do you still wish to go along with the plan or would you like me to…?"

Ciel didn't let him finish. "I will do it," he said, trying to make his voice sound firm.

"As you wish, my Lord." Sebastian bowed his head and stepped back.

Ciel crouched down and appeared to fiddle with one of his laced boots. After a few seconds, he took out a knife, previously attached to a brown belt and hidden by the boots, whose job was to hold up his black stockings.

He approached Hawk, who was now slumped against the wall by the puddle of blood, almost resting in it. He had finally stopped vomiting, but was very pale. His gaze was on Ciel, eyes begging for mercy, though if one looked closer, hatred was evident in them as well.

"Where… should I…" Ciel broke off, nibbling at his bottom lip nervously.

"May I assist you, Young Master?" suggested the demon kindly, closing the distance between him and Ciel.

When Ciel nodded, Sebastian's hand closed around his, holding the knife. Ciel could feel a light pressure on his back, as Sebastian was right behind him.

"I suggest… here." Sebastian guided their hands to the man's neck, to emphasize the point. "What do you think, my Lord?"

"Okay," murmured silently Ciel, feeling his palm tremble slightly. He was pretty sure he would miss the target without Sebastian's aid. "On three then," he whispered. "Three…"

His gaze was locked on the man's begging eyes but he didn't feel an ounce of pity. Only hatred. He wanted to crush him, to make him disappear along with Ciel's own memories. This whole situation was stressing him, but still, he couldn't deny that he felt somehow… Thrilled.

"Two…" he continued counting, getting ready, and shifting his arm a little bit.

Hawk desperately tried to say something, but the broken jaw made it impossible, and so he only managed an incoherent sound.

"_One_," Ciel and Sebastian whispered together, Ciel's voice slightly breathy and anxious, Sebastian's amused.

With a little help, Ciel's arm was brought down in one swift movement, stabbing into a critical point of the orderly's throat; an artery. Blood seemed to spray everywhere; on the ground, on their clothes, and on their faces. It was too much for Ciel. A choking sound escaped his lips and he yanked his hand away. He managed to walk away a few steps before he fell on his knees and threw up.

"Oh my," murmured Sebastian. "Perhaps stabbing his chest would have been better. Surely, less dirty. On the other hand, at least now we look like we fit into this place," he smirked, looking at Ciel. "Are you better now, Master?"

Ciel slowly stood up, trying not to look at the red substance, smeared everywhere. "Kill the other one," he whispered quietly. "Then, take the that man's restraints off." He briefly glanced at the wide-eyed patient, still chained to the bed. "And dirty his hands with their blood. Leave the knife here," he ordered, hardly audible. "And then… There is another thing we need to do."

* * *

The door made an unpleasant squeaking sound as they entered. The doctor, sitting at the desk and gazing at some files, looked up.

"Ciel?" he exclaimed, clearly shocked. "What in the God's name happened? Are you alright?" he stood up.

"Don't come any further," Ciel warned, instinctively getting closer to Sebastian.

The psychiatrist complied, not moving, but his gaze was still fixated on the boy.

"Ciel, whose blood is it? Are you injured? Do you need help?" he asked, forcing his voice to sound calm and collected.

"Shut up," whispered Ciel, averting his eyes. "_I am_ Earl Ciel Phantomhive. Do you believe me now?"

To Ciel's fury, the man completely ignored his statement. "You don't look too well, Ciel. Are your symptoms worse?" When Doctor Dosett didn't hear the reply, he turned to Sebastian. "Sir, what happened? Is Ciel-"

"I told you to shut the hell up!" Ciel snapped angrily, though his voice was trembling a little bit. His hand subconsciously hid inside the coat's pocket, grasping the rabbit. "It's all your fault! Your stupid treatments made me like this! You have no idea what you've done to me!" he shouted, but the tone was more hysterical than anything else. "Your orderlies…" he continued, now much quieter, much more broken. "You _let_ them," he choked finally, feeling tears in his eyes just by thinking about it all again.

The psychiatrist looked at him, horrified, a sudden realization on his face. "Ciel, you can't mean-" Once again, he didn't get to finish the sentence.

"I can't stand it anymore! Sebastian, kill him!" Ciel finally lost it, screaming the order.

He gasped for breath as the asthma attack threatened to relapse. Before Sebastian had a chance to answer, Ciel felt a sudden dizziness and nausea. His vision got blurred, nothing seemed clear. His knees went weak. The demon reacted quickly, catching him in a mid-fall and lifted him up. Ciel, barely conscious, wrapped his arms around Sebastian's neck, desperately needing something to hold on to, afraid that if he let go, he would collapse again.

"Yes, my Lord," said Sebastian finally; the silent words reaching Ciel's ears only.

"Ciel, what's wrong?" the psychiatrist spoke again, looking at the boy, concerned. "Talk to me, Ciel. I will help you," he promised. "Who is this man?"

Ciel's body was shivering slightly, his eye wide open, staring at the psychiatrist. He still was on the verge of fainting and everything seemed to be spinning, making him feel even more dizzy and weak. He then felt Sebastian's hand come up, covering his eyes. Somehow, Ciel found the darkness comforting. He let his body relax in the demon's arms.

There was a loud, disturbing noise, but Ciel couldn't identify what exactly it was, nor did he want to_._ Then there was silence, giving out more than any words would.

He felt Sebastian moving to the door, the sound of footsteps unnaturally loud. The demon's gloved palm was still covering his eyes until they walked out of the room.

* * *

The carriage started moving. Ciel was barely able to uphold himself in a sitting position. He couldn't help but lean against the demon.

He believed that everything would change after _their _punishment. It seemed ridiculous but he almost expected things to go back to normal, to how they used to be upon completing this task. Still… Nothing seemed to be really different. His heart felt strangely anesthetized and empty.

"Comfort me," he muttered, his voice slightly hoarse. He didn't really care now if the demon saw him as weak.

Sebastian seemed to think for a moment, a look of mild surprise in his eyes. Well, comforting human children was never his day-to-day task, so he had every reason to be unsure about it. Perhaps he could… No, perhaps not. It was only human adults that sometimes preferred that kind of comfort. In this case, some gentleness and care would probably do just fine.

Ciel felt Sebastian's touch on him. He didn't protest, letting the demon lay him down on the side, his head resting on demon's lap. He was far too exhausted and still in shock to care. Sebastian's hand brushed his face and then forehead.

"You have a fever, Master," the demon said quietly, as if not wanting to disturb him with too much noise. He began to gently stroke Ciel's hair with his fingers.

"I don't feel too well," Ciel sighed softly, letting his eyelids fall. "But at least… I won," he added weakly.

Sebastian chuckled. "I have a feeling that Master hates losing in all kinds of games."

"I never lose," mumbled Ciel.


	7. Chapter 6

_AU: Hello everyone! Thank you very much for all the feedback, I really appreciate it! Please, continue to review, your opinions are important to me._

_And, of course, my Beta deserves flowers for working so hard on this chapter. Thank you! _

* * *

_He was there again, amongst the many types of trees, standing close to the pond filled with colorful lilies. He could see his reflection. Once again, he was wearing the same light blue outfit, with the apron and black and white striped stockings. And his physical appearance… His eyes, bright and shining, unharmed, unmarred. His skin; porcelain perfection, no signs of black stiches on his neck, nor bruises. He felt completely at peace here, nothing seemed to matter, as if all his problems had been taken away from him. In fact, he couldn't even recall what they were anymore._

_He turned around when he suddenly heard a chuckle. A large black cat sat beside him, smiling at him with sharp canine teeth._

"_Hello there," the creature spoke in a deep, male voice, his gaze never leaving Ciel._

_Ciel looked at him with disbelief. "You... talk?" he asked ineloquently. _

_The cat waggled its tail angrily, clearly offended. "Well, what does it look like I'm doing?" he huffed with annoyance._

_A light blush tinted Ciel's cheeks before he spoke again. "I was just surprised," he muttered, giving the animal an unpleasant glance. "Who are you?"_

_The cat hummed, grinning at him again. "I'm The Cat. And I have a message for you," he announced. "Two, in fact. Firstly-"_

_Ciel interrupted him. "Messages? What kind of messages? From whom?" he demanded the answers, confused and frustrated._

_The Cat snarled his teeth, looking as if he was about to attack. "I was just about to tell you what kind of messages they are!" he snapped angrily. "Must you interrupt?!"_

_Ciel crossed his arms, turning his head away. "Fine, tell me then." His foot was now tapping the ground._

_The Cat, proudly holding his chin up, recited, "'Memories define our lives and they renew us. Collect them, nurture them and experience forgotten, never was'," As he recited, his whiskers moving slightly. "__'Forgetting pain is convenient. Remembering it, agonizing. But recovering the truth is worth the suffering."*_

_For a second, something in Ciel's eyes changed. There was a sudden recognition and understanding there, but most of all: unimaginable pain and guilt. As soon as they appeared, however, those emotions were gone, leaving only puzzlement and disorientation in Ciel's gaze. _

"_That's rrright…" purred The Cat, noticing his first reaction. It looked as if he was talking to himself only. "Your Other Self remembered, if only for a second…" _

"_Other… Self…?" slowly repeated Ciel. "Remembered what? What do you mean?" he asked again, his tone of the voice confused. "I don't understand." He appeared utterly lost, his eyes wide, looking at the animal._

_The Cat stared at him with what seemed to be pity. He sighed, licking his paw and scratching his pointy ear. "If you follow the guidance from the first message, you will find out, one day," he replied. Before Ciel had a chance to respond to that, he spoke again. "This is another message. Listen carefully. On the bottom of the pond, there is an item, which you need to obtain."_

_Ciel kept looking at him, as if expecting some more information._

"_Well, what are you gaping at? There is nothing else I have to say to you. Bye." _

"_Wait! I-"_

_The Cat grinned at him again, before disappearing._

_Ciel sighed, the cat's words still on his mind. Not having anything else to do, he approached the pond and carefully stepped into the water. After taking a few steps, he discovered it wasn't deep. He was in the middle of it and the water wasn't even reaching his thighs. Determined to find the item The Cat told him about, he kneeled, his hands wandering under the surface. He hissed when something sharp suddenly cut his finger. It appeared that he had finally found something. His palm reached out for the item, taking it out from the water._

_It was a large blade._

* * *

Everything blurred in a matter of seconds.

"Master?"

He heard a voice, but it wasn't very clear – he couldn't even make out what it was saying. He felt hands on him; touches trying to shake him back into consciousness.

"My Lord, can you hear me?"

Did that sound like concern? He wasn't sure. Something brushed against his cheek, trying to get his attention again. His palm instinctively reached out, wanting to hold on to the comforting touch.

"Master, what's wrong?"

Ciel suddenly realized that his eye was wide open and that he could see again. Sighing with relief, he noticed that he was still in the carriage, his head on the demon's lap. He was now staring at the pale face hovering over him, his butler's dark hair tickling his face. And his hand was wrapped around the demon's wrist tightly. He let go, slowly, almost as if unwillingly.

"I had… Such a strange dream," he murmured finally. "At first everything was so perfect, but then that cat said something that for a second-"

Sebastian interrupted him, his eyebrows furrowing slightly. "Master, you weren't asleep," he said carefully, as if not wanting to upset the boy.

Ciel looked at him, not understanding. "What do you mean by that? Of course I was, I was dreaming," he mumbled, semi-coherently.

Sebastian just shook his head, but didn't argue with him. Ciel felt Sebastian's gentle hand beginning to stroke his hair again, attempting to calm him down.

"It's okay, Master," the demon assured him, his voice even and soothing. "There is nothing to worry about. It was probably caused by the fever and shock; you went through something traumatic today," he told Ciel.

"No," protested Ciel, suddenly seeming panicked. He tried to get up, but the butler didn't let him, forcing him to stay in place. "Something's wrong. That cat said that I must recover the truth and my Other Self remembered what happened," he was muttering again, his voice tired and slurred, words barely understandable. "And for a second it was so-"

Sebastian covered his lips with his hand, effectively silencing the other. "Shh," he murmured quietly. "Please, calm down, my Lord. Everything is going to be okay. Don't worry," he repeated again. "You really need to rest now. You must be exhausted."

Ciel nodded his head slowly, listening to the demon's words, finding them and his touches oddly comforting. There was no point in thinking about that 'dream' anymore. It was probably just like he said, tiredness and illness made him imagine it all.

"That's it. Just relax."

The demon's hand shifted, now covering his eyes.

"Go to sleep, Master. Don't think about anything now. _Sleep_."

That whispering voice was hypnotizing him, clawing its way straight into his mind, and commanding his body to shut down. He welcomed it; it was giving him comfort.

* * *

As Ciel woke up, he didn't know whether hours or simply minutes had passed since they came back. After quickly washing him and changing his clothes, Sebastian put him to bed. Ciel sighed, feeling the cozy quilt covering him and the fur of the stuffed rabbit that he held to his chest. His mind seemed hazy, his vision blurred. He heard Sebastian in the background, moving around, his footsteps mixed with the wood cracking in the fireplace and his own, unhealthy, erratic heartbeat.

He shivered when he suddenly felt a cold, wet rag being placed on his forehead. Still, he didn't find it reason enough to open his eye. He was too exhausted.

"Sebastian," he murmured weakly.

"Yes, Master?" replied the demon immediately, his tone, as always, devoted and serious.

Ciel shifted a bit, getting more comfortable. "Don't leave," he muttered finally, his voice scratchy and tired. He was shivering badly, despite being covered under the warm blanket. All his limbs felt heavy and his muscles ached. "Sit," he commanded, as if speaking to a dog.

"As you wish, my Lord," answered simply Sebastian and sat on the bed, close to him.

Ciel seemed relieved when he felt the mattress shift slightly under the demon's weight. He seemed to fight an inner battle for a moment, as if thinking if he should speak or not. He decided to do so, after all.

"The Asylum…" he started slowly, his voice sounding very weak. "Was my second hell," he added, keeping his uncovered eye closed. "I escaped the members of the occult once." He didn't know why he was saying this but he felt like he _had to_. Maybe it was just the fever talking.

"I know, Master," said Sebastian suddenly, his voice void of emotions.

Ciel's eyelid partially lifted. He stared at the demon with confusion. "How?" he mumbled finally, licking his lips that all of the sudden seemed dry.

Sebastian helped him sit up and placed a glass of cold water to his mouth, forcing him to drink at least a little bit, trying to prevent dehydration. After completing this task and making Ciel lay down again, he answered.

"You were meant to summon me two years ago, Master," the demon said, placing the now empty glass on the nightstand.

"W-what? Why didn't I, then?" Ciel didn't understand, and the mere thought of it all made him feel even worse. Is it possible that he could've escaped all the suffering he went through for the past two years?

"It's… A bit complicated. Perhaps-"

"Explain!" demanded Ciel, his voice a bit louder.

"That night you were supposed to be killed," started explaining the demon. "You'd call me to you then, exactly like you did a few days ago. But you escaped from them. Still, you were often very close to summoning me… There was that time when you felt so much hatred, directed at everything, especially God, but-"

Ciel interrupted him. "When?" he asked quietly.

Sebastian looked as if he wasn't sure whether or not he should answer but he did. "When you were being raped, Master," he said, his tone calm and emotionless.

A pained expression appeared on Ciel's face for a short moment but he forced himself _not to remember. _"What went wrong then?" he asked, trying not to sound shaken up.

"You gave up, my Lord," Sebastian said simply. "You allowed your mind to shut down for a while."

Ciel took a deep breath, trying to calm himself. "I see," he whispered finally. "It was my own damn stupidity then. If I only were to discard those stupid delusions about the almighty God earlier, I wouldn't have to go through half of all those things," he added, his voice getting slightly hysterical.

"Perhaps you just needed a right trigger," suggested Sebastian. "And being on the verge of death _was_ that trigger, Master."

Ciel chuckled humorlessly, feeling even more exhausted than before. "I was just weak and naive. I'm not anymore, though." He couldn't help but yawn; the talk seemed to tire him out completely.

Sebastian, noticing this, commented. "You should sleep some more, Young Master. You need to rest as much as possible."

"Fine," murmured dryly the boy, briefly glancing at the demon. "Stay until I fall asleep," he ordered.

"Yes, my Lord."

"Sebastian," sighed Ciel weakly after a few minutes of silence, not even fully aware what he was saying anymore. "I want the mansion back…"

* * *

_His blood was dripping on the marble floor, slowly, without any rush, drop by drop. His wrists were bleeding, the deep cuts made by lancet slowly draining life from him. He couldn't move, the leather brown restraints painfully preventing him from enforcing movement. It was difficult to breathe; the air too heavy and musty._

_The blindfold covering his blue eyes made him even more panicked._

"_My pretty… perfect… broken little doll…"_

_The husky whisper made him shiver. A cold hand was on his lips now, three fingers slowly crawling their way into his mouth._

"_You have been misbehaving again…"_

_A fearful whimper escaped him as rough hands violently caressed his thighs with fingernails, leaving red bleeding marks, and then spread them apart._

"_So, so naughty."_

_The sudden pressure made him lose his breath, together with all his senses. And pain, pain, pain._

Ciel woke up with a gasp, his eye frantically looking around the bedroom, his breathing still ragged. Before he could open his mouth to call him, Sebastian already appeared in the doorway. The demon was holding a candleholder with seven candles placed upon it. They immediately lightened the room, bathing the walls in a soft yellow glow.

"A nightmare?" questioned emotionlessly the dark haired male, his gaze scrutinizing Ciel from head to tone, immediately noticing all the signs of distress and the unhealthy flush on his cheeks.

Ciel simply nodded his head, trying to calm down. A cool palm on his forehead made him jump slightly. Sebastian's expression changed a little, but it was impossible to tell whether it was concern or something else.

"Your fever is worse, Master," said the demon, still looking at him. "Please, give me your permission to call for a doctor," he added.

"I… hate doctors…" muttered Ciel in a slurred voice. His gaze was hazy and unfocused. He felt absolutely horrible.

"I know, my Lord, but you are ill," replied patiently Sebastian, placing a new wet cloth on the boy's forehead.

Ciel sighed softly, finding this action comforting. He let his eyelid fall again.

"Do whatever you want…" he murmured uncaringly. "I won't let him touch me, though," he continued, semi-coherently. "They are… all liars."

Shortly after, before Sebastian could even leave the room, Ciel passed out again. By the time the doctor arrived, he was still unconscious, and to Sebastian's delight, there was no need to coax the boy into letting the doctor examine him.

The doctor removed the stethoscope from Ciel's chest and placed it back into his large leather bag. He then put his finger on the boy's neck, at the same time looking at his silver pocket watch, measuring the pulse.

"He is very weak," he announced finally. "The heartbeat is too fast and erratic, and that puts additional strain on the body; his heart clearly has trouble coping with the illness. His breathing pattern also suggests that the disease is already quite advanced. I'm afraid this is yet another case of pneumonia."

"I see," replied Sebastian, standing close by and observing. He seemed deep in thought. "How to cure it then?" he asked.

The doctor shrugged, his eyes scrutinizing Ciel's fragile, unconscious form once again. "There isn't much that can be done for him now," he sighed. "I can recommend that he rests a lot. Stress also may worsen his condition so, if possible, he should be kept as calm as possible. You may keep trying to lower his body temperature, and perhaps he could also use some change of air, as well as bloodletting," he suggested.

Sebastian had to force himself not to show his annoyance. It was clear to him: the man did not have a clue how to cure that illness. Bloodletting. How he almost wanted to laugh at it. As if cutting someone up and letting the precious life fluid go to waste would help anybody with the infection. He couldn't believe how stupid humans were. It was obvious that bloodletting was only going to make a person weaker.

"Still," the doctor continued. "I would not get my hopes up, there is a chance that the boy will die because he is in a really bad condition. The prognosis is unfavorable in his state. Please, also keep in mind that delirium may supervene. It is always a serious symptom and its appearance will suggest that the patient's condition has worsened."

Die? Sebastian grimaced slightly. How problematic. No, that was most certainly unacceptable. He couldn't let that happen to his unprepared meal _now, _when he finally had him in his demonic grasp, after two years of being haunted by him, waiting to be finally called.

"I understand," the demon replied, wanting to get rid off the human as quickly as possible.

* * *

It's been almost two days since the doctor left and Ciel's condition only got worse. He was waking up for short moments only, most of the time completely oblivious to everything. His body was often tormented with a fit of hacking coughs. Despite Sebastian's efforts, the fever didn't go down. Ciel was constantly shivering, now covered only by a thin sheet to help get his temperature down.

The demon, standing by the bed, shifted slightly, his hand checking Ciel's pulse. He was displeased after finding it even weaker than before, though still very irregular. To him, the vulnerability of human bodies was astonishing; it was hard to believe how quickly their condition could go from just fine to critical.

Now being that close to the boy, he couldn't help but lean down slightly, his face close to Ciel's. It was that smell. Completely, inarguably _intoxicating_. He was attracted to that fragrance like a bee to honey; it was drawing him.

Ciel smelled of death.

And it was allowing the demon to sense Ciel's dark yet absolutely pure soul even easier than always, just like when a predator can smell and feel his pray in the open. It was just like an invitation; a body slowly giving up, a soul so close to leaving it.

How tempting it was, to just think of breaking the contract and devouring the soul now.

Just as his hand instinctively touched Ciel's face, titling it slightly, Ciel chose this moment to wake up.

Ciel's blue, hazy and glassy gaze turned to a frightened one as it landed on Sebastian, who was leaning over him, his face so close to Ciel's and his touch on Ciel's skin.

The look on the demon's face was showing surprise; he didn't move for a moment. He almost chuckled. How reckless of him. He was so absorbed in worshipping his meal that he didn't even notice it was regaining consciousness.

"What… the hell are do you think you're doing, Sebastian?" finally rasped Ciel, his voice filled with panic.

The demon quickly composed himself and moved away immediately.

"Pardon me, Master, I was just-"

Ciel didn't let him finish, still looking at him with mistrust and shock.

"You were what?" he hissed, trying to hide the trembling in his voice, his hand grasping the sheets harder. "This is an order! Explain what you were trying to do to me! Don't you dare lie!" he demanded, trying to suppress the cough.

Sebastian sighed slightly. How… awkward. Well, an order is an order and there was nothing he could do about it. Still, the mere fact of being _caught _and having to admit to his actionwas taking away some of his pride.

"I was sniffing you, my Lord," he said at last, clearly not willingly.

The fright in Ciel's eye changed to disbelief. "What? Are you," he coughed, "serious? Why? Would you do something so… stupid? Are you mad?" he asked, looking at his butler with puzzlement and suspicion.

"Simply because you smell even better than usually, Master. And I just… couldn't resist," answered Sebastian. He couldn't help but grin at the boy's expression. Who would've thought that such a simple action would ruin Ciel's usual cold and emotionless demeanor.

Ciel sat up and just shook his head but it was impossible to not see how relieved he was. When he saw Sebastian hovering over him like that, in such a close proximity, it frightened him and brought back past memories. But now, the demon's explanation amused him.

"You mean my soul," he muttered, almost wanting to laugh. "You scared me," he admitted after a second. "Why would you suddenly…" he broke off abruptly, a sudden look on realization on his face.

Sebastian was silent, standing close to the bed.

"I think I get it," Ciel chuckled weakly, not an ounce of humor in his voice. His eyes narrowed slightly, clearly in fury. "What kind of butler are you? Your Master is almost laying on his deathbed and you, like a damn vulture, are just waiting for him to kick the damn bucket," he hissed.

Of course, he knew from the start what the demon was after, but the fact that the demon showed it in such a way, when he was so ill and suffering, angered Ciel immensely. How _dare_ he?

Ciel's hand suddenly grabbed Sebastian's collar harshly, and without any hesitation pulled him closer, so that their faces were almost touching. "You better get a good last sniff, because if I ever see you doing that again, you are going to pay for it, you damned dog!" he growled in rage, his voice hoarse.

Sebastian's expression was unreadable. He licked his lips in a teasing manner before answering. "Yes, my Lord."

"You still have the nerve to mock me?" Ciel gasped with rage, stopping himself from ripping the butler to pieces. "Does my illness really amuse you that much?" he snarled, finally letting go of the demon and looking at him with hatred.

"No, Master. Only your attitude does," Sebastian replied, in a voice void of any emotions. He fixed the collar of his shirt, making it look perfect once again. "Please, try to calm down and rest some more, that's the doctor's recommendation," he added.

Ciel stared at him, clearly surprised, forgetting about his anger for a moment. "The doctor was already here? What did he say?" he murmured.

"Almost two days ago, you were still unconscious. He diagnosed you with severe pneumonia, my Lord. As for the treatment, he suggested bloodletting and a change of air," the demon explained, sounding skeptic and not even hiding it. "Perhaps you would like me to find another, more competent doctor who could advise another, more accurate treatment?" he offered.

"No, they are all useless anyway," sighed Ciel uncaringly. He lay down again, suddenly tired. The whole situation exhausted him.

"Are you sure, Master? That doctor said that you may die because-"

Ciel interrupted him. "I already said no. Don't make me repeat myself."

"As you wish, my Lord." Sebastian bowed his head slightly.

Ciel looked at him for a moment before he spoke again. "There is no way you will get to eat my soul if I die now, I won't allow it because I didn't survive all this just to die of some stupid disease," he murmured firmly, a note of annoyance in his voice. "I refuse to die until I obtain my revenge. So, this is an order, Sebastian. Don't let me die now," he commanded.

"Very well, Master. I shall prepare you a meal now, to help you get better soon."

* * *

Ciel didn't want to admit it, but the illness frightened him. It felt as if he was getting weaker with every hour, and he didn't know how to stop it. In front of Sebastian, he was pretending that he wasn't concerned in the slightest, but in reality he found himself very lost. He was cold; he couldn't stop shivering even though a thick quilt covered him now. He also had trouble taking deep breaths and his chest hurt mercilessly. Not to mention the muscle aches, the weakness, and the constant nausea.

He brought his hand to his mouth, covering it as another fit of violent coughing began. He hated it; it was both painful and tiring. When it finally subsided, he took his palm away, his eye widening in horror.

_Red_. His palm was covered in blood.

He immediately felt a rush of panic. What if he was really going to die? It wasn't normal to cough up blood, and he knew it. What was going to happen if he actually _did_ die? Panic turned to anger. _No_. He couldn't. It was impossible. He had only started to make things right, it was only the beginning. His hand grasped the sheet tightly, and he nibbled on his bottom lip subconsciously. God, it would be pathetic, to survive this much, only to meet death days after regaining freedom. He wouldn't let go of life. His hatred was too strong to let go of it.

Ciel pushed away the covers and grabbed the stuffed rabbit doll, hugging it to his chest. He then slowly got up from the bed. He wasn't going to depend on that demon all the time, he didn't need him now. Especially after the earlier occurrences. For a short second he saw black spots in front of him, but he figured it was because he stood up too quickly. Swaying a little bit, he began to make his way to the washroom. When he finally walked through the dark corridor and entered it, he was out of breath. He couldn't believe how exhausted he was, just because of such a trivial action.

He stood by the sink, washing away the blood from his hand. Listening to the running water, he stared at his reflection. How horrible… He looked like death was really just around the corner. So, so pale, and his right eye was obstructed by a dark shadow, even though he had slept for so long. It seemed like he had lost weight again, despite Sebastian's efforts, for his cheekbones were more prominent again, almost as if ready to protrude from his porcelain skin and cut it.

Suddenly, he felt very dizzy and he had to clutch the sink with both his hands to hold himself up. The rabbit toy fell to the floor. His breathing was erratic again and he felt his stomach turning. The nausea suddenly worsened and he vomited into the basin. When he finally stopped, he couldn't help but grimace with disgust. He splashed his face with cold water, closing his eyes for a moment. He was certain now; he wasn't going to make it back to his bedroom, he had no strength left. Feelings his legs go even weaker, he clumsily slumped down, sitting on the cold tiles and leaning against the wall.

How pathetic. He absolutely loathed his own weakness. He was supposed to be working on his revenge now, and there he was, shaking, curled up on the floor, unable to even get up. He almost felt like crying when he felt sick once again. When was this torment going to end?

He only managed to turn to the side slightly, before he started throwing up. Coughing, sputtering, and choking. It was absolutely awful. It even sounded terrible, and his throat hurt so much more now.

He wiped his mouth with a hand without thinking, his teary, unfocused gaze locked upon the puddle of vomit. Red. Red. _Red_. Crimson, thick _blood_.

He didn't know how he felt anymore. Was it resignation or fear? He couldn't tell.

The chest pain was unbearable now, and so was the tiredness. Still, he attempted to get up, only to collapse a second later. Giving up, he lay on his side, away from the vomit, his cheek pressed to the cold tile, his whole form trembling.

His stared at the wall, his gaze glassy and unfocused. It seemed to be moving… Closer to him, and then far away. All colors appeared to mix together. Everything around him blurred and seemed to be spinning, making his head hurt. He tried to take a deep breath and failed.

He fainted again.

* * *

When Ciel's eye opened hours later, he found himself in bed; half covered by the quilt, the first few buttons of his nightshirt undone. He felt strange. He couldn't remember when he fell asleep or even what he was doing before that, as if someone wiped away his memories. He didn't even have the strength to attempt to sit up so he just lifted his head a little bit, looking around. He was in the bedroom… A sudden dizziness forced him to lay back again, letting his head fall to the pillow.

"Master, how do you feel?"

For a second, he didn't recognize the urgent voice, not until the demon stood close to the bed, staring at him. Ciel didn't know what to say, still dazed and confused.

"I… don't know," he murmured finally.

"You lost consciousness in the washroom," explained the demon, watching him carefully. "Can you remember, my Lord?"

"No…" Ciel whispered, his voice weak and tired, his hazy gaze fixed on Sebastian. He sighed softly. "I'm not getting better… Am I?" he mumbled, barely coherently.

Sebastian was silent for a moment, as if considering what he should say. "You should have stayed in bed and asked me for assistance," he replied finally. "It was pointless to overexert yourself and make your condition worse."

"Why?" Ciel asked quietly, a lost look on his voice. "Why am I not getting better…" he mumbled, as if not hearing Sebastian.

He suddenly heard a noise and quickly turned around. There was something running across the room. White and furry. Such a… well-known sight. Was he having a déjà vu moment?

"Sebastian! What… what is a rabbit doing here?" he exclaimed with disbelief, his eye widened with surprise.

Sebastian instinctively looked the same way, finding nothing. Not like he expected to, anyway. "Master, there is no rabbit," he explained patiently, turning his eyes to stare at Ciel again.

Ciel blinked, the adrenaline finally giving him enough strength to at least sit up. "But there was," he argued weakly, sounding more childish and stubborn than ever. "It's the same rabbit from before," he added confidently.

Sebastian's hand reached out to touch his forehead but before it could reach its destination, Ciel lashed out, violently slapping his palm away.

Ciel, absolutely horrified, was watching demon's hand, where in the place of fingernails, were black, long inhuman claws.

"Get away from me, you demon!" he shouted in fear.

Sebastian was looking at the boy, now without any puzzlement. It was obvious to him what was going on now. "Master, I was only going to check your temperature," he said calmly.

"No," hissed Ciel angrily, crawling away from him, to the corner of the bed. "Don't you dare touch me with those filthy claws!"

Sebastian stepped back, his gaze never leaving Ciel. "As you wish, my Lord," he answered quietly.

Ciel averted his gaze. In a matter of seconds, a hatred coughing fit came. It was far more painful than the others because his throat was very sore, and no matter how much he tried to suppress it, he just couldn't stop. He just wanted to crawl out of his skin, anything to escape it. When the cough finally ceased, after what seemed like ages to him, he saw blood on the snowy white sheets and the inner side of his hand.

Sebastian sighed, watching the scene in front of him. There was no denying it; Ciel was just keep getting worse, the disease slowly eating him away. Crimson eyes narrowed slightly. That wasn't right. The illness was consuming _his _meal from the inside out.

Before he could do anything, Ciel spoke, in a weak voice.

"I'm… going to…"

Ciel, even paler now, didn't finish the sentence. A wave of nausea assaulted him, and he leaned over the side of the bed, throwing up on the floor. When he finally stopped retching and gasping for breath, he noticed blood in the vomit. For a long moment, he just sat there, frozen, looking at it and not knowing what to do.

"It's alright, Master, I will take care of this immediately. Then I will help you wash up and change the sheets," quickly reassured Sebastian, trying his best not to let the boy get upset.

The demon walked away to the wardrobe, quickly finding the fresh white sheets.

"Do you still feel like you are going to be sick, Young Master?" he asked, closing the wardrobe. He turned around to look at Ciel, only to find him lay on the bed once again, completely unresponsive and passed out.

* * *

"Wake up, Young Master."

A firm yet gentle voice brought him back from the depths of nothingness. He knew he was asleep, but didn't have any dreams… He opened his eye groggily, staring at Sebastian, who was standing right next to his bed.

It was too bright. He grimaced, covering his eye with a palm, but couldn't even bring himself to speak. He felt so exhausted.

"There is a letter for you, my Lord. It's from the queen. Would you like me to read it to you?" asked Sebastian, watching to see his reaction.

To the demon's surprise, the boy didn't even flinch, as if not caring in the slightest.

Ciel sighed, not moving his hand away. "Just… briefly tell me what it says…" he muttered quietly.

Sebastian opened the letter and his eyes quickly skimmed the text, looking out for the most important details. "The Queen wants you to solve a new case. It involves a serial rapist with an unknown identity. Some of the victims claim to have seen him, though, and all the statements match. Apparently, he always wears a black coat and a white mask. All the rapes took place in London but in different areas," Sebastian said finally.

"I see…" murmured Ciel apathetically. "Maybe I will feel better soon so I will be able to…" he broke off abruptly, turning to his side, his back facing the demon. "I just want to sleep now," he whispered, letting his eyelids fall.

"My Lord, you should eat and drink something first," Sebastian insisted, still observing him. "If-"

Ciel didn't let him finish the sentence. "Leave," he muttered.

"Yes, my Lord," replied Sebastian, a hint of annoyance in his voice.

* * *

Hours later, Sebastian found himself next Ciel's bed again. Even from the distance, the intoxicating fragrance was impossible to ignore. To him, it was like the finest perfume. So sweet, tempting and simply… _Divine_.

The truth was, however, impossible to deny. Ciel was dying.

With every passing second, his death was closer. He was not going to get better because his body was far too weak to beat the disease; it already gave up.

The demon stared at the fragile looking body with pale skin; a living porcelain doll. So vulnerable. So easy to ruin, shatter and crush. If he'd only had his hands on the doll's neck now, putting the lightest pressure on it, it would unavoidably snap under his fingers.

He sensed Ciel's pain just as much as he could hear Ciel's pulse; weak, slow, irregular. His heart, almost like some pathetic dying butterfly, seemed on the verge of giving up, but still fought, barely fluttering.

Well, it looked like he couldn't wait any longer. As much as he enjoyed seeing the prey so helpless, completely left to his mercy… There was no way he could let his meal slip away from him, when he wasn't done with preparing it. It still lacked… certain ingredients, to make it even more perfect. And, of course, he had his Master's orders. And Master's orders were absolute.

Sebastian placed his hand close to his lips. In a matter of seconds, his sharp teeth bit deeply into the wrist, immediately spilling dark crimson blood. He sat on the edge of the bed and placed his palm on Ciel's shoulder, shaking him.

"Master, wake up," he said loudly, as the red fluid started making its way down his hand.

The noise and movement seemed to rouse the boy, because his eyelid lifted slightly, staring at Sebastian with confusion.

"What…" he whispered semi-coherently.

Sebastian brought his bleeding wrist to Ciel's slightly parted mouth without any hesitation. "Drink, my Lord," he commanded.

As soon as Ciel tasted the metallic liquid, he tried to move his head. The demon made it impossible, not letting him. The feeling of being trapped made Ciel feel even more scared and he thrashed with panic, like a wild animal blindly trying to squirm away, but Sebastian roughly pushed his body into the mattress with his other arm, effectively immobilizing the boy.

Blood freely poured into Ciel's mouth, and he instinctively swallowed it, feeling the demon's wrist still pressed against his lips. His blue eye was widened with fright and confusion, but he couldn't even move an inch now, completely restrained.

"Now, that's not so difficult, is it, Master?"

* * *

_* This quote comes from the game "Alice: Madness Returns". I do not own it._


	8. Chapter 7

_AU: Thank you very, very much for all your reviews, favs and follows! :)_

_Shattered Apocalypse, thank you for beta-reading, you're a star!_

* * *

Ciel, no longer struggling, almost choked on the blood, barely able to swallow all of the crimson liquid that poured into his mouth far too fast. He was still confused and shocked, not understanding what exactly was going on.

"Well done, Master," praised the demon, pressing his wrist to Ciel's mouth a little harder, and at the same time, releasing the strong hold he had on Ciel's body, noticing that it wasn't needed anymore. "Just a little bit more," he promised, and gently caressed Ciel's pale cheek with his fingers.

Ciel let his eyelid fall. He was calmer, now that Sebastian wasn't restraining his body. He felt… different somehow. There was a wonderful, blessed numbness running through his veins, anaesthetizing all his pain.

The demon finally pulled away his wrist from Ciel's lips. As a thin trail of blood began to cascade down the boy's chin, Sebastian wiped it away with the back of his palm.

"Sebastian," Ciel hissed furiously, his now opened eye narrowing as he looked at the butler leaned down over him. "What the hell do you-"

He couldn't finish the sentence, as the demon immediately interrupted him.

"Everything is alright, my Lord," he spoke quietly, comfortingly. "You are so very tired… Aren't you? Just relax," he whispered, his voice tempting and hypnotizing.

"I…" Ciel began to protest weakly as he felt the sudden wave of tiredness.

"So sleepy, isn't that right?" murmured Sebastian close to his ear, black hair tickling his face slightly. The demon covered his eye with a hand. "Sleep then, Master."

Ciel sighed softly, his body, as if on cue, going completely limp, just like a ragdoll. He wasn't nervous anymore. All he could feel now was exhaustion and sleepiness, unable to resist the urge to succumb to oblivion. There was no doubt that whatever the demon did, it had an effect on him. Still, he couldn't bring himself to care now. The pain was gone and he just wanted to…

"Yes… Sleep, my Master…"

That was the last thing he heard before falling into a blissful, dreamless slumber.

* * *

Ciel woke up, feeling much well rested than he did in a long time. He stretched like a cat and dreamily stared at the ceiling, still not fully awake yet.

"Good morning, Young Master."

Sebastian's voice reached his ears and the memories of last night slowly started to come back to him. He sat up and looked at the butler, his head slightly tilted, as realization appeared on his face.

"_You_," he hissed, narrowing his eyes slightly. "Last night… why… how _dare_ you? How dare you touch me like that? How _dare_ you do something like that without my permission?!" His tone of voice grew stronger and louder with every word. "How dare you force-"

"I merely complied with your order," interrupted Sebastian emotionlessly, standing close to the bed. "'Do not let me die'," he recited. "That was your order, Master. I did what I had to do to keep you alive."

Ciel silenced and bit his bottom lip, seeming deep in thought. It was astonishing, but it was only after Sebastian spoke that he finally noticed he no longer felt any pain. He felt completely fine; all remnants of his illness gone. There was no doubt that Sebastian really did save him from his forthcoming death.

"Will it… I mean your blood… Change anything?" he murmured finally, after a long moment, his blue gaze fully focused on Sebastian.

Sebastian, still observing him, answered. "No, my Lord. As much as I am able to fully manipulate and control my form, I am also able to influence my blood's properties, that is, to a certain extent. My blood simply worked to strengthen your body, hence help you fight the disease," he explained.

For a moment, something changed in the way Ciel viewed the demon, but it was impossible to comprehend what his expression actually meant.

"I see," he murmured finally and averted his gaze, looking at the floor. "It better not," he added warningly.

He didn't know what he really felt anymore. He certainly… wasn't angry or scared anymore, he had to admit to that. And, to his displeasure, he couldn't help but discover that the demon's actions awakened an unwanted emotion in him, one he neither wanted to experience, nor thought he still had. Gratitude. He _knew_ that demon wasn't helping him out of his own initiative, but still… His mind didn't seem to care about it.

A slight smirk, which appeared on Sebastian's face, went unnoticed by Ciel. Only the butler's voice brought him back to the reality, from the depths of his confused and tangled thoughts.

"Master, there was a letter for you today."

Ciel blinked, looking at him with a slightly dazed expression on his face, as Sebastian handed him his mail. He opened the envelope, taking out the letter and quickly reading it.

"It's an invitation," he announced, handing the letter back to his butler. "I am invited to a masquerade ball held by the Duke of Dorset, which is in two days time. It seems like her Majesty already helped to spread the news regarding my comeback," he added, seeming pleased.

"Does Master wishes to attend the ball?" inquired Sebastian.

"Of course," huffed Ciel impatiently. "My position in society needs to be maintained, and I have to prove to everyone that, indeed, Earl Ciel Phantomhive being alive isn't just a gossip. Sebastian, we are going to have to get costumes. Because we will be visiting a shop there, we might as well do a little bit of investigation on that new case while we are on it."

Sebastian nodded. "Whatever my Master wishes, my Master gets."

* * *

They walked down the busy road. All the high street shops were open, and there were many seemingly rushing people everywhere. It was very crowded and noisy, and Ciel was finding it just a little bit annoying. Still, it wasn't all that bad, he had to admit, because he simply missed walking around freely.

There was no denying that he stood out. It wasn't only about his most fashionable, highest quality clothes; a cobalt blue winter coat with a large black bow on the back, a leather eyepatch, knickerbockers, dark silky stockings and gloves, as well as pair of the finest, high, laced boots. It wasn't about his tall, well-dressed, flawless, perfect looking butler, either. Most of all, it was Ciel's attitude that made him so distinctive to the passersby. His chin was high, his back straight, and his gaze: cold and distant, confidently arrogant, as if he thought he was better than everyone else.

Ciel stopped by a shabby house and knocked on the door with number five engraved on it. After a long moment, there was a squeaking noise, and in front of him appeared a young girl, seeming no older than seventeen. She had long, light blonde hair, wide eyes filled with fear, and was wearing a modest brown dress.

"I am solving the serial rapist case and I need your assistance," said Ciel silently, but his voice firm.

The girl looked at them for few seconds, before averting her eyes and letting them in.

The inside of the house was very simple; there was no doubt that she was poor. There was only necessary furniture inside, like a table and a couch, and the curtains were drawn shut, not letting any light in. It was dark and almost impossible to see anything.

"Please, sit down," the girl said, almost inaudibly and gestured to the non-comfy looking chairs. When they complied, she spoke again, seeming unsure. "The Scotland Yard already talked to me so why-"

Ciel interrupted her, shifting a little bit, trying to get himself more comfortable. "It doesn't matter. Please, do not concern yourself with them. Just tell us every detail you can remember," he said, his voice clearly suggesting that he didn't believe in Scotland Yard's abilities.

The girl nodded her head, not even once glancing at them. "It happened in St. Michael's Ally, as you probably know," she murmured. "I was going back from work. I work at the bakery… As I was walking, someone hit me on the head and I lost consciousness," she explained, clearly uncomfortable. "When I woke up-" she cut off abruptly.

"I understand. Did he say anything?" asked Ciel, breaking the silence. He had a pen and a notebook in his hand, as he was making notes.

"No," she whispered. "Not even once. Afterwards, he just left."

"Did you manage to see him at all?"

"Only a little bit…" The girl bit her lip nervously. "He was very tall… He was wearing a long, dark coat and that white scary mask, hiding his face. He had black hair."

Ciel's eyes narrowed slightly. "Black hair?" he repeated, seeming deep in thought. "Are you sure?"

The girl nodded, her eyes finally turning to them.

"I see…" muttered the boy and stood up. "I think this is all we need to know. Thank you for your assistance."

The girl suddenly got up from the chair. "Wait," she pleaded. "There is… something else. I know it may sound silly… Or maybe it's got nothing to do with the… event itself but," she spoke quickly, clearly nervous. "My necklace… I think he stole it. It wasn't worth anything, though, it didn't even looked like it was. I made it myself. I just thought… you should know."

"Thank you for saying this. It might be important," answered Ciel.

* * *

Sebastian shut the door behind them, as Ciel lazily leaned against the wall.

"I'm really tired…" sighed the boy. "But at least I've gathered quite a lot of information. And we have got the costumes," he added, briefly glancing at the bags held by demon, full of clothes.

"Yes, it was quite a busy day, Master," agreed Sebastian.

He put the bags on the floor and approached Ciel, taking the boy's furry hood off and starting to unbutton his coat.

"Mhm. I have my suspicions as regards to that serial rapist…" murmured Ciel, letting Sebastian take the warm winter coat off him.

Sebastian knelt down on one knee and began to skillfully unlace his shoes. "Oh? And what would they be, Master?" he asked.

Ciel, looking down at him, lifted his leg a little bit, allowing him to take the boot off. "I think there is more than just one rapist involved. Scotland Yard made a mistake. They didn't ask for enough details. Not all statements we've gathered match," answered Ciel, still observing the butler. "You're smirking," he said as he observed Sebastian's facial expression. "You have noticed that as well, haven't you?" he asked rhetorically.

"Indeed, my Lord. I also believe that."

Ciel nodded slightly, lifting his other leg, thus allowing the butler to take the second boot off. "I already have a plan on how to put an end to this. But first, I need to establish the pattern in locations; it shouldn't take too long, though… I doubt they are as random as Scotland Yard are making them to be."

Sebastian chuckled slightly. "It really seems that your health is back to normal, Young Master. If you still have that much energy to be plotting at this hour, I am sure there is nothing wrong with you anymore."

Ciel murmured something in reply and put his arms out, an impatient look on his face.

"What was that, Master? I'm afraid I didn't hear you," answered Sebastian in a teasing tone of the voice, now hanging his own coat.

Ciel scowled, before growling. "Carry me to the bathroom," he demanded firmly, clearly wanting to look serious, though the pout on his face made him seem childish.

"As you wish, Young Master."

The demon carefully picked him up.

* * *

Ciel couldn't believe how quickly the three days had gone, and that he was now in the Duke's of Dorset mansion, at the ball. He was wearing his new midnight blue costume with shiny buttons. It was a slight imitation of a soldier's outfit, but with many not so serious developments, like a large black ribbon on the back and a smaller one tied close to his neck. He had vertical, dark striped stockings with a decorative lace top, visible because of his shorter than usual knickerbockers, which had a furry tail attached to them. His black shoes had small heels so he appeared taller, and a black, cat-like mask was hiding part of his face. His grayish blue tinted hair was styled in such a way that it looked like he had a pair of cat ears. After all, it was a carnival ball, so he had to look exceptional for the situation.

Next to him was Sebastian. His clothes were, however, much simpler. He was dressed in a white shirt, a navy blue vest, black trousers and a tailcoat. This time, he had a red tie, matching the same colored rose placed in the chest pocket of his tailcoat. Sebastian also had a mask, but with a design opposing Ciel's: it was white and decorated with crimson, abstract traces.

There were many people, all dressed in exquisite costumes and masks. Music, mixed with laughter and chattering, could be heard all around, even in the most deserted corners of the mansion, and there was the smell of delicious food, placed on the tables and offered by servants. Many pairs were dancing; figures moving gracefully, long dresses, swirling colors and the echo of their muted footsteps. The atmosphere was almost magical, and everyone seemed happy and friendly.

Still, Ciel knew it was only a façade. He knew what balls were really like. Filled with gossip, jealousy and… betrayals. Masks were hiding away not only everyone's identities, but also their real intentions.

"Master, should you really be drinking alcohol?"

Sebastian's voice suddenly brought Ciel back to reality, from the depths of his thoughts. Ciel looked at the demon, and then to the glass he was holding, his gaze still slightly hazy.

"It's only a little bit," sighed the boy.

His butler merely smirked in reply. Before Ciel could say anything, a new voice joined the discussion.

"Oh, if it isn't the little Earl. Everyone here is talking about you. Seems like the gossip was real, after all. Are you having fun?" an Asian looking man asked dreamily, his eyes half-open. He was dressed in a Chinese outfit: a dark green tangzhuang with long sleeves.

In a matter of seconds, he sat on the couch, next to them, and pulled a petite yet curvy Asian girl with large golden eyes onto his lap. The girl wore a lavender cheongsam, a Chinese dress decorated with pink petals and thigh-high black tights. She had a white flower clipped to her short hair.

Recognition quickly appeared in Ciel's eyes. He saw the man quite a few times when his parents were still alive. And, of course, he thoroughly studied all the information on the acquaintances he now had, as the Queen's Watchdog.

"You are Lau, aren't you?" asked Ciel, not too loudly, looking at the man. "A Chinese nobleman, member of the Shanghai Mafia, a dealer; leader of an opium den and the head of the British branch of a trading company called Kon Ron," he added, confidently.

The Asian man, Lau, patted his head, causing Ciel to grimace slightly.

"Well, looks like you have done your homework, little Earl. But a dealer is such a bad word… I merely sell dreams to people who cannot survive because of the cruelty of reality," he commented, his voice still faraway, and somehow distant, but kind.

"Of course," murmured Ciel as he sipped his drink, clearly not convinced.

"Do you know Ran-Mao?" Lau asked, his palm caressing the silent girl's thigh. "Ran-Mao is my little sister. Even though we aren't related by blood," he added. "Hmm, I've got to exterminate the bad rats infesting my city, don't I? So I keep a cat."

Ran-Mao nodded, giving a quiet 'meow' in reply and letting her head rest on the man's shoulder.

"Mhmm… I have seen her a few times," replied Ciel.

Lau then stared at the demon, a hint of curiosity visible in his relaxed facial expression. "And who is this, little Earl? Your servant?"

Ciel briefly glanced at his butler, sitting next to him. "This is Sebastian," he answered. "I've got to exterminate the intruders standing in my way, don't I? So I keep a dog," he murmured emotionlessly, twisting Lau's words around.

Lau nodded in understanding, but Sebastian grimaced slightly upon hearing Ciel's last word.

Ciel looked at the demon with disapproval and annoyance. "You were supposed to bark, _dog,_" he said coldly. "You spoiled my little play with words."

"Pets are always useful… But perhaps you should consider training yours a little bit more," Lau chuckled. "Come on, Ran-Mao, we should dance a little bit," he added. Ran-Mao grasped his arm. "I hope we will meet soon to discuss business, little Earl, perhaps while playing pool," he suggested, turning to Ciel once again.

"Certainly," agreed Ciel. "It was good to see you," he threw, clearly out of politeness.

"And vice versa, little Earl. Of course, you also have my deepest condolences," said Lau, walking away. "Ran-Mao, have you seen our carnival masks anywhere?" he wondered, looking around.

Ciel, watching them go, stretched on the sofa, sighing. "Sebastian, bring me another drink," he demanded. "And don't you dare complain."

Sebastian stood up. "Oh, but I wouldn't dare to complain, my Lord," he added, clearly taunting him.

"I should dance, shouldn't I…? But there aren't any ladies my age here," he complained. "I would look ridiculous dancing with someone much taller than me."

To Ciel's displeasure, Sebastian, clearly amused, chuckled in reply, and complied with the order, walking away to get a drink for Ciel.

Ciel shifted slightly, getting himself more comfortable and letting his head lay on the sofa's backrest. He was observing a pair of guests, as they were passionately kissing in the corner of the room. He was certain that he saw this woman attending the ball with another man and not leaving his side for half of the time. Now, however, it seemed that she grew bored of his company and found some new one.

Sebastian quickly returned and handed him the drink. Before any of them could utter another word, a girl with long blonde curls and an elegant long pink dress, decorated with ribbons and frills, appeared in front of them. For a short second, Ciel stopped breathing. At first, he thought it was Elizabeth… Their style was so similar. Even the emerald eyes looked so alike… It was only after he got a closer look that he realized it was someone completely different. Not to mention the fact that this girl was probably about nineteen years old.

"My name is Alice," she spoke quietly, bowing slightly before Sebastian. A light blush covered her cheeks. "Would you please… dance with me?" Gathering her courage, she smiled mischievously. "I know it's usually men who should ask… But I believe that both men and women should have the same rights," she added wholeheartedly.

Sebastian briefly glanced at Ciel, as if asking for his permission. Ciel, not looking too happy, nodded. When Sebastian stood up and took girl's hand into his, he openly scowled, not even aware of it. He clutched the glass in his palm harder, as he watched them starting to dance.

Of course, he wasn't _jealous_, nothing of that sort. He was simply annoyed. Annoyed that he had to sit there, and watch his servant having fun with some desperate girl. Really, did she not know the etiquette? It was terribly bad taste, to ask a stranger to dance with her. She was a woman, and she shouldn't have acted like this. Still, he didn't have a choice but let Sebastian dance with her; it would have been highly inappropriate to humiliate her with rejection, and one would have thought that he was the one with no manners.

"Hello there, robin!" an enthusiastic voice exclaimed. "Are you that little Earl everyone is talking about?"

Ciel looked up, a little bit surprised by the sudden loud noise. A man with light blond hair and lavender eyes stood in front of him. A dark butterfly carnival mask hid his upper face. He wore an expensive looking white suit and an ascot tie, accompanied by a red brooch and white gloves.

Before he could react, the man reached for his palm. Ciel tried to free it, but the newcomer didn't let him, bringing it to his mouth and, to Ciel's shock, kissing it.

"I am Lord Aleister Chamber, a Viscount of Druitt," the handsome man explained, smiling at him charmingly and letting go of his hand. "It's a pleasure to meet you," he added.

"My name is Ciel Phantomhive," replied the boy, his voice slightly distant. "And I don't think you should have kissed my hand, I am not a girl so-"

Aleister Chamber interrupted him, his tone carefree. "Oh, but beauty should be appreciated by everyone, as it knows no gender, little robin."

"Mhm," murmured Ciel, not knowing what to say.

As the man shifted a little bit, getting closer to him, he started to feel somehow different: withdrawn, unfocused, detached... As if he was only watching everything from a distance. He averted his gaze, trying to search for Sebastian. The demon and the blonde girl were nowhere to be found.

Suddenly there was a hand on his hair, stroking it gently and slowly moving down to caress the back of his neck. Ciel didn't even stir, didn't try to stop him in any way. The man leaned down slightly, his mouth close to Ciel's ear.

"I cannot help but think of you as of the mischievous mocking birds, singing like a child in the daytime. But in the evening, I am certain that you show your true colors. The heartstring pulling smile behind your mask, so young, alone... I really want to hold you tightly in my arms," he whispered, his lips touching Ciel's earlobe.

Ciel remained completely still, unresponsive like a ragdoll at its owner's mercy. He didn't understand what was wrong with him. Maybe it was just alcohol's fault but he just felt… dissociated. And _where the hell_ was his butler? How dare he leave him here for so long, not caring in the slightest what was happening to him?

He suddenly stood up, finally freeing himself from the man's touch. He placed the now empty glass on the small nearby table.

"I have to find someone," he murmured silently, not even looking at the Viscount.

The blonde man also stood up, quickly going after him.

"Oh, but I will help you, little robin!" he offered. "This place is full of people… I would not want you to get lost."

Ciel just shook his head slowly. "I will manage," he argued, taking a few steps.

The man followed him, and in a matter of seconds, Ciel felt the Viscount grabbing his arm, hard enough to cause pain. He couldn't help but wince.

"I _insist_," said Viscount of Druitt, seeming a little bit annoyed now.

Ciel didn't reply, letting the man follow him, now wanting nothing more than to find out where his butler went. As they managed to make their way through the crowd of dancing people, approaching the corridor and the stairway, Aleister Chamber spoke again.

"Have you already been upstairs?" he inquired, gracefully gesturing with his hand towards the stairs. "If you would like me to, I will gladly show you around," he suggested.

Ciel didn't even hear him, his attention fully focused on something else, as he suddenly caught a glimpse of familiar, silky black hair in the crowd.

"Sebastian!" he called without thinking, watching for a reaction.

The figure turned around and Ciel immediately felt relieved seeing the well-known pale face, now covered by the mask he himself chose. The demon quickly appeared by his side, his eyes now on Aleister Chamber, who still had Ciel's arm in his painful clutch.

"There you are, Master," said Sebastian, turning his gaze to the boy's face. "Is everything alright?"

"I was… looking for you," murmured Ciel, his voice a bit unsure as he stared at the demon.

Sebastian, noticing his obvious discomfort, forcefully removed the blond noble's hand from Ciel, freeing the boy from his grasp. "I do not think that my Master appreciates being touched so freely," he commented lowly, a hint of a fake smile on his lips.

Viscount of Druitt gasped, clearly offended. "This is scandalous!" he exclaimed, his voice overdramatic. "How dare a mere servant treat me like this?" he hissed. "I was just-"

Ciel interrupted him, still looking at his butler only. "I believe we need to discuss something," he murmured, his tone unpleasant.

Without hesitation, he began to walk towards the balcony, breaking through the mass of people surrounding them, and clearly not listening to the Chamber, who was still loudly complaining. He didn't even need to turn around, he was certain that Sebastian was right behind him, following his every step.

Ciel stepped outside, on the balcony, taking a deep breath of fresh air. Nobody was there and he was thankful for it. It was dark already, but the view was still beautiful: soft snow lay everywhere, a white blanket illuminated by the moonlight.

He turned around and stared at Sebastian. The relief caused by finding him was quickly washed away by anger and annoyance. As soon as he remembered his earlier meeting with Viscount of Druitt, he couldn't help but feel fury and disappointment. It was only now getting to him; the man's words and not so innocent touches. It was as if he just woke up and realized what was really happening back then.

"How dare you just leave me there? Where did you go with that whore when he started touching me?" Ciel hissed lowly, barely able to control himself anymore. He didn't know whether it was because of alcohol, or simply anger.

"Forgive me, Master. However, you are the one who wanted me to dance with her. Lady Alice suddenly felt unwell so I had no choice but-" the demon began to explain, his voice, as usual, lacking any emotions.

"I do not care about _Lady Alice," _growled Ciel, spatting the girl's name as if was the most vile thing in the whole world. "_I _am your first priority, therefore you should have been by _my_ side the moment he laid his disgusting finger on me!"

His eye narrowed slightly in anger as he looked at the demon's expressionless face, lacking any guilt. Without any hesitation, he slapped Sebastian, as hard as he could. The hit managed to tear the white mask off the pale face, and consequentially its sharp porcelain edge cut into it, leaving a red bleeding line.

The sound of the carnival mask falling against the marble floor seemed unnaturally loud to Ciel. He watched as Sebastian, still composed as always, not looking even mildly surprised, brought his fingers to his cheekbone, wiping away the blood. He then looked at his crimson covered digits before bringing them to his mouth, and without any rush, finger by finger, he slowly licked the blood away, making them clean again.

Ciel, now with mixed feelings, just watched him. Before he could say anything, Sebastian spoke first.

"I must admit… I never thought you would be the violent type, my Lord. I always think it is amusing, what alcohol does to humans," murmured the demon, smirking at Ciel.

"You really do not know when to stop, do you?" Ciel hissed at the comment, hating his attitude, hating the fact that he had tears in his eyes now. Of course they were _only _caused by anger. He wasn't upset. No. Everything was fine. He was okay, nothing happened. Nothing, nothing, nothing…

The demon, watching him intensely, leaned down, so his face was almost on the same level as Ciel. He could sense pure vulnerability now. Oh, how pitiful it was; his prey, trying to show that it was in control, while deep inside it was filled only with despair, silently begging to be saved by _him_. So fragile and weak, yet trying to show otherwise.

"Master, you only had to do one thing," he spoke softly. Before Ciel could stop him, he reached for the cat-like black mask and gently took it off the boy's face, placing it on the cold, snowy floor. He then skillfully tied off the black eyepatch. "If you open your eye with my mark upon it and call me, I will always come to you, no matter where you are," he whispered a promise, never breaking the eye contact.

"I… I forgot. I just didn't know what to do," murmured Ciel, hating the way his voice sounded right now, almost as if he was _crying _and he_ wasn't_. Much to his displeasure and shame, tears finally escaped, now making their way down his cheeks.

"There is no need to be upset, my Lord," Sebastian assured him, gently wiping away the tears with the back of his hand.

"It's your fault," accused Ciel.

Sebastian couldn't help but chuckle at the drunken tone of his voice. "Master, I am afraid you really do not handle alcohol well. It makes you an emotional wreck," he said.

"I am not drunk," protested Ciel, sounding offended, a scowl on his face. "Everything is your fault."

Sebastian didn't comment, though he looked like he wanted to.

Ciel kept staring at him, not moving. He couldn't help but feel satisfaction upon seeing the no longer perfect porcelain skin, now marred with a cut created by him. Unable to stop himself, he gently brushed his finger against the wound.

"I own you," Ciel whispered. "I can do whatever I want to you because my soul is precious," he added and stared him in the eyes. He then licked his lips, leaning closer to Sebastian. "You better remember that."


	9. Chapter 8

_AU: I am really sorry for the delay. It was caused by my health problems. Thank you very much for all the reviews, favs and follows!_

_Shattered Apocalypse, thank you for being one hell of a beta-reader!_

* * *

In response to Ciel's words, the demon smirked at him wickedly, never breaking the eye contact.

"Oh, but I do remember, my Lord," Sebastian murmured silently. "I remember it clearly, you do own me… until your revenge is complete. But then…" He broke off abruptly.

Before the boy had a chance to answer, Sebastian touched his palm, grasping it into his own and taking it away from the cut that was on his cheek.

"Then your soul will be mine," he whispered darkly, his tone of the voice making Ciel shiver. "But it's a fair deal, is it not?"

He then looked at Ciel's blood covered fingers and slowly brought them to his own mouth, licking the blood away, just like he did to his own digits not so long ago.

"Stop it!" shrieked Ciel, though it wasn't clear whether he meant Sebastian's haunting words or his action. He jerked his hand away, freeing it from the demon's clutch in one swift movement.

"My apologies, Master… I was just trying to clean you up a little bit. Your fingers were very dirty, people could have thought that you lacked manners," said Sebastian carelessly.

Ciel briefly glanced at him, with annoyance. "Your mouth is far more dirty," he hissed. "I want another drink," he added and turned around.

Ciel picked up the mask off the floor. He began to walk back inside the mansion, out of the balcony, and Sebastian followed him without a single word.

* * *

An hour later Ciel was standing in a circle of people, engaged in a discussion. In the group there were five men, clearly businessmen, wearing elegant suits and no masks, and two women, dressed in expensive looking costumes.

"Of course, Funtom Co. will soon be the most successful company again," Ciel murmured, his voice slurred. "I am already working on that."

He was now looking as if he was barely able to uphold himself in a standing position. Still, it was clear that he wasn't the only one who was intoxicated.

"Oh, I have no doubts about it!" exclaimed one of the men, standing closest to Ciel. "I am sure that doing business with you will be a pleasure, just like it was with your father," he added in an optimistic tone of the voice.

Ciel just nodded before he started to talk again. "I think that in three weeks time I will release a new series of toys; the Rabbit Family," he explained, his gaze unfocused. "I am certain it will be a top seller."

A woman next to him smiled. "How cute!" she commented, her fingers briefly brushing Ciel's cheek. "I would love to have a son like you one day."

Before Ciel had a chance to say something, he suddenly felt dizzy. He had to lean against the wall behind him to prevent falling over. His mind seemed hazy.

"Sebastian," he murmured silently, now wanting nothing more but have the butler near him, even though he told him to stay ten meters away from him just an hour ago.

The demon immediately appeared by his side. "Master, do you wish to leave the ball now?" he asked, his hands on Ciel's shoulders to steady him. "I know you are not well, therefore…"

"No," interrupted weakly Ciel, shaking his head. "That would be impolite, nobody leaves that early."

Sebastian sighed. "Well, perhaps you would like me to take you to one of the guests room, so you can rest for a little bit?" he suggested.

Ciel nodded and tried to say something, but one of the women, who kept watching Sebastian intensely, suddenly spoke, her voice excited.

"Oh, is that your butler?"

"Yes…" replied the boy and turned to Sebastian again, who offered the woman a polite smile. "Help me walk. My legs just… feel weird," he demanded and excused himself, not forgetting about his newly acquired acquaintances.

Sebastian complied with his request. His arm was soon around Ciel's waist, supporting him. Ciel, to Sebastian's surprise, made a clear effort to walk, though stumbled a few times.

"Why did this happen…?" Ciel slurred incoherently, his tone accusing, as if he suspected it was his butler's fault.

"Master, I already told you. You had too much alcohol. You are completely _drunk_,"explained patiently Sebastian, purposefully keeping the sentences short and simple.

Ciel gasped, clearly offended, glazed, dull look on Sebastian again. "How dare you? I am not," he protested.

He leaned into Sebastian heavily as he was half dragged through the ballroom. Unfortunately, his coordination suddenly worsened, and the last shreds of strength left him. The demon didn't let him collapse though, and effortlessly picked him up bridal style.

"That's better," Ciel murmured, softly sighing with relief. "But it's embarrassing…" he murmured, hiding his face in demon's neck, shying away from people's stares, a cat's furry tail attached to the costume pathetically hanging in the air.

Sebastian smirked in response, but Ciel was unable to see this. He quickly carried the boy upstairs and picked one of the guest rooms at the end of the corridor. It was plain but tidy, and tastefully furnished. There were candles placed in the corners, effectively chasing away the darkness, and the curtains were drawn shut.

Ciel felt better when the loud music and other noises subsided. He touched the soft cover's surface as Sebastian lay him on the bed and then sat close to him.

"It's comfortable," Ciel sighed, lazily taking off the eyepatch. He stretched and spread his arms out, clearly relaxed. "But cold," he added, finally realizing how chilly it really was in that place.

Sebastian didn't reply. Without hesitation, he brushed a strand of hair from Ciel's cheek and leaned down, his face close to Ciel's, who now had his eyes closed.

"Master, do you want me to tell you a secret?" he asked quietly, not moving away even an inch.

A hint of an amused smirk appeared on Ciel's lips and he gave a barely audible 'mhm' in response.

Sebastian's mouth was suddenly close to his ear. "Some sins are the finest flavors to the pure, innocent soul," he whispered to him, fully aware of the fact that the boy was not going to remember this conversation the next day.

A mismatched pair of eyes suddenly opened, staring right at him.

"For example?" Ciel murmured silently, his gaze hazy.

"I will leave that for you figure out, my Lord," answered Sebastian. He tried to pull away from Ciel, but was suddenly stopped as a pale, delicate palm grabbed his red tie harshly, not letting him move.

Ciel looked at him without saying anything for a long moment, before he spoke again, his voice surprisingly meek, as oppose to his action. "Don't leave."

"I wasn't planning to leave the room, Master, I was just-"

"No," murmured Ciel, interrupting him. "Don't leave my side. That's an order," he slurred. "My dog used to sleep on my bed when I was afraid at night… And you are my new dog now. This place is just creepy," he mumbled, without a single hint of doubt.

Sebastian, clearly amused, asked. "Does it mean that my Master wishes to let his servant lay on the same bed?"

Ciel made an annoyed 'tch' sound, his patience running thin. "You are just a dog now, not even a servant," he commented, sighing. "Don't you dare make me… repeat myself."

"As you wish, my Lord," replied Sebastian, his voice far too amused to make it unnoticeable. It was impossible not to see a hint of a triumph and satisfaction in his red eyes. Gracefully, he climbed on the bed and lay on the soft mattress, close to Ciel's fragile figure.

Ciel titled his head to the side slightly, closing his eyes and ignoring the demon. However, shortly after his eyelids fell, he felt the mattress shift. He couldn't sense the fact that the demon was hovering over him again, only finding out about his presence when he felt a soft touch on his neck.

"What… are you doin' to me?" he murmured without thinking, not concerned enough to open his eyes. As soon as the words left his mouth, he felt an unnerving sense of anxiety. They were so disturbingly… familiar. He remembered saying them before.

_"Do you like it?"_

A pained grimace appeared on his face, his whole body shifting, clearly in distress.

_"Do you want me to kiss you some more, pretty?"_

His eyes snapped wide open, staring right back at crimson ones. A hint of a smile appeared on Sebastian's lips, his fingers still on Ciel's fragile throat. It was hard to deny; the demon looked like he was enjoying Ciel's evident fear.

"The bow, my Lord," replied finally Sebastian, in a neutral tone of the voice. "I was just untying it, so it won't constrict your breathing too much if you fell asleep." The demon's fingers began to slowly, without any hurry, untie the black ribbon decorating the boy's neck.

Ciel visibly relaxed, his body going limp, like a ragdoll at its owner's complete mercy once again. "The truth is… that you want to tie it tighter," he whispered, his voice incoherent and somehow bitter. "Isn't it?" he added, not moving an inch.

Sebastian's fingers stilled for a moment. "Are you inviting me to do so?" he asked finally, emotionlessly. Not waiting for reply, he spoke again. "As tempting as it might be… I do not break contracts, Master." In one swift movement, he completely unlaced the ribbon, effectively freeing the pale neck from its clutch.

The piece of dark silky material was placed on the bed sheet. Without thinking, Ciel reached for it, small fingers playing with it without any purpose.

"I am not afraid," he murmured, not looking at the demon, still totally occupied with the black ribbon, like a curious kitten playing with a ball of yarn. "Of you. Even though…" he sighed, letting the ribbon encircle his wrist, as if it was a snake. "Even though you are so close to me."

Sebastian, now rolled on his stomach, with his head resting on his hands and elbows on the soft mattress, stared at Ciel, interest clear in his gaze. Perhaps, alcohol _was _a human truth serum after all. "You have no reason to, Master. I will never betray you," he said, keeping the amusement out of his voice.

"Never," repeated mindlessly Ciel, his eyes dull and empty, still looking at the ribbon. He sat up and slowly crawled closer to Sebastian. The demon also shifted into a sitting position, letting their gazes meet.

"Master, is everything…?"

Ciel didn't let him finish. "My soul…" he murmured, his voice silent but without even a hint of fear or discomfort. "What will happen then… After you take it? Will I still feel regrets or sadness or-" he abruptly cut off.

"You will feel nothing at all," answered Sebastian, his voice somehow comforting, letting Ciel hear exactly what he wanted to hear. He was a bit surprised that Ciel wanted to talk about it now, but didn't show it.

Ciel let a soft sigh of relief. "When you look at me like this, like now…" he suddenly started talking again. "It feels as if you are staring right into my soul. Your eyes just… seem to pierce straight into it," he muttered, barely audibly.

There was an unreadable look on the demon's face. Soon, his fingers found their way to Ciel's face, gently brushing a strand of hair from his visage, as if once again finding an excuse to touch the porcelain skin. "Does it bother you, my Lord?" he murmured.

Ciel just shook his head in silence. "It… feels nice," he murmured but it wasn't clear whether he was referring to his previous sentence or the demon's touch.

"Does it?" a light chuckle escaped Sebastian's mouth. He was clearly enjoying the situation.

"Mhm. It's… different," Ciel whispered. As he felt the demon's palm shift, first lowering to his neck, and then lightly brushing his chin, he titled his head slightly, instinctively giving him better access.

"How is it different, Master?" asked Sebastian, but his tone suggested that he didn't care too much. He continued to caress Ciel, as if he was stroking a favorite pet. He couldn't help but for a second turn his gaze to the furry tail attached to Ciel's costume. _A cat_.

"Because it's… you," murmured Ciel, as if that explained everything. "You are my pawn," he added, his voice a little bit louder. "Therefore… Nobody will ever again…" he didn't finish, biting his lip slightly.

Ciel attempted to shift a little bit, but lack of coordination caused by alcohol ruined his plans. He found himself stumbling, almost falling face first on the covers, but the demon's arms prevented it, firmly grasping his waist and steading him. He didn't even know when one of his hands moved. He only registered that it was now placed on Sebastian's shoulder.

"I just… wanted to know how it feels when _I_ want it, without being forced," he breathed, staring into crimson eyes, checking for a reaction after his sudden confession.

It was difficult to read Ciel's expression. There was some uncertainty in his face, mixed with pain and something else, something far less negative.

"This is completely understandable," said the demon, calmly, comfortingly. "Don't be upset, Master," he added, his tone still gentle, as if he was dealing with a wild, skittish animal.

Without any hesitation, he carefully brought Ciel even closer, his hands still on the boy's waist, now slightly embracing him.

"I will obey your every order, my Lord. And I will never bring harm to you," he promised once again. He leaned down a bit, his mouth now close to Ciel's ear. "I am the only one in the entire world that you can trust. You have no one else," he whispered.

For a moment, Ciel felt a sting of pain upon hearing those words, making him realize how alone he really was now. It was true. There was nobody else for him in this world. His parents, Elizabeth, aunt Angelina, servants… All gone.

"Everyone is dead," Ciel murmured, completely unaware of his action. Even the look in his eyes changed. They now appeared unfocused, dull, _lifeless_, as if they belonged to a doll.

"I'm sorry, Master."

_I know you aren't._

The hand was now stroking his hair. It was different. Different than _them_. There was no force in those touches, they weren't rushed and desperate, they weren't tainted and harmful.

All he wanted was to forget the pain. He wanted to stop all those feelings; sadness, guilt, pain, fear. He wasn't _supposed_ to feel them anymore, he was meant to be strong now…

Forget. Forget. _Forget_. Get rid of those emotions. But the words he spoke to him again… _Don't be upset. _So comforting, so gentle. So... fake. Almost as if he cared. As _if_. But it was good enough. It was better than nothing. He was good at pretending, too. After all, he was the one with power over _him_. For now.

He leaned closer to Sebastian, closing the short distance that was separating them. His lips, unsure, inexperienced, covered the demon's lips, gently brushing over them. They were softer and warmer than he expected them to be.

Sebastian, taking it as permission, began to kiss him back, without any rush, his tongue sliding over Ciel's bottom lip. Sensing that the boy was enjoying it, he suddenly pulled away, teasing him on purpose. Ciel's eyes narrowed slightly but before he had a chance to protest, he felt demon's mouth on his neck.

Feeling the demon place a trail of kisses on the sensitive skin, his heart raced, but he wasn't even half as afraid as he thought he would be. It wasn't unpleasant, he couldn't lie about that… It wasn't anything like what he experienced with _them_. He didn't know if alcohol was to blame or not. Maybe it was, after all.

His hands grasped Sebastian's arm harder when he felt demon's tongue sliding in the hollow of his throat_. _He couldn't stop a quiet moan from escaping his lips. Under normal circumstances he would probably be embarrassed but now he just couldn't bring himself to care.

Pale hands with black nails started fidgeting with the upper buttons of his costume, while lips continued to nip and nibble at his neck in the most sensitive places. He felt warm lips moving down slowly, following the path where his artery was beneath the skin, in a much harsher, less gentle manner. Then even lower, leaving marks across his protruding collarbone and making him gasp.

It wasn't supposed to be like this. _He _was meant to be the one in charge. Instead, he felt like he was completely losing control over the situation and he didn't like it. It was making him think about the past, it was bringing back memories he didn't want to remember. But… things were different now, weren't they? Unlike back then, he had the power to end it now.

"Enough," he suddenly hissed sharply, his nails painfully clawing at Sebastian's shoulders. He appeared nervous, as if unsure what was going to happen now.

The demon immediately stopped, backing away a bit and staring at his face.

A blissful relief washed over Ciel. He closed his eyes for a brief second, before opening them and turning to the demon once again. Now he was certain; _he _would stop. It was different, now he was sure of it. He had evidence.

Without any hesitation, Ciel forced Sebastian to lie down on his back; delicate, pale hands pushing at the demon's chest. Crawling on his hands and knees to him, clearly not wanting to risk another fall, he straddled Sebastian's hips. He then leaned down to kiss him, almost completely laying down on him, his entire weight now resting on the demon's body. He began experimentally licking and biting demon's mouth, to the point of drawing blood with sharp, innocent-looking, small teeth.

Sebastian didn't even wince. He simply let him do as he pleased, not touching him nor interfering in any way, and letting him be in charge, clearly knowing what Ciel's reasons were.

Ciel shifted again, moving down a little bit to give some attention to the demon's neck. He made himself gasp, a feeling of a pleasant, unexpected friction completely surprising him. He kissed the demon briefly, teasingly, just below the jaw line before licking the side of his throat and biting down, quite hard.

This time, Sebastian was actually mildly surprised, not expecting it. They looked at each other for a second; crimson eyes staring into a mismatched pair of eyes, now seeming unnaturally cloudy and dull. He suddenly felt a hand grabbing his wrist, directing it to Ciel's inner side of left thigh, as if silently ordering him to touch him, too.

The moment Ciel's other palm rested on Sebastian's crotch, the door opened. Ciel withdrew his hand, startled, and instinctively turned around, immediately regretting it in his mind. He only managed to get a glimpse of dark hair, before hearing a full of disregard "excuse me" and the sound of door being closed again.

What if someone recognized him and…? He couldn't even imagine the rumors.

Suddenly feeling much more sober and anxious, he slowly moved away from Sebastian.

"Master…"

"Shut up," he murmured harshly, clearly distressed. He was trying to button up the costume and failing badly. His hands just didn't seem to be working properly.

Sebastian, suddenly closed to him again, began to fix his outfit without a word. Ciel let him, averting his gaze, his breathing still slightly uneven. He was feeling dizzy again. He didn't know if it was because of stress or not but he doubted that he could stand up now.

The demon finished the task quickly, making Ciel look presentable again. He couldn't believe how easy it was... How little it took to almost tempt his prey into committing one of the seven deadly sins. Just a few sweet words, mixed with the hidden cruel ones and some gentle touches, and he had his tragic, wide-eyed victim willing to blemish its own soul even further. He would succeed, if not for the unwanted guest, there was no doubt about it. Still, he wasn't too worried. There will be many chances yet. The porcelain doll, only for him to spoil, taint, and _crush _in the end, was going to bend to his will many times, while thinking it was actually the one pulling the strings. How amusing… His meal was going to be beyond perfection when he was through with it.

"Take me home," a slightly hoarse voice demanded, interrupting his thoughts.

Sebastian looked at Ciel for a second, before effortlessly picking him up.

Ciel closed his eyes, hiding his face in demon's neck. "You passed the test," he murmured, and sighed softly before adding. "Good dog."

Finally, his overtired and intoxicated body decided to shut down and he blacked out.

Sebastian couldn't help but smirk. Yes, point of view depends on viewing point.

* * *

When Ciel finally woke up, it was already evening, meaning he's been out for about seventeen hours. He felt absolutely awful and completely groggy, as if he didn't get any sleep at all. He had a headache, his throat was completely dry and he thought he might get sick soon. He slowly forced himself to sit up, barely aware of what was going on around him. He rubbed his eyes, realizing that his eyepatch was off. He noticed that he was wearing his nightshirt, so Sebastian must have changed his clothes. He sighed, stretching.

He remembered going to the carnival ball last night but now most of what happened there was just blurry. He couldn't remember very well whom he spoke to or how long he'd been there. However, he had a certain, quite disturbing memory. At least he thought it was a memory. But perhaps, he only dreamed that? He bit his lip, deep in thought.

"I see you are finally awake. Good… evening, Master." An enthusiastic voice distracted him suddenly.

A demon appeared next to his bed, handing him a glass of water. He instinctively turned his gaze to him, his palm reaching for a drink. Before he grabbed a hold of it, he suddenly withdrew his hand. He was staring at Sebastian's neck. Or more precisely, the love bites decorating it, going lower and probably hiding beneath the collar of his white shirt.

So it was a memory after all. Did he really disgrace himself that much? He was ashamed, even though he knew why he did what he did. It wasn't because he was drunk and he didn't know what he was doing. Alcohol was just… a trigger, helping him reduce his inhibitions. It was him, who really wanted to test how much he could trust Sebastian; whether he would really obey his orders under any circumstance. It was him, who really wanted to know how it felt to be with another person, in _that_ sense, without being forced to. Even though he knew he stopped before things got more serious (the reasons for it, however, seemed to be wiped away from his memory), still, he couldn't believe he sank this low to actually attempt to experience it. No, he won't think about it now, he will think about it tomorrow_. _He was just unable to deal with it today. Thankfully, it appeared that the demon didn't have the nerve to confront him about it. Oh, he would pay dearly if he did.

"I forbid you from mentioning last night's events to me," he murmured, not looking at the demon.

Sebastian just nodded, acknowledging his words, hiding his chuckle.

Without another word, Ciel reached for a glass again, clutching it. It was only when he glared at the floor, he noticed that something wasn't right. Something was different. The white, elegant floor and decorated snowy walls… Lavender colored bed curtains, large window he could see everything from, even when in bed, the oh so familiar wooden dressing table…

A quiet, shocked gasp left his mouth and a glass slipped from his palm. Sebastian gracefully caught it before it managed to fall and shatter. Ciel stood up, not even caring about it, looking around, taking in every little detail.

"It's not a summerhouse, it's…" he began to mumble, unable to stop his hands form trembling. "It's… home," he finally managed, his voice weak but he forgot all about his tiredness and nausea. "How…?"

Sebastian placed the glass on the nightstand, apparently deciding it wasn't safe to give to Ciel again. He then replied, watching Ciel's reaction with curiosity. "When you were ill, you told me 'I want the mansion back'. Therefore, I had your old mansion rebuilt. Your every wish is my command, Master," he bowed his head slightly, his face void of emotions. "But I think you already understand that, don't you… my Lord?" he added, his tone suggestive.

Ciel, far too busy with exploring every corner of the room, looking completely awed, appeared to ignore the remark. Or maybe he just didn't hear it. Soon he was out of the room, checking out all the other rooms.

"It's amazing…" he murmured silently, as if to himself. He was walking through the corridor, observing everything around him and Sebastian was following his every step.

"Thank you, Master," replied the butler, even though he was clearly aware that Ciel didn't mean to praise him. "I will take care of hiring some more servants soon but… There is something else, though," he added, approaching the boy.

He touched Ciel's wrist, trying to get his attention. It worked better than talking to him because Ciel actually reacted and turned around, staring at him.

Somehow it just… felt different. Having Sebastian touch him now. Somehow... more uncomfortable? Yes, maybe that was it. But he pushed those thoughts away. For now.

"I was able to retrieve something from the remains of your mansion, my Lord," Sebastian said simply. He then crouched down before Ciel, taking out a small item from his pocket. It was an ornate silver piece holding an emerald-cut deep sapphire blue stone. A family ring.

He grabbed Ciel's palm gently and slipped it onto the boy's right thumb. Ciel, without a word, just stared at it, clearly not expecting it. That ring… Was a symbol of his power, he decided. It showed that he really was the one and only Earl Ciel Phantomhive. It was the _proof_. Apparently, the Rabbit _wasn't_ the only thing that survived the Fire.

A hint of a smile appeared on Ciel's lips. He suddenly felt better, better than he did in a long time. With the return of his ring, some pride and dignity were returned to him. Even the last night's event lost its meaning. He was Earl Ciel Phantomhive. Sebastian was his servant; he had complete control over him. Nobody knew what happened because they themselves were the only witnesses. Therefore, there was nothing to worry about.

"Sebastian, help me get ready," he said suddenly, some color back on his pale face now. "Tonight I am going to solve the case. I can't keep her Majesty waiting, after all."

* * *

Ciel was still out of breath. Sebastian just finished putting a black and red corset, decorated with some ribbons, on him. He couldn't believe how women could do this every single day.

"Ah, isn't it… a little bit too tight?" he managed to choke, barely audibly.

"Not at all, Master. It's perfect," replied Sebastian carelessly. He was standing right behind him, lacing up the corset.

"I doubt you'd be saying that if you were the one wearing it," Ciel hissed, his eyes narrowed with annoyance.

"It was your idea, my Lord," commented the demon, shrugging.

Ciel just scowled in reply, resisting the urge to slap him.

When Sebastian finished, he looked at Ciel's reflection in the mirror. "You look-" he began.

"Like a street prostitute," Ciel finished the sentence bluntly, also observing himself.

Besides corset, he was wearing a layered, far-too-short-to-look-decent black skirt decorated with frills, ribbons and laces of all sorts. It was showing his pale thighs, revealing the suspenders attached to fishnet stockings. His hair was different; long and fake, perfectly mixing with his own real hair, extending almost to his elbows. He was wearing make up, too. His eye, the one uncovered by the eyepatch appeared even larger now, eyelashes longer and curly, a healthy fake blush covering his cheeks. It was flawless but he didn't expect any less from one hell of a butler, after all.

"Which is exactly what you wanted," said the demon, his fingers brushing through Ciel's hair, getting rid of a forgotten tangle.

"It doesn't make me hate it any less. There is a difference between what I want and what I have to do," murmured Ciel. "Right now, I must… look alluring to the culprits. I have to catch their interest. And they only have interest in young girls with good looks," he added, turning his head away, escaping demon's touch. "Bring me my shoes, we have to leave now."

* * *

Ciel and Sebastian were standing in the dark alley, illuminated by the soft yellow glow coming from the street lamps. It was only thanks to them that it wasn't entirely dark here. The whole place seemed to be asleep; not a single soul walking around, all the house windows closed, not a hint of light in them. However, what Ciel found worse than that, was the silence. Somehow, it was terrifying him and bringing back the memories of the Asylum. He was trembling from the cold, and the snow making crunching sounds underneath their feet wasn't making it any better.

"Now go," Ciel whispered, not looking at Sebastian. "This is the right place."

The demon didn't look entirely convinced. "Master, are you sure it is a good idea to use yourself as a bait?" he asked, a little bit of doubt sneaking into his voice.

"Of course it is," snapped Ciel, clearly irritated now. "I will call you as soon as they get close to me. You yourself said that if I do that, you would find me."

"Yes, Master, but-"

"Don't question me," replied harshly Ciel. "This is an order, leave now, away from the whole area we discussed and do not return until I call you," he said firmly, though his voice didn't sound as confident anymore.

Sebastian bowed slightly. "Your wish is my command, Master," he answered simply and began to walk away.

Ciel watched the demon go and soon disappear in the darkness, leaving him all alone. For a second, he actually wanted to call his name, ask him to return to his side. But he didn't, too proud and too inclined on capturing the culprits. He had to prove her Majesty that he was worthy the title of a Queen's Watchdog.

Taking a deep breath, he began to wander through the alley aimlessly. He was getting anxious now. The cold, silence and darkness were not a good combination and he didn't like any of them in the first place. It was so quiet that he could actually hear his own breathing, seeming unnaturally loud and irregular to him.

He turned left, walking into another alley. The ground was even more slippery and icy there and he almost tripped, the heels not making it any easier for him. A sprained ankle was the last thing he needed now, so he was thankful for his own coordination.

He didn't know how much time it passed. Hours, minutes? Still, there was no sign of the culprits. He started to wonder whether his suspicions were correct. After analyzing the evidence, he came to the conclusion that they would definitely show up in this area, and most probably tonight. That was what the pattern suggested. Maybe he made a mistake in his calculations?

A sudden noise completely startled him. He immediately turned around, looking for its source, a revealed blue eye wide with fear. He then heard a loud mewl and finally noticed a white cat, making its way out of the old cartoon boxes it just knocked over.

"Damn cat…" he murmured, sighing with relief and almost wanting to laugh at being this skittish. There was nothing to worry about. He only had to call Sebastian, in case they showed up.

He suddenly stilled. The disturbing sound of crunching snow was right behind him. Too distracted by the cat, he didn't notice it before…

Someone restrained his arms roughly, at the same time covering his nose and mouth with a wet, sickly sweet smelling rag.

…before it was too late.

He wasn't going to give up that easily and immediately began to struggle, putting all his strength into it. Every single one of his limbs seemed to be getting numb but he managed to free his arm and blindly clawed at the opponent's face. A pained, angered groan confirmed that his aim was quite good. However, his action only proved to make the situation worse.

Aggravated, the culprit forcefully showed him into the nearest wall, the back of Ciel's head taking most damage, making him gasp in pain. Because of the effort and panic, his breathing was fast and erratic, causing him to inhale even more substance in a shorter time. He was getting dizzier with every second. His vision was blurry, but he managed to see a white porcelain mask with a red mark, resembling a laceration, covering the face of the person who was still restraining him and pressing the cloth into his face. His knees buckled but the culprit didn't let him fall to the ground.

There was a flaw in his plan, after all. That was Ciel's last thought before he passed out.


	10. Chapter 9

_AU: Thank you very, very much for reviews, favs and follows! They always motivate me :)_

_Thank you so much for beta-reading, Shattered Apocalypse!  
_

* * *

Ciel's uncovered eye fluttered open. His throat was sore and there was an unpleasant metallic taste in his mouth. But the worst of all was the headache. It felt as if someone had hit him over the head with a hammer. He was disoriented as he looked around, not recognizing his surroundings. It seemed as though he was in some sort of abandoned building; an old storage room, perhaps. The walls were grey and dirty, and the floor had plenty stains and scratches. There was literally nothing in this room that would give him any clues on his location.

After a few moments, his mind began to clear up a little bit and he started to recall what happened. He was attacked and knocked out. Things didn't go as they were supposed to, mainly because he never had the chance to call Sebastian.

As he began to slowly sit up, fighting the dizziness, he realized that his wrists were restrained and tied behind his back. Still, this wasn't worrying him too much. What he found really concerning was the fact that there was a piece of material tied over his mouth, preventing him from speaking.

Things possible couldn't get any worse. He was angry with himself for letting something like this happen, and knew he should've given the plan some more thought instead of acting so impulsively. But it just… wasn't supposed to be like this. None of the victims claimed to be knocked out unconscious with any sort of substance or drug. Why were things different this time?

Ciel suddenly heard loud footstep, getting closer and closer. It sounded as if there was more than one person. If that was the case, then his assumptions were right. Then he could hear their voices, too. Deciding it would be best if he didn't attract too much attention with his awaking, he quickly lay on the floor once again, his revealed eye closing.

"Why did you have to get us all in here, Will? You know the rules! It's risky and-" A loud hiss, interrupted by another voice.

"It was your idea to try that, Cas, and she won't wake up! I didn't know what to do! What if she's dead?!"

"Don't be ridiculous. If you didn't overdose her, she's not dead," another, much more calmer and collected third voice added.

_Bingo_. He was right, after all. There was more than one person involved. Not that it was beneficial to him now, given the circumstances. He heard the footsteps even clearer now, so there was no doubt they were all approaching him. He could sense someone crouching down next to him.

"She's very pretty," a voice murmured, brushing his cheek briefly. It took all his willpower not to flinch.

"Looks like a whore, though," added the second voice.

"She probably is one."

He then felt a cold hand on his neck, gently pressing into his skin.

"She's unconscious, just like I said, Will."

"So the chloroform really works."

"I told you it would. Let's just leave now so he can get over with it."

Oh _no_. He didn't like that idea one bit and he certainly was not planning to go through with any of it. Without thinking, he did the only thing he could, and opened his uncovered blue eye, staring at the people surrounding his form.

"Shit…" he heard the panicky voice again, but wasn't sure which one of them said it.

There were three men hovering over him, including the one wearing the mask. They looked like they were in their twenties, at most. Two of them were dark haired, and one was blond.

The brunet sighed loudly, covering his eyes with a palm and shaking his head. "You are a complete idiot, you know that, Will?" he murmured. "You just complicated everything," he added, glancing at Ciel's unmoving form.

The man with his face covered by the mask didn't reply.

"He's right," the blond agreed, his tone of the voice harsh. "You made a huge mistake, and now you're going to fix this," he growled.

He then turned around, walking towards the door and to a different room. Noises could be heard, indicating that he was searching for something, perhaps an object in in the drawers.

Ciel shifted slightly, trying to get himself at least a little bit more comfortable. His wrists were almost numb by now. He was also cold, and lay on the floor didn't helping his slight trembling. Getting anxious because there was just no way to get the material away from his mouth, Ciel wanted nothing more than to finally call Sebastian.

Both men glanced at him when they noticed his movement, but didn't react in the slightest. The blond man finally came back. When Ciel looked at him, his visible eye widened. The cloth tied over his mouth suppressed his gasp.

"Cas, are you serious?" the black haired man without the mask sounded as shocked as Ciel was.

The blond man, Cas, approached them without a word, a large, silver knife with a black handle in his palm. He handed the weapon to the masked companion.

Will took it after a moment of hesitation, though the look on his face clearly reflected his uncertainty. "But… do you think that-"

He was interrupted by the other man's cold voice. "Kill her. You messed up, you face the consequences. She saw my face, and she saw Nero's face. There is no way we can let her go now."

Cas' hand briefly touched the black haired man's shoulder. "Let's leave him to get over with it," he commented coolly. "We will come back in a half an hour."

Nero nodded his head, briefly glancing at Will, and then Ciel, before following the other man to the door.

Ciel watched them with disbelief. How the hell did it come to this? It was supposed to be a quick and simple mission of capturing the culprit. Instead, here he was, restrained, alone, and about to get _murdered_.

Will cursed silently. He wasn't looking at Ciel as he began to nervously pace around the room. Ciel tried to free his wrists vainly; they were bound too tightly.

He almost wanted to laugh at the hopelessness of the whole situation. It was so pathetic, as he literally couldn't do _anything_. Still, he wasn't as anxious as he probably should be. Maybe it was because he could see the man's hesitation? There was no denying it – he clearly didn't look comfortable with the task he was left to do.

"This is a bit stupid, all the blood will make this place so messy."

Ciel was actually startled by the sudden, slightly trembling voice. He looked up, staring at the man who was apparently talking to himself now, still pacing around. He suddenly walked further away, disappearing from Ciel's sight for a moment. When he came back, he had a glass vial and a piece of material in his hand.

Ciel felt uneasiness wash over him, as the man approached him and he immediately tried to move away, acting on instinct. Will crouched down, still not sparing him a glance, too occupied with opening the vial and pouring its content onto the cloth.

"I'm just going to take your mystery away," Will said, almost chuckling, even though his voice sounded unsure. "You won't even feel it, overdose is painless…"

That was when it finally sank down, and Ciel understood what the man was really trying to do. He started crawling away from Will, but in a matter of seconds the man's strong arm stopped him, forcing him back on the floor again, not letting him move.

"Stop moving!" Will screamed at him harshly.

Ciel shut his revealed eye instinctively, startled by the sudden loud yell, but never stopped trying to escape. Soon, he was totally overpowered, the man at least twice his size finally completely restraining any of his movements. The piece of cloth, firmly tied over his mouth was suddenly ripped away in a rough manner.

"Seb-nghh," he choked, attempting to use his only chance. He didn't get to finish, as a richly chloroform drenched rag was strongly pressed into his mouth and nose.

He tried not to breathe the toxin in, still weakly struggling, a futile attempt because one can only suppress it for so long. He gasped involuntary, instinctively trying to take a deep breath as cold hands wrapped themselves around his neck, squeezing, as if trying to crush his throat. The familiar sweet smell made him feel sick.

This time, he felt the effects of the drug much sooner. The weakness, dizziness and nausea appeared almost immediately. All his movements soon ceased as he lost the feeling in all of his limbs, completely numb. If not for the fact that he was already laying down on the floor, he would probably fall over. Black spots appeared in front of his eyes, taking away yet another one of his five senses. He could actually hear his racing, fluttering heart now, so loud and erratic as if it was going to shatter.

It took less time for him to lose consciousness, he was sure of it.

* * *

"These are some nasty looking bruises…"

A glowed hand delicately stroked the painful looking marks on the boy's pale throat, clearly left by someone else's hands.

As if in response, an incoherent mumble left Ciel's mouth, his head lulling to the side. The gentle palm slowly caressed his cheek and he subconsciously tried to lean into this touch a little more. Ciel's eyelids fluttered slightly; a clear sign that he was just waking up.

"Master…" he suddenly heard a silent purr, close to his ear.

He opened his uncovered eye slowly. The first thing he noticed was the demon's face, leaning over him; as familiar as always and completely void of emotions. His hands were free now. He realized that he lay down on the floor, his head on the surprisingly comfortable demon's lap.

"I am very sorry for being late, Master," Sebastian whispered to him, and for some odd reason it sounded completely angelic to Ciel. "How are you feeling?"

Ciel had slight problems with grasping the whole situation; his mind just didn't seem to work properly. He also felt sick and nauseous. Looking around, he noticed the bare, dirty walls of the room. It took a few good moments for him to finally remember how he ended up like this. He recalled when that man, Will, tried to kill him with chloroform overdose. Then, there was nothingness.

Instead of replying to demon's question, he looked at him, an unreadable expression on his face. "How did you find me?" he finally asked. "I couldn't… call you," he murmured.

"If I couldn't do this much at least, well then what kind of butler would I be?" replied Sebastian, his fingers now playing with Ciel's hair.

Ciel murmured something in response, which sounded strangely like 'a useless one', but it was impossible to understand. He didn't make any effort to get up. Appearing to be in some sort of daze, he was almost at the verge of falling asleep.

The demon stared at his unnaturally dilated pupils. He could also sense the boy's still erratic pulse. He knew they were all symptoms of exposure to the toxin. A toxin that could've been deadly, if he arrived seconds later than he did.

"If you'd just left me… You would have my soul by now," Ciel suddenly murmured, his voice however, lacking any kind of concern. If anything, he seemed slightly surprised.

Sebastian didn't reply to that statement and simply kept stroking his hair.

Ciel decided not to pursue the topic. "What about those men?" he asked instead.

"They are all in the other room. Unable to escape," told him the demon. "I thought it would be best to wait for your instructions, my Lord."

Ciel nodded, agreeing with him. "Scotland Yard needs to know I've solved this case."

"Master, I think I've found out something that may interest you," said Sebastian. Without waiting for a response, he continued. "In the second room, there is quite a wide range of… trophies," he began.

"What?" muttered Ciel, his voice laced with confusion, clearly not understanding. "What do you mean by that?"

"I believe each trophy is an item that belonged to the victims. They were all collecting them, as a kind of proof. There were mostly simply things… A hairclip, a bracelet, a necklace…"

"Necklace?" Ciel's eye widened slightly, shock and sudden realization portrayed on his face. "One of the girls we talked to claimed that her necklace was missing, even suspecting that it might've been a culprit who took it!"

"This is correct, Master."

"But… why? Why would they do something like that?" Ciel shook his head.

"I believe they were playing a game, my Lord. In the second room, there is also a board… with scores written all over it. The winning person is obviously the one with the most trophies," explained Sebastian, his voice and expression neutral.

Ciel eyed him with disbelief. "It was… all the game to them? All those girls… Are you serious?" he gasped, quickly sitting up.

Black spots immediately appeared in front of his vision, and only his butler's strong arms prevented him from falling over.

"You shouldn't get up so suddenly, my Lord," reprimanded Sebastian, his tone however sounding oddly more concerned, instead of commanding. "The chloroform hasn't completely worn off yet."

Ciel angrily slapped his hands away and stood up. He immediately had to lean against the wall, the dizziness making it impossible for him to stand on his own.

"This is so sick," he hissed, the hint of anger impossible to be missed. "They will pay for it dearly. Go inform the Scotland Yard, right now. Tell them to come here immediately!" he demanded.

Sebastian looked at him, clearly not too convinced it was a good idea. "Master, are you sure you will be okay on your own here?" he asked.

"Of course," snapped Ciel impatiently. "I can deal with this. Just go and hurry up, this is an order."

Sebastian bowed his head slightly. "As you wish, Master," he commented simply, gracefully getting up and heading towards the door, disappearing soon.

Ciel took a deep breath, closing his eyes for a few seconds. Now the shock had faded slightly, he was getting more and more angry. He just wanted to see them pay for what they did.

When the nausea finally ceased a little bit, he looked around the building, his natural curiosity making him want to explore this place. He could see bloodstains on the floor, where he was laying down. He instinctively winced, the image reminding him of the pain radiating from the back of his head.

Without thinking, he approached the door, opening it and walking to the second room. He immediately located three men, all on the floor, slumped against the wall and completely restrained.

"You should be already dead, you bitch!" one of them growled, but Ciel didn't pay enough attention to know which on of them said it.

Not looking at them, Ciel walked towards the board, with messily written scores over it and a large shelve, filled with many kinds of items, most of them being woman's jewelry. The tapping sound of high heels echoing in the room seemed oddly loud to him.

"Do you think anyone will believe you? You even look like a whore!" the man with black hair yelled angrily, trying to provoke him.

Ciel suddenly turned around and stared right at them. Narrowing his eyes, he approached them, leaning down slightly to get a better look.

"I am not even a girl," he said, voice cold and collected, yet baring a hint of amusement.

"What?" one of them murmured, as if not sure he heard right.

A nasty smirk appeared on Ciel's face. "What, you don't believe me?" he whispered, purposefully lowering his voice. His hand made its way to the skirt, clutching the frill along the bottom of it, as if considering lifting it up. "Maybe you need _proof_?" he added huskily and then laughed.

Still, the laugh didn't appear to have any humor in it, sounding more hysterical than anything. Ciel couldn't help but think 'What am I doing?' when he stood in front of them, acting like this. He didn't know what was wrong with him, why he couldn't act in a calm and stable manner, as always. Maybe it was because of the drug, that his acting was out of character. Or maybe just this case was making him too emotional, bringing back too many memories. He didn't know.

He saw it in their reaction then. They believed him; he had no doubts about it. Even though his voice usually did sound a bit girly, he now made every effort to make it sound at least a little more masculine.

Cas, the one who ordered killing Ciel, laughed rudely, looking at his masked companion. "Congratulations, Will, really, this is just amazing!" he exclaimed. "You fucking kissed and molested a damn male!"

The smirk immediately disappeared from Ciel's face upon hearing these words. He suddenly seemed paler.

Kissed? Molested? When did such thing… His heart suddenly started racing again, a wave of anxiety giving him a familiar, uncomfortable choking sensation. He couldn't remember. He had no recollection of such events. It must have happened when he was unconscious. He suddenly felt even sicker.

"Yeah, Will, how was it, did you enjoy yourself?" the other man asked, but Ciel couldn't even comprehend his words, too caught up in his own mind.

"Shut the hell up, I bet none of you would be able to tell, either!"

Again. _Again_. It happened again, someone dared to lay a finger on him, even though it was never supposed to be like this, even though it was never supposed to happen again! His nervousness was quickly replaced by anger. Just like it often happened back in Bethlehem. All his composure was quickly lost, so was the self-control.

His now empty, cloudy looking eyes narrowed and he suddenly leaned down, roughly ripping away the white mask from the man's face in one swift movement, letting it fall to the ground. Ciel then gripped the man's chin; his sharp nails clawing into his skin painfully, forcing the criminal to look at him.

"Are you happy now?" he hissed, his voice completely cold and full of fury. "Did you had a good time, playing with others' like this, _fucking_ with them, ruining their lives?"

If he could hear himself now, he probably wouldn't recognize his own voice, and it wasn't only for the fact that he rarely used swear words. It was mainly because of how different his voice actually sounded; completely distant and detached, yet angry.

"What the hell do you-" the man started, his voice not so sure anymore.

The sound of a loud snap echoed in the room, Ciel's palm colliding with Will's cheek painfully.

"Answer me!" Ciel yelled, not even aware of the fact that he had raised his voice.

"I, why the fuck do you-"

Another hit. He put so much force into it that his hand began to hurt.

"Wrong!" he growled, his uncovered eye not leaving the man for a second. "That's not what I asked!"

Cas and Nero exchanged glances, observing the scene without uttering a single word.

The blond man stared at him for a long moment, before shaking his head. "You're completely mad. You should be send to some sort of Asylum," he murmured with hatred and annoyance. "Do you dress this way on purpose, to seduce men? Are you a male whore?" he added with pure disgust.

To Asylum. _Asylum_. Oh, he'd already been there. Provocative? Seduce? _Whore_. He heard that, too. And he'd been called that name before, more than once. There was, however, a difference this time. He did not have to put up with all this. He had the power to stop it and he was never going to be a defenseless child ever again.

Seconds passed when Ciel suddenly moved; his expression full of absolute loathsomeness. The last shreds of control left him, and without thinking, he kicked the man in the face; solid leather boot making his action far more painful, the male's moan assured him of that. The strength of his kick sent the man to the floor, blood running freely from what appeared to be a broken nose.

"What now?" snarled Ciel. "How does it feel? How does it feel to be the one writhing on the floor, unable to do a thing, at someone's mercy?" He made a few steps, walking over to the criminal, as if he was circling prey.

The man with black haired looked at Ciel; uneasiness and slight concern on his face. "I think he already gets it, so maybe-"

"Silence!" interrupted Ciel, his tone impatient. "Your little game is over, quite literally," he added.

Crouching down, he harshly gripped the blond man's hair, forcefully pulling his head up off the floor a little bit, making him look straight into his uncovered eye.

"How dared you?" he whispered, his voice now barely audible, low and threatening. "How dared you?" he repeated, suddenly sounding distant again.

He started to feel more dissociated again, somehow detached from the reality as the memories started to come back, again. He remembered being trapped in the dark room, tied to the bed; he remembered being restrained in the bathroom, all to clearly, the images all too realistic.

"Let go off me, you mad bitch, you will get into trouble for-"

"I wouldn't make him any angrier if I was you, that kid is just…" murmured another man.

Ciel didn't hear him. He only heard the first one. In fact, he only heard the words 'mad bitch', his mind now too cloudy to fully comprehend everything else.

"You really have no idea who you are dealing with. Mad?" he hissed, smirking, almost wanting to laugh again. "I will show you just how mad I can be," he added.

Still gripping the restrained man's hair, in one rough movement he smashed his face against the floor, causing the man to let a yelp of pain. Without thinking, he repeated the action, almost knocking him out as a result.

"Are you enjoying yourself now?!" he screamed at him.

The man winced, spitting up blood and blinking, probably trying to get rid of his blurred vision.

"Tell me! Talk before I lose my temper and kill you, you perverted son of a bitch!"

Ciel, apparently still not satisfied, was about to repeat his action once again, but something stopped him. Strong arms suddenly were on him, taking him away from the injured man.

"Master, I think this is enough," a soft voice spoke, close to his ear. He didn't even have to turn around, immediately recognizing whom it belonged to.

Ciel shook his head, struggling, kicking and trying to get free, anger giving him more strength. "Let go!" he yelled, frustrated. "You don't understand anything!"

"You have to calm down, my Lord. Scotland Yard will be here any minute," Sebastian said, this time louder. His clutch on Ciel only tightened. "You will ruin your reputation if you don't get a grip on yourself," he added slowly, as if trying to make sure that the boy really understood the situation.

Ciel said nothing, but stopped trying to get away, finally coming to his senses. He didn't even have the chance to react before Sebastian quickly scooped him up into his arms. At this gesture Ciel crossed his own arms, a scowl appearing on his face immediately.

"I think you will be more comfortable in the other room," the demon said simply, carrying him out.

Closing the door as they walked into the second room, Sebastian carefully put Ciel down. Without a word, Ciel slumped down the wall, clearly resigned, and sat on the floor. He looked at his bloodied palms before folding his knees and letting his head rest on them.

"I don't know… why I snapped like that," he muttered finally. "He just started calling me those names and…" he broke off, sighing.

Sebastian crouched down next to him. "I think it's because this case deals with a topic that is particularly sensitive to you, Master," he said, staring at the boy.

Ciel lifted his head up a little bit and mindlessly stared at the opposite wall. "I just feel… so dirty again," he muttered, barely audible. "My lips, my whole body feel tainted because they said that he kissed me and… nghmm-"

He was interrupted as the demon's mouth was suddenly on his own, merely for a brief second, and before he could even utter a word he felt those lips on his neck, moving to the bruises he had there.

His uncovered eye widened in shock. "What-" he gasped with disbelief, finally composing himself and pushing the demon away. "How dare… What do you think you are-"

The demon stared at him, no sign of guilt on his face. "Do they still feel tainted?" he asked carelessly, as if inquiring about the weather.

Ciel opened his mouth and closed it, as if not knowing what to say. He moved away slightly, not looking at his butler. "Get away," he finally murmured, the uneasiness he was trying to hide clearly portrayed on his face.

"They don't, do they?" Sebastian spoke again, amused by Ciel's reaction.

"They do, now they feel tainted by you!" snapped finally Ciel, growling. His gaze was still on the opposite wall.

"Lies," whispered the demon. "I can tell when you are lying, _Master_," he commented, looking as if he enjoyed teasing the boy more than he should.

Ciel, clearly angry now, stood up. "Don't forget your place, servant," he said coldly. "You are nothing but that. And you never will be. I don't know what made you think that you have rights to-".

Once again, he didn't get to finish the sentence, because the door opened and the small room began to fill with people from Scotland Yard.

One of the men, probably the one who was in charge, approached Ciel immediately. He had neat dark grey hair and brown eyes. He was wearing glasses and was dressed in a black suit. Ciel immediately recognized him as Arthur Randall.

"We got the information that the serial rapist case-"

"Was solved by me," said loudly Ciel. He straightened up proudly, forgetting all about his current appearance because of the surrounding chaos.

Randall glared at him skeptically, scrutinizing his look. "Just who…"

Ciel, once again, didn't let him finish the sentence. "Ciel. Ciel Phantomhive. The Queen's Watchdog," he said with confidence and a hint of impatience.

The man winced slightly, unable to hide the obvious dislike directed at the mentioned name. "But isn't he a male?" he finally asked.

An understanding and realization appeared in Ciel's eyes. "My current appearance doesn't signify," he finally murmured, clearly a bit embarrassed. "My job is done here," he added.

He began to walk towards the door, passing by the shocked Scotland Yard members. Sebastian followed him.

* * *

"_Who are you…?" he asked, unsure._

_He stared at the man standing in front of him, dressed in a black suit with black and white straps on the collar and a dark hat, decorated with a small red ribbon. He had long white hair, all the way up to his waist and a fringe hiding his eyes. Somehow, he looked a bit familiar, but Ciel couldn't tell for sure._

_The stranger giggled madly. "I am The Hatter," he said finally, as if it was the most obvious thing in the entire world. "And I have a message, from The Cat. He's dead and asked me-"_

"_W-what?" Ciel gasped with shock, clearly upset about the news. "What happ-"_

"_Do not interrupt!" The Hatter snapped, not letting the boy finish his sentence. Suppressing another giggle, he continued. "He's dead, but before it happened, he asked me to pass another message to you. Listen." He blinked, licking his lips. "'__Bravery and I are not on intimate terms – my natural curiosity is tempered with caution, thus I've lived long. But now, ignoring my instinct to flee or fib, I speak the truth without regard to consequence; your courage deserves no less. You've suffered great pain, and you've caused some. You've endured deep grief and known only be your Other Self - feelings of guilt, but you will be tested by a more wrenching anguish. There is __worse__ to come. You and your Other Self cannot both survive; you are two parts of the same*'," he cut off awkwardly._

_Ciel watched him intensely, only after a long moment noticing the man went silent. "Part of the same? Same what?" he whispered, __his eyes widening, making him look like a deer caught in a trap._

_The Hatter giggled, a wide grin on his face. "I have no idea! He died before he could tell me!" he exclaimed, his voice amused. He suddenly turned away, waving at Ciel. "I need to go now so good luck and-"_

"_But, please, wait a minute, I-"_

"_Goodbye! By the way, your__ hair wants cutting, and perhaps your neck could use a trim*!" The Hatted said, his fingers suddenly on Ciel's hair, pulling at it harshly, making him wince in pain._

_Before Ciel could react, the man disappeared. _

_Suddenly, something… changed. He couldn't see it yet. But somehow, he could feel it; the erratically fluttering heartbeat was telling him so. His previously innocent appearance was ruined now. It was because of the weapon, making him look like he was some unstable, psychotic child. The large blade was still in his hand; he was gripping it hard, as if his life depended on it. _

_He began to walk away from the pond, heading deeper into the forest. The place didn't seem so peaceful anymore. It was much darker. Wild. Ciel couldn't tell if it was because of the trees, which seemed oddly taller, or just the fact that sun was nowhere to be seen. All the beautiful, colorful flowers were gone. Even the grass, it wasn't as green anymore; it had a sickly, unhealthy darkish shade. All the birds were gone, singing changed into a dreadful silence, accompanied only by his footsteps and breathing._

_What was worse, however, was the smell. Ciel had no trouble recognizing it, as it was making him nauseous. It was the scent of rot, decay and… blood. _

_He wanted to leave this place. It wasn't the same anymore. It wasn't as comforting as it used to be, it wasn't his shelter anymore._

_The sound of rushing water led him off the path, straight into further gloom and to the river. His breath hitched when he saw it. The pure, clean water was rapidly changing its color, some invisible force dying it crimson._

_Instinctively, he started to run, wanting nothing more than to be away from the sound of fast flowing blood. Blindly trying to escape, he wasn't even paying attention where he was heading, and to his surprise, he ended up in the place where he was in the beginning. _

_A field of dead flowers. Dark, yet cloudless sky. Ruined fountain with filthy, tainted water and a broken angel statue, the fragile figure crushed into many little pieces. And there was smoke in the air, irritating his lungs, tricking his sight. He could suddenly see it; it wasn't too far away. The high, angrily red flames were spreading fast, wrecking the forest. It was terrifying him. How could he not notice before?_

_Escape. Flight. Run. He broke into a sprint; now completely panicky and shaky, even though he knew this was the worst thing to do._

_But the decay was inescapable, the stench of destruction everywhere. When he suddenly tripped and looked down, his face got even paler. A corpse. Unmoving, still, silent… And then another once, close to the first one. And another… Too shocked to even care whom they belonged to, he immediately stepped back. Turning away, he ran into another direction._

_It wasn't paradise anymore. It was hell. Wonderland was shattered._

* * *

Loud, erratic gasps along with the sound of heavy rain outside the window could be heard in the bedroom. The curtains, blue and decorated in accordance with the newest fashion trends, were closed, however if one opened them, he would only see the darkness of the night. The small, pale body was twisting, kicking at the covers, trying to _escape, _fingernails grasping the white sheets, as if attempting to claw away from the place of horror. The scream echoed in the room.

As if on cue, the wooden door opened and in the matter of seconds, Sebastian was standing beside the bed. He placed a silver candleholder that had seven candles upon it on the nightstand, this action immediately lightning the room, bathing the walls in a soft yellow glow. The dark haired male's gaze scrutinized Ciel from head to tone, immediately noticing all the signs of distress. A look of surprise appeared on his face when he noticed that Ciel's eyes were wide open. However, they seemed completely hazy and unfocused, as if they weren't seeing any of real surroundings.

"Master?" He touched the thrashing boy's shoulder gently. When it didn't have any effect, he shook Ciel's shoulder harder. "Master, what's wrong?" His tone now sounded a bit concerned.

Ciel moaned, clearly distressed, and instinctively lashed out, his hand hitting Sebastian in the face. The hit itself was quite weak, more so Ciel's sharp nails that were a little bit painful when they scratched against the skin. Sebastian probably could've avoided it, if he weren't so distracted by the fact that he didn't know what was actually wrong with Ciel.

Without a wince, Sebastian immediately and effortlessly pinned Ciel's arms to his sides. After a long moment, the boy finally stilled. Sebastian let go of his arms, watching him intensely. Ciel blinked, appearing completely dazed, but his gaze was a bit clearer and focused as he stared at the demon.

"Sebastian." A hoarse whisper finally escaped Ciel's lips.

"Are you alright, Master?" Sebastian asked, his quite, silky voice now completely void of emotions.

Ciel didn't respond. He wasn't even looking at him, trying to control his shivering body. His eyes, suddenly seeming unnaturally glossy, were slightly red. Perhaps, it was only due to tiredness for Ciel Phantomhive _never_ cried, no, not after he promised he wouldn't.

"Master?" The demon's hand was suddenly on his, trying to get his attention. "Master, what happened?"

Ciel snatched his hand away quite violently. "Just a nightmare," he murmured finally, his tone firm. He was still trying to get his erratic breathing under control.

Sebastian just shook his head. "You weren't sleeping, my Lord," he replied. "But it's not the first time it happened, is it? Can you remember? When you were ill and-"

"No," whispered Ciel. "It was just a dream. You said it yourself last time. You said it wasn't real," he insisted childishly, forcing a smile, as if not wanting to accept the truth.

Sebastian, however, seemed to be determined to explain things. "Master, you were awake. But yes, it wasn't real. You were…" he hesitated a little bit. "Hallucinating," he finally explained, his voice a bit uncertain, as if he wasn't sure what reaction he should expect from they boy.

"No," repeated meekly Ciel, shaking his head. "It was… such a weird dream," he chuckled humorlessly, rubbing his eyes, inclined on not letting the tears escape. "The… The Cat, he died. And the message said that something bad is going to happen, that there is worse to come. I have done something horrible and only my Other Self knows, it, I just can't remember," he kept rambling. "And that me and my Other Self can't both survive… I don't understand it, though," he muttered, unable to stop his palms from trembling. "There was so much blood and the fire…"

Sebastian looked deep in thought, observing Ciel, somehow looking not as composed as always. "There is no need to worry, Master," he said finally, making his voice sound convincing. "We will figure something out if this continues. You don't have to think about any of this, they are just-"

Ciel, suddenly looking angry, narrowed his eyes. "Do you think I have gone mad and I see things?! Maybe you also think that I should rot in the Asylum?!" he shouted with fury, his tone full of accusation.

"No, Master," replied Sebastian, in a quiet, comforting voice, as oppose to Ciel. "You can trust me. You know this. I would never allow anyone to send you back to this place."

Ciel stared at him, seeming a bit mistrustful and uncertain. "You will never betray me," he murmured silently, subconsciously repeating Sebastian's earlier words, all anger gone now.

"Until the very end," promised the demon, his gaze never leaving the boy.

Ciel nodded slowly, his palm gripping the bed sheet. They just sat there, not speaking for a few moments, before the demon broke the silence.

"Let me help you change, Master," he said simply, getting up and disappearing from Ciel's sight for a few seconds.

Ciel didn't even notice Sebastian moving, still too dazed and confused. To him, the fresh clothes in Sebastian's hands seemed to appear out of nowhere. Or maybe he just didn't pay enough attention to see him opening the wardrobe…

The cool hand of the demon suddenly brushed his neck when the demon started unbuttoning his nightshirt, soaked with cold sweat. This time, Ciel didn't even flinch because of the touch, simply allowing it, even when the demon rubbed his chin, just like he would probably do to a favorite pet. He couldn't really tell when the nightshirt was taken off him completely, only to be replaced by a fresh one, it just happened too quickly. Or maybe his mind was just working too slowly.

"Do you want me to bring you another blanket, Young Master?" inquired Sebastian, now buttoning up the new cloth, fully aware of the boy's trembling form.

"No," murmured finally Ciel, still unseeingly looking at the floor with hazy eyes, one royal blue, and the other violet with a contract mark embedded inside. "But… get me something to drink," he added, now sounding exhausted.

Demon smirked lightly when he turned around, not letting his master see it. Of course, he knew exactly what Ciel meant by "something to drink". He was just too embarrassed to ask for a glass of warm milk. Ironically, in Sebastian's eyes, the unwillingness to say it was what actually made him look childish, not the milk itself. It was a well known fact that such a drink may aid peaceful sleep as it consisted of tryptophan.

"Of course, my Lord," he said simply, disappearing in the doorway.

When he came back, Ciel was still exactly in the same position, staring into nothingness, not even noticing him when he had the glass full of milk in front of the boy's eyes. Sighing, he placed it on the nightstand so Ciel could reach for it anytime, and sat on the bed.

Sebastian was just about to speak, when Ciel suddenly shifted and stared at him, wide eyes filled with despair.

"I don't know what's wrong with me," Ciel whispered, his usual cold and composed demeanor completely gone. "Those… dreams, visions, I don't know… they happened in the Asylum first," he murmured, part of him hating himself for letting himself act like this around Sebastian. Still, he just couldn't bring himself to care enough to stop, the need for any kind of comfort and reassurance much too strong to resist.

Sebastian murmured something in fake understanding, watching Ciel and his reactions with curiosity. "Master, something always triggers them, am I right? Some stressful event?" he asked, even though he was fully aware of the fact that he was right.

Upon hearing those words, much to his horror and shame, Ciel felt his eyes fill with tears once again. It was true. He remembered clearly when it happened for the first time, too clearly, right after the assault. Unable to say anything, too afraid to trust his voice, he just nodded his head.

This was nothing new to Sebastian. He already figured it out.

"It's possible then that stress causes it, Master," he said comfortingly, his hand reaching out to brush a strand of hair from Ciel's face. "Don't be upset, please," he added reassuringly.

"What if they… I mean, in the Asylum, what if they had really driven me mad, and things are just going to get worse…?" he mumbled semi coherently. He felt like a complete mess now.

Before Sebastian had a chance to reply, Ciel crawled towards him and climbed onto his lap, straddling his thighs; cold fragile body pressing into his, as if trying to hide from everything in the only place of comfort he could think of.

_Yes, crawl to me, doll. On your knees._

Oh, but of course, he had every intention of providing it. How could he deny it at least that much, when his fragile prey just completely exposed all its vulnerabilities to him? So tragic, so broken and… so trustful and naïve, completely giving in to him. He could sense how troubled and confused its mind was, how absolutely devastated it seemed right now. The extreme mood shifts, the uncontrolled aggression, the hallucinations. Clearly, the mental health of his little victim kept getting worse. He didn't mind. As long as it didn't ruin the taste of its soul. It was only making things easier for him, he didn't even have to put much effort into attaching more and more strings to his porcelain doll because the doll was actually willing to be enslaved, all its action were proving so. Those big blue and violet irises… staring at him, so despaired and lost, how prettily and sweetly they mirrored its pain. And the innocence; too pure, too perfect, it was begging him to taint it. How tempting it was to play with the wide-eyed porcelain doll now, instead of waiting. To use it, to damage it, to… devour it.

* * *

*_These quotes come from the game "American McGee's Alice". I do not own them._


	11. Chapter 10

_AU: Thank you for all the reviews, favs and follows! Hope you enjoy this chapter.  
_

_Thank you very, very much for beta-reading, Shattered Apocalypse!_

* * *

It'd been days since Ciel solved the serial rapists' case. He tried to forget about it, as well as about his little breakdown. He still felt embarrassed about how he completely lost control over his emotions and then crawled onto the demon's lap seeking comfort, only to fall asleep there shortly after, too exhausted to even think about the consequences.

Sebastian kept insisting that he should rest more. Even though at first Ciel tried to refuse to listen to him and complained a lot, he went along with it after all. Due to this, Sebastian was always waking him up three hours later than he used to and never allowed him to push himself too hard when working on bringing the company back. It appeared to be helping. For now. He hadn't suffered from any… _hallucinations_ ever since. So Ciel complied with it all.

That morning was surprisingly nice, no signs of dark clouds. Instead, some shy sunrays could be noticed, but only if Ciel's curtains were opened and if he wasn't currently in blissful slumber, unaware of any surroundings.

That was until a loud crush brutally brought him back to the reality. And then voices. Several voices. He immediately sat up, disoriented, his heart racing wildly in his chest. He rubbed his eyes, feeling nothing but confusion mixed with anxiety. He pushed away the covers and got off the bed. Almost instinctively, he grabbed the plush rabbit. Not caring about being barefoot and dressed only in a nightshirt, he left the room, in search for the source of such noise.

He finally found it, at the end of the corridor. Or perhaps 'them' would be a much appropriate word. There were three people he didn't recognize there. There was a girl, dressed in black and white maid's clothes, with dark red hair and glasses. Next to her was a young boy with messy strawberry-blond hair, clipped back with a few pins on the sides. He was wearing a plain top and plaid pants, along with black boots, which were knee high. The last person seemed a bit older than them. He was tall and appeared to be quite well built. He had blonde hair and had a chef's white outfit on. There was some glass on the floor, and it looked like it used to be a vase before. In the middle of all this, stood Sebastian, a palm covering his eyes, as if he was praying for patience and wanting nothing more than to leave.

A sudden squeal startled Ciel, and suddenly all eyes were on him.

Sebastian quickly composed himself and looked at him. "Master-" he began but was suddenly interrupted by three excited voices.

"_M-master?!"_

"Didn't think he was that young."

"Mister Sebastian, is that Young Master?!"

Ciel blinked, still a little bit groggy from his sleep, and stared at the strangers, then at the broken glass, and then back at them once again. "Sebastian, who are these people?" he managed to ask, finally composing himself, his tone weak and confused, but held no anger.

Before he could be interrupted again, the demon began to explain. "Your new servants, Master," he said, his voice suggesting that he already regretted hiring them. "This is Mey-Rin, the maid," he gestured to the girl standing next to him, who bowed her head slightly, a light blush appearing on her cheeks. Sebastian then turned to the boy. "His name is Finnian, he will be the gardener," he said, and as if in response, a shy smile showed up on the boy's face. Sebastian finally looked at the man standing to the right, who saluted, his stare locked on Ciel. "And that's Bard, your chef from now on. As I told you earlier, I took charge of hiring them, to help out at the mansion."

Ciel's gaze was scrutinizing the people in front of him for a long moment. He sighed, finally speaking. "I see. Very well then," he murmured, his voice neutral, with a hint of tiredness.

"I'm so h-happy to finally meet you, Young Master a-and I just want to say thank you because-"

One of the new servants began to speak, but Sebastian immediately interrupted. "There will still be time for that a bit later," he said firmly, still appearing patient, even though his eyes said otherwise, if one looked close enough.

He approached Ciel quickly, placing his arm on the boy's shoulder gently. "Master, it's still very early, so you should go back to bed and sleep some more," he suggested, his voice, however, not commanding in any way.

"But I…" Ciel cut off abruptly, suddenly forgetting what was it that he wanted to say. "Fine," he sighed.

Without another word, he allowed the demon to lead him back into the bedroom and tuck him into bed.

A second loud noise was heard from the corridor, but this time Ciel didn't even flinch.

* * *

Ciel was eating his dinner in silence, no signs of his usual temperament; mechanic-like movements and unfocused gaze instead. It was clear that he wasn't enjoying his meal, even though it looked (and perhaps it was) absolutely delicious. It seemed that he was eating merely because it was necessary, almost like breathing.

"Master, I know it may not be the best time to tell you this, but I believe you should find out about it as soon as possible."

When he suddenly heard the voice belonging to his butler, he didn't even look up, simply continuing with the meal.

There was a soft sigh, and then the butler continued, in a tone void of emotions. "I am not sure if you can remember but while we were… enjoying ourselves at the carnival's ball, in one of the guest rooms, someone opened the door without knocking and saw us."

Ciel's reaction was instantaneous. The fork in his hand suddenly stilled, his frame getting completely stiffed.

"Today, I found out that there are already certain rumors related to it. It would appear that some people believe that you have an inappropriate relationship with-"

He didn't get to finish. In one swift movement, Ciel sent his plate with not even half finished food to the floor. A sound of glass being shattered echoed in the room, accompanied by the sudden noise of the chair being moved, as Ciel stood up.

"Master-"

Ciel didn't even turn around, leaving the room as quickly as possible. Shortly after, there was the loud sound of a door being shut.

* * *

Ciel spent hours there, refusing to leave the room; sitting on the floor, slumped against the door. He didn't even know how he felt anymore. Whether it was shock, annoyance, or shame, he didn't know. Perhaps it was all of those feelings. How could he have let such a thing happen? He disgraced his family name. He disgraced himself.

His eyes were shut tight, his hands subconsciously and quite painfully tugging at his hair. There were so many different thoughts going through his head at the moment that he was unable think straight.

No... This was nothing. He could deal with this. He went through worse things, he just had to get a grip of himself. He was Earl Ciel Phantomhive; he wouldn't let some rumors damage his reputation, he wouldn't hide in a corner like a scared child. He was going to walk through the street with his chin high, and look people in the eye.

Taking a deep breath, Ciel slowly got himself off the floor. When he opened the door, his expression was that of a mild look of surprise as he stood face to face with the demon. His eyes then narrowed slightly and he walked past him.

"Don't you dare show your face to me now," he said coldly, not even turning around to look at his butler.

He went straight to the office and began working on the projects for Funtom Co., desperately trying to take his mind off things.

* * *

Two hours later, just when he was finishing a report, a loud noise interrupted his task. Before he even had the chance to answer, the door opened.

Sebastian was standing in the doorway, a neutral expression on his face.

"Master, I just wanted to remind you that you have a scheduled meeting today, four o'clock with-"

"I know about that," Ciel bitterly replied, not letting his butler finish the sentence. He tilted his head to the side a bit, scrutinizing his butler. A sneer appeared on his face. "How dare you make me repeat my orders, anyway?" he muttered, clearly annoyed. "I told you not to show your face to me, didn't I?"

Sebastian gave a simple nod before answering. "You did, my Lord, however, you did not specify how long-"

A glass vase was suddenly thrown in his direction. It was only thanks to his fast reflexes that it hit the door instead of him. The sound of shattering glass echoed against the walls.

"Get the hell out," snarled Ciel, losing the last shreds of his patience.

Sebastian left the room.

* * *

All the negotiations went well and the meeting was soon over. Ciel's arms were resting on the chess table, a barely visible smirk on his face.

"Sebastian," he said quietly, suppressing a yawn and stretching.

He didn't have to wait long. In exactly three seconds, the demon appeared in the room and approached him, standing by his chair.

"Is there anything I can assist you with, my Lord?" he asked neutrally, observing Ciel.

Ciel's hand lazily knocked over some of the chess pieces, letting them fall to the floor. His fingers then started tapping on the black and white board.

"There is no other reason I would ever call you," he replied in an uncaring tone of the voice. "Now…" he began, his voice a bit colder and somehow oddly vicious. "I want you to find the person who spread that disgusting rumor about me." His eyes flashed dangerously, and his sharp nails clawed at the chessboard. "And then, I want you to have that person declared mentally ill and locked up in the Asylum. I do not care what you have to do to achieve it but I want it done by tomorrow," Ciel added, turning his gaze to Sebastian.

The demon just stared at him for a few seconds; his expression unreadable but lacking the usual neutrality. Finally, he bowed his head slightly, before answering.

"What a cruel little Master I have…" he purred, a slight smirk appearing on his face.

"Keep those remarks to yourself," Ciel commented harshly. In one, swift movement he roughly ripped the eyepatch off his face, not caring that it dropped on the chessboard. "This is an order, punish this person for trying to ruin my family name," he added.

The pentagram embedded in his marked eye, as if on cue, suddenly flashed vibrant violet. Sebastian unexpectedly leaned down a little bit.

"Yes, Master," he murmured, too huskily for Ciel's liking. His palm was suddenly on the boy's chin, rubbing it with his finger, like he'd done many times to the street cats.

Ciel violently slapped his hand away, but before he had a chance to reprimand the demon, he was already gone. His eyes narrowed with anger.

"Come back here. I want to see it," he demanded.

* * *

He made the demon carry him simply because, as he reasoned, he didn't feel like walking. Secretly, however, he was trying to make things at least a little bit more inconvenient for Sebastian and… he didn't really like how dark it was in this place.

"It's this mansion, Master," said Sebastian, interrupting the silence.

They were now standing in front of the building, just by the door. It wasn't nearly as big as Ciel's mansion but it still had a noble feeling to it. There was quite a large garden surrounding the property.

"Well, good then," murmured Ciel uncaringly, his body, however, subconsciously clinging to the demon a little bit more. "Make it a show for me," he added.

The butler nodded. "As you wish, Master," he replied. "Now please hold on to me really tight, I need to… coax the door into letting us in," he added, briefly looking at the boy.

Ciel sighed ostentatiously but complied with the request, pale hands wrapping themselves around the demon's neck. Sebastian then began to fidget, maneuvering with the door lock, now having one of his arms free. When Ciel was about to question his method, there was a soft clicking sound, and in a matter of seconds the door opened before him. Sebastian's hand was on him again, to make carrying him easier, but Ciel didn't take his hands away from the demon's neck.

Sebastian carried him inside and closed the door after them. The corridor was completely dark and no sounds could be heard in the building. Quite possibly, the occupants were already asleep, for it was very late already.

"Her name is Helen Wakefield. She is twenty-seven years old. Unmarried. She lives on her own," quietly murmured Sebastian.

"A pitiful spinster," commented Ciel dryly. "I expected that. Only people like her take so much pleasure in spreading idiotic gossips because they have nothing else to do. Nobody wants them."

It was quite amazing, how effortlessly the demon was moving in the complete darkness, without any problems at all. Ciel, personally, couldn't see anything at all. The young earl suspected that he had the ability to see in the dark, just like cats. Same with his footsteps. Now they were completely soundless.

The demon was now taking him upstairs, he knew this much. He didn't have any regrets. He didn't regret doing this, this was what he wanted. She deserved this, for trying to make a laughing matter out of him and his name.

He didn't even know when they arrived to the bedroom, it happened too quickly. Sebastian suddenly put him on some cold surface, making him sit on it, and his legs dangled over the side. Ciel guessed it was some sort of dressing table. Sighing, he carelessly kicked his feet, clearly out of boredom.

Sebastian's mouth was suddenly close to his ear. "Please, enjoy the spectacle, Master. You have the front row seat," he whispered.

The demon's eyes flashed violet. He snapped his fingers and suddenly the room was filled with a soft light glow, coming from the candles placed around. Ciel was now able to see what the room really looked like. The only thing that got his attention was a bed in the middle of the room with a sleeping woman in it.

Ciel watched as Sebastian approached the bed, slowly, like a predator circling his prey. The sound of his footsteps was different now. Loud, echoing the walls, as if his shoes were made of metal. A few black feathers fell to the floor. A dark aura seemed to surround him… Ciel couldn't help but feel fascinated by this sight. Disturbingly drawn to it.

The woman, Helen, suddenly stirred, shifting slightly. A few seconds later, her eyes snapped open, filled with fear and confusion. Her gaze immediately focused on the demon, almost as if she expected him to be here. A feared noise escaped her lips as she quickly tried to get up, pushing away the covers.

"W-who are you, w-what are-" her voice was shaking so badly it was hard to make out what she was saying.

Sebastian didn't say anything, giving a smirk in reply and revealing his sharp, inhuman like teeth. He walked closer towards her, slowly, without any rush.

This time, seeing this, she actually screamed; the sound so piercing and loud it made Ciel grimace. The woman, blindly trying to get away in fear, actually cut herself off all possible ways of escape, now standing in the corner of the room, her back pressed to the wall.

"What in God's name do you want f-from me, you demon?" her voice was now nothing more than a whisper, tears of fear visible in her green eyes.

Ciel laughed humorlessly at the accuracy of her comment, getting her attention.

She briefly looked at him, recognition portrayed on her face almost immediately. "It's… you… The Phantom-"

The large mirror next to her shattered to a million pieces, completely unexpectedly, startling her and not letting her finish the sentence.

"Oh my…" murmured Sebastian, letting his gaze linger on the glass for a mere second. "What a mess you have made here, my Lady."

Tears were now freely running down her face. "Please," she began weakly, her whole form trembling.

Ciel made an annoyed 'tch' sound and interrupted her. "Make her finally shut up, Sebastian. It's for the best anyway. It's her big mouth that got her into this position in the first place," he said, his tone cold an uncaring. "Her voice irritates me immensely," he complained.

Sebastian replied with a simple 'Yes, my Lord', before he carelessly ripped the blue bed sheet, making a piece of material out of it perfect for the requested task. He approached the shaking woman and tied it over her mouth, effortlessly making her stop all the weak struggling with his arm.

What happened next was really sudden. Sebastian looked her in the eye, not doing anything but that, and Ciel could see clearly that his hands were now simply placed by his sides. It had only been a few seconds, though Ciel wasn't even sure how much time had actually passed; he was too busy observing the scene right in front of him when the woman started screaming, again. This time, it was a bit different though. It was muffled by the piece of cloth, but it was still clear that it wasn't just a yell of shock and fear. _This _was pure despair and sheer terror.

Sebastian stepped away a little bit and she slumped down the wall, covering her face with her hands, the shrieking unstopped, more tears running down her face.

"What did you do?" asked Ciel, watching Helen Wakefield with an unconcerned expression on his face. His tone of the voice was distant and cool; it was clear that he didn't have any feelings of compassion towards her.

Sebastian turned his gaze on Ciel. "I simply allowed this lady to experience some of her worst fears," he said, in a matter of fact tone.

Ciel cocked his head to the side, watching the woman with disinterest. "I hardly consider this a spectacle worth watching," he murmured. "Honestly, I thought you would come up with something more creative because this is _not _what I expect from the Phantomhive butler when I ask for a show," he complained, clearly bored.

Sebastian respectfully bowed his head, his hand on his chest. "I apologize, Master. However, this is only an introduction for I have just started," he explained.

"Mhm. It better be."

As if on cue, a crimson liquid suddenly started appearing on the floor, as if it was creeping from the cracks in it, soon creating a disturbing pool of what seemed to be blood. Fortunately, Ciel shoes didn't get dirty because he was too far up.

The woman's gaze suddenly seemed clearer and more focused again. She stopped screaming; it was obvious she was breathing with difficulty, the rag making it even harder for her. When she looked at the floor, her eyes widened and she broke into a run towards the closed door.

Sebastian reacted instinctively and it seemed like an effortless task for him. He simply grabbed the woman by her long brown curly hair in one violent movement, not letting her get away. A suppressed moan of pain echoed in the room.

"Oh my, you can't leave just yet," the demon reprimanded her, not letting go when she still struggled.

Helen blindly tried to hit him, make him let go but Sebastian dodged all the hits without a problem. It seemed that the demon soon got bored of this little game. He painfully tugged at the woman's hair, sending her to the floor with a merciless flick of his wrist, ripping away some of the brown locks in this process. He chuckled, seeing brown strands still in his hand and let them fall to the floor.

A choked sound escaped the woman's lips as she tried to get up, struggling because the floor was slick with red liquid.

Ciel watched her, his expression now unreadable.

Sebastian sighed, approaching the woman and suddenly getting a grip on the collar of her nightgown. He made her stand up in a way that was by far not gentle at all, and forcefully dragged her close to the window. He opened the curtains in one swift movement.

"Look closely," he whispered, gripping brown wavy hair again, not letting the woman move her head away.

A horrified gasp could be heard after a few seconds. A hint of curiosity appeared on Ciel's face. He couldn't help but wonder: what was it that she saw there?

The woman started struggling again, trying to escape the demon's grasp, not caring that she was causing herself more pain in the process. With a chuckle, Sebastian finally let go. Not expecting this, Helen lost her coordination and stumbled, falling to the floor on her knees.

She suddenly crawled closer towards Ciel and for a second she looked at him; recognition and plead the only things he could see in her eyes. Soon however, all the focus was gone and once again she seemed to be unaware of the surroundings.

Ciel didn't know what was it that made her look at her own arms, but as soon as she did this, her eyes widened even more. She immediately began to scratch at her own skin, violently grazing it with her fingernails, drawing blood.

Was she hallucinating? Was she seeing something on her flesh? Was she feeling something, crawling on it or under it?

Frightened noises, suppressed by the cloth kept escaping her lips. Whines, moans, sobs. Blood was now freely running down her arms, crimson drops slowly falling into the pool of red. She was like a wild animal; blindly trying to escape the unknown, uncaring of the consequences.

When she started clawing at her face and neck, writhing on the floor, Ciel couldn't help but wince; the sight in front of him making him feel ill. When some of the blood splattered his shoe, it was too much.

"I want to go home," he said suddenly, turning his gaze to Sebastian.

The demons stared at him for a second, a hint of disappointment visible in his eyes. "My Lord, but this is what you wished for and I have only just begun-"

"Don't make me repeat my words," growled the boy, not letting him complete the sentence. "I'm tired and I want to leave this place now! Then you can come back and finish what you started by yourself," he demanded.

"Your wish is my command, Master."

* * *

After opening the curtains, Sebastian approached Ciel's bed.

"It's time to wake up, my Lord," his voice a bit louder than usual but still within what an awakening person would consider a tolerable range.

"Ngh…" sighed the boy in response, turning on the other side.

He felt too good to get up now… So blissfully warm, so pleasantly numb and peaceful. And the bed was just so irresistibly soft, the covers silky, shielding his body from the outside cold.

"It seems that you have gotten used to getting a few more hours of sleep, Master, even though you were so opposed to that in the beginning," Sebastian spoke again.

"What… are you mumbling there…" murmured semi-coherently Ciel.

He covered his eyes with his palm, the daylight far too bright for his still half-asleep vision. He sighed loudly once again, finally forcing himself to sit up.

He jumped slightly when he felt something being placed on the bed cover, under the place his thighs were occupying. Instinctively opening his eyes, he noticed a newspaper. He threw Sebastian a displeased look, before grabbing the paper, his eyes skimming the text. He quickly found what he was looking for – a bold heading saying _'A noble woman mysteriously falls mentally ill and ends up in the Asylum. See page 7'._

He put the newspaper on the bed, not a hint of satisfaction in his face.

"Are you expecting me to give you a reward for that?" he asked sarcastically. "I know you are a dog but I don't believe that positive reinforcement method of training is the right one," he added dryly.

Sebastian placed a set of clothes on the bed and pulled the covers away from Ciel.

"I don't care much for dogs," the demon said finally, in a neutral tone of the voice.

"Your preference isn't significant," commented Ciel, blankly staring at the opposite wall.

Sebastian didn't reply and began to unbutton his nightshirt, his fingers quickly and skillfully finishing the task.

"There was a letter for you today. From the Queen," he said suddenly. "Do you wish to read it now?"

"Another one?" murmured Ciel, a hint of surprise evident on his face. He sighed softly. "I want to see it now," he decided.

Once the butler dressed him in a blue shirt and tied the bow on his neck, he pulled out a branded letter from his pocket and handed it to Ciel.

Ciel read the letter quickly. This case seemed to even more serious than the last one.

"There has been quite a lot of homicide within families in London lately," he said finally. "Her Majesty is deeply concerned with this. All the cases appear to be unrelated... We will begin the investigation today."

* * *

Ciel and Sebastian just entered the room of the fifth, and so far the last one, crime scene. It was located in a perfectly average common house. According to Scotland Yard, in the bedroom they were currently occupying a thirteen year old boy murdered his parents, and then committed suicide.

Ciel wandered around the room, looking for any sort of hints that could reveal the boy's motives. There was nothing out of ordinary… Except for the large knife and blood, of course. Dried crimson staining the wall, floor, and the large bed.

"There is nothing…" murmured Ciel quietly. "Any hints that could-" he cut off suddenly. "What do you think?" he asked, looking at Sebastian.

"Me?" a hint of fake surprise was evident in the demon's tone. "Are you asking a mere servant for-"

"Don't question my decisions, just say what you think!" snapped Ciel impatiently.

Sebastian chuckled slightly. "Very well, my Lord. I can clearly sense that there was a demonic presence here, not so long ago," he stated emotionlessly.

Ciel's uncovered eye sparkled with interest and curiosity for a second. "A demonic presence?" he repeated. "Could a demon kill them all or…" he broke off again, thinking for a second and biting his lip. It was the boy that killed them first, so… "Do you mean like… a possession?" he said finally.

Sebastian nodded. "Exactly, Master, this is exactly what I believe."

"I see," muttered Ciel, briefly glancing at the demon. "We need to see one of my acquaintances now, maybe we can find out more about this… demonic presence," he decided.

* * *

Ciel, Sebastian, and a man with long white hair were all hovering over an opened coffin. They were inside a room with dimmed lights that held the stench of death; in the Undertaker's workplace.

"So, how do you like him, hmm?" an amused Undertaker's voice ended the gloomy silence.

Ciel winced, choosing not to answer the question and averting his eyes from the boy's mangled corpse. "Was there anything that could be considered important or suspicious with any of the bodies?" he asked.

"Perhaps there was," nodded Undertaker. He turned his attention to the left pocket of his black coat, only to pull out a bone shaped biscuit from it. He sniffed it and took a bite.

"Well, what was it then?" snapped Ciel impatiently, observing him.

"Patience is a virtue, little Earl," mumbled Undertaker but it was a bit difficult to understand him, his mouth still full of the biscuit. "But there you go…" he added, his hand reaching into the pocket. Seconds after, there was a crumbled piece of paper in his opened palm. He offered it to Ciel.

The boy took the note without hesitation, quickly examining it. "Le magasin magique," he read out loud, a skeptical look on his face. "There's also the address."

Undertaker, clearly not following the conversation anymore, offered a bone biscuit to Sebastian, though the demon refused with a polite shake of his head.

"Is that all?" asked Ciel, his gaze still locked on the little piece of paper.

The Undertaker chewed another piece of his biscuit slowly and swallowed it before answering. "No, little Earl, in fact, one of the other pretty corpses I've had over the last few weeks had the same thing, in the back pocket of his pants," he chuckled, his hand fidgeting in the pocket of the dark coat, trying to find more treats.

"This is going to make things easier then," commented Ciel, folding the paper and passing it to Sebastian. "We are leaving now," he announced.

"Next time you will have to pay me, little Earl," warned Undertaker, licking the crumbs from his fingers.

Ciel turned around to glance at him. For a second, a spark of recognition appeared in his gaze. "You… remind me of someone," he mumbled, before he could stop himself.

Undertaker, one of his fingers still in his mouth, just gave a questioning tilt of his head and replied with a short, "Oh?"

Ciel didn't hear it because he already left.

* * *

A large "Le magasin magique" sign wasn't very visible from the distance. The place itself was hidden away in one of the alleys, hard to find from the high-street.

"I'm already tired, let's just take a quick look and then I want to go home," complained Ciel in an annoyed voice.

"Certainly, my Lord," simply replied the demon, opening the door before him.

Ciel entered the shop, immediately looking around, taking in all the surroundings. The inside of the building was quite small but there were a lot of items everywhere, on the tables, shelves, by the shopping window, even hanging from the ceiling. A wide variety of cards, Ouija boards, amulets, pendants, vials filled with colorful liquids, candles, dusty books…

"Can I help you?" a sudden voice startled him a little bit. He turned around, his gaze meeting a pair of bright green eyes.

A young girl stood about a meter away from him. She had a red dress and long dark hair, reaching her waist.

"No, thank you," answered Ciel. "I already found what I needed." Not wanting to look suspicious, he grabbed a dusted book from the nearby shelf.

"I see," the girl gave him a half-smile. "Most people who come here are unhappy," she suddenly added.

Ciel chose not to comment. "Are there a lot of people interested in… these things?" he asked instead.

The girl nodded. "Many, many of my customers are victims of unrequited love… and they try to find solution with this. Others want to become someone important."

Ciel just nodded. "Sorry, I am in a bit of a hurry. Sebastian, pay her for this," he murmured, gesturing to the book.

"Wait," she stopped him. She smiled at Ciel again before handing him a piece of paper, with the name of the shop and the address. "Just so you will not forget about it when you need something again," she added, as if trying to justify her action.

Ciel took the piece of paper and placed it in the pocket of his coat without a word.

As soon as they both left the shop, Ciel looked at Sebastian.

"We will come back here tomorrow night, when she's not there," he murmured. "She doesn't really seem all that suspicious… but something about this shop just seems off to me," he added.

His uncovered eye stared at the pentagram embedded in the book he was holding. He let his finger trace it slowly.

"Whatever you wish, Master."

* * *

Sebastian immediately sensed that something wasn't right. It was already the middle of the night but now he knew it wouldn't be a peaceful one.

He quickly appeared in Ciel's room, right next to his bed. Just as he leaned down over the boy, wanting to check up on him, Ciel's eyes snapped open, revealing widened pupils and unnatural looking irises; royal blue completely tainted by disturbing red, just like blood. A clawed hand suddenly placed on his neck caught him off guard.


	12. Chapter 11

_AU: Thank you very much for all the reviews, favs and follows, they always make me happy and motivate me so much.  
_

_Shattered Apocalypse, thank you for being my fabulous beta-reader!  
_

* * *

Claws latched at Sebastian's neck, and blood splattered on the white bed sheet, a piece of flesh ripping away with it. Pain wasn't identified in the demon's eyes, only a hint of surprise and irritation.

Blue eyes turned crimson, claws instead of fragile fingernails… And that stare. Yes, the stare full of loathing and fury at the same time… he didn't have any doubts, not even for a second, that the _thing _in front of him wasn't Ciel, even if it had his body.

In a matter of seconds, Ciel lashed out again without any restraints or self-preservation. This time, however, Sebastian was prepared, and easily avoided the attack. This angered Ciel even further and a low, inhuman like growl escaped his throat.

"Would you _kindly_ explain why you possess my Master?" murmured Sebastian, not even attempting to make his voice sound less irritated.

A cold, amusement-filled laugh, so unlike Ciel, echoed in the room. Ciel stopped his attacks for a moment, watching Sebastian with slight interest.

"Because he deserves to die," murmured Ciel, his voice more husky than usual.

Sebastian sighed. "Unfortunately, I will not allow-"

Before he could finish the sentence, Ciel spoke again.

"I will kill you," he promised sweetly, a sly smile painted on his face. "And then him."

In one quick movement, he broke into a run. Sebastian's fast reflexes worked quite well, for he immediately grabbed the back of Ciel's shirt, trying to stop him. Unfortunately, he overestimated the strength of the fabric, as the white material simply ripped, letting the boy escape.

"Find me if you can!" yelled Ciel, quickly disappearing from Sebastian's line of sight.

He was fast, he had to give him that. Still, the boy was obviously very, very childish, too, making Sebastian play hide and seek, and he had to yet find out his real powers. But, of course, there was no way he would be a match to Phantomhive's butler… The possessed Ciel clearly miscalculated the demon's abilities.

Sebastian quickly walked through the corridor, straight into the main hall. He secretly hoped that the servants would not wake up, which would certainly save him a lot of trouble.

Thanks to his sharpened senses, he immediately heard a rustle, which would be impossible to hear for a human. A large knife was suddenly thrust in his direction but he simply moved away a little bit, already aware of the fact that it was coming. The knife embedded itself in a wooden shelf standing nearby, instead of his flesh.

Before he even had the chance to react, five knives were thrown at him, each in a slightly different direction, so even if he attempted to dodge it, one would certainly still hit its target. A sharp blade cut deeply into his side, quickly staining the white shirt crimson. With a clearly annoyed expression on his face, almost as if he forced himself not to roll his eyes, Sebastian quickly grabbed the handle of the knife with his gloved palm and pulled it out, letting it fall to the floor. The sound of blood dripping to the floor seemed unnaturally loud in the quiet room.

"Why won't you throw it back at me, hmm?" a curious, amused voice echoed in the room. "Afraid to… hurt me?"

Sebastian gave him a fake, pleasant smile in reply. "Oh, I dream of nothing more than returning it to you… However, under these circumstances, it is impossible, so I shall be a little more patient," he said and looked up, without a doubt able to sense, and possibly even see, the creature there, even though the place was filled with darkness.

A half-second later, the second demon revealed itself, as he jumped from the large shelf onto the floor, facing Sebastian. He tilted his head to the side, observing the butler with interest. His eyes lowered to Sebastian's wounded side.

He unexpectedly stood on the balls of his feet, leaning close to Sebastian, their bodies touching.

"Does it hurt?" he whispered close to his ear, his hand touching the injury, slowly caressing it. "Should I lick it better for you?" he murmured huskily, before lowering his mouth slightly and letting his tongue trace the outside of Sebastian's ear. At the same time, the clawed palm, which was still touching Sebastian's side suddenly buried itself in the wound deeply, making blood splash over the marble floor with an unnaturally loud, unpleasant sound.

Sebastian's eyes narrowed slightly. Before Ciel had a chance to react, he gripped the boy's wrist, forcibly pulling his hand away from the injury.

Ciel winced, struggling to escape the clutch. "Don't be so rough with me," he murmured, his voice laced with pain, obviously exaggerating. "Let go!" he demanded, but surprisingly, panic could be heard in his voice.

Sebastian chuckled. "I am afraid I cannot do that." In one swift movement, he grabbed Ciel's other wrist and pinned the boy to the nearest wall. "Leave. Now," he ordered coldly. "This is your last warning and next time, I will not ask so nicely, I can assure you."

Ciel's crimson eyes turned even darker for a second, and this was the only warning Sebastian got. Next thing he knew, one of Ciel's hands managed to escape his hold. With a low growl, he blindly scratched at his face, leaving five bleeding lines across his cheek.

Sebastian quickly composed himself, angry for letting his guard down.

"Aren't you a wild one?" he muttered quietly, once again pinning the boy to the wall by holding his wrists. "You should have just stay in your own body, instead of trying to taint my Master like that and-"

Shockingly, Sebastian's words had an immediate effect on the boy. He howled loudly, an animal like sound filled with pain and absolute fury, before words began to fall from his mouth.

"I don't have my body anymore, they ruined it, they dirtied it, humiliated it again and again!" he screamed, his voice echoing off the walls. "Then they cut it up to little pieces!"

Sebastian watched with a neutral expression as tears started to streak down the boy's face. It was quite interesting to watch, for even when his Master cried in front of him, he usually tried to hide it, or at least felt ashamed for showing weakness. This creature, however, appeared not to have such restraints.

"And how is this related to you possessing innocent people and killing them?" the butler asked, still not releasing the hold he had on the boy.

Personally, he did not care for the demon's motives, his grief, or his hatred. The only thing he was aiming for was gathering information he could pass to the real Ciel, which would finally explain the case they were working on now.

Ciel's now crimson eyes narrowed, as a grimace appeared on his face, now wet with tears.

"Because it's all his fault," he hissed, his voice sounding dark, completely demonic, and nothing like Ciel.

"His?" Sebastian looked at him with a slight surprise. "Do you mean-"

"The owner of this body," snarled Ciel. "It all because of him!"

"How is it his fault?" asked Sebastian, making his voice sound patient, trying to hide how bored he was with the pitiful being, but determined to find out as much as he could before getting rid of him.

The boy's eyes closed for a second. When he opened them again, he stared straight in Sebastian's own. He finally stopped trying to get away, completing ceasing all his movements and efforts.

"They… they were angry at him, so angry. The exorcists from the Asylum," he whispered now, tears still freely trickling down his face and neck, only to disappear in the material of Ciel's nightshirt. "But those men took him away from this place and they took it out on me! All their anger… They did things to me and hit me and smashed my head against the table and cut both my wrists… And it hurt so much… But I was still alive when they were drowning me!" he raised his voice again.

Not sensing any immediate threat, Sebastian eased his grip on the boy a little bit. It would not be appropriate for him, a butler, to cause Ciel any unnecessary bruises.

Ciel didn't even seem to notice, as he continued talking. He now turned his head to the side, no longer staring at the other demon. "When I died, they cut my body up and threw it away where people throw away their trash!" he hissed with fury. "And all I wanted was just to go with those men like _he_ did but they told me that they have no use for someone like me, like I was nothing! It's all his fault, why was he better?!"

"I see," murmured Sebastian, more to himself than anything else. "This is why you didn't pass on then. Sudden death, refusing to accept it and a lot of hatred…"

Sebastian let his hand touch the boy's chin, forcing him to tilt his head and look at him.

"Let me ask out of curiosity, why the magic shop? Any meaning to that? Or is it just because people going there are an easier target, as believing in magic takes them away from…God?" he asked, a hint of dislike impossible to hide as he said the last word of the sentence.

Ciel just nodded. "I knew he'd come if I killed enough of people, I found out about him. When you're dead and when your mind seems clear… it's easier to find out about people," he murmured after a second.

"This is all I wanted to know," replied Sebastian with a pleasant smile. "Now…"

A panic appeared in Ciel's eyes, as he understood what Sebastian was finally going to do. "Please no," he begged, looking him in the eye. "You and I are so alike, you too are-"

Sebastian chuckled, interrupting him. "Oh, this is a little bit insulting. You are nothing more than a little vengeful spirit; it's not exactly fair to even call you a demon…" he sighed. "It seems that your death didn't cure your insanity, for you don't even seek revenge from the right people. It seems that your ill mind just focused on one little detail, quite insignificant to the whole picture."

"You don't understand!" frantically protested the boy. "Please, if you take care of me and help me I will do any-"

"However, know that the ones you should really direct your revenge at, are already dead," Sebastian continued, as if not hearing him. "Therefore…"

The boy's hand grabbed his arm desperately, his body leaning into the other demon's body, as if seeking protection. "Please, I-"

"Me and my Master…" began quietly Sebastian, his voice now nothing more than a whisper, as if he was trying to lull him to sleep. "Have no use…" He covered the other demon's eyes with his palm gently, making his breath hitch. "For someone like you," he finished, smirking.

Of course, he could spare this pitiful creature's existence, simply forcing him out of Ciel's body and arranging for him to depart from this world for good. But he didn't want to. Destroying him would be much, much more satisfying.

There was a flash of violet, which chased all the darkness in the room away for a mere second, and a pained gasp, before everything went back to normal. Some dark feathers appeared on the floor.

Ciel's form went completely limp, and if not for Sebastian's quick reflexes, he would have slid down the wall. The demon quickly picked up the unconscious body and carried it upstairs, back to the bedroom.

Just as Sebastian lay him down on the bed, the boy, looking even paler than usual, stirred slightly. Soon after, with a soft sigh, Ciel's eyes opened, this time revealing one royal blue in color, and the other purple, with the familiar contract mark embedded in it. He stared at the butler leaning over him slightly, a look of confusion appearing on his face. He noticed that the always perfect, unblemished skin now had five bloody scratches on it. Acting almost instinctively, his hand reached out to touch the wounded place, gently letting his fingers trace it.

"Sebas…tian?" he murmured finally, his voice unsure. "What happened…?"

The demon smirked in response, gently taking the boy's hand away from his face. He then brought Ciel's wrist close to his lips, only to leave a kiss on the bruise, which already developed there, clearly taking advantage of Ciel's dazed state.

"Welcome back, my Lord," said Sebastian finally. "Quite a trip you had, I must imagine," he added.

"A… what?" mumbled semi-coherently Ciel, now glancing at his wrist. He felt a butterfly-like sensation on it a mere second ago, but he couldn't tell what caused it, he just didn't pay attention. It was really difficult for him to concentrate, for some reason. "I don't understand, I can't remember anything…"

Sebastian, finally deciding to clear things up for him, answered. "You were possessed, my Lord. Do you feel like listening to the explanations now, or do you wish to rest first?" he asked, noticing how exhausted Ciel looked.

"Tell me," the boy ordered.

* * *

Finally discarding Her Majesty's worries, Ciel's schedule wan't as busy anymore and two weeks after resolving the case, he asked Sebastian to take him to the graveyard.

The graves of his parents, Madam Red, and the Midfords were close to each other, since they were all related. He placed the last flower bouquet on his parents' grave. He picked different colored roses for each grave: red ones for Madam Red, pink ones for Elizabeth, and white for his parents.

When he stared at the words engraved in marble, stating his parents' names and dates of birth, he felt strangely numb. This was the first time he visited the place, but it didn't bring any emotions out of him. His only aim was to pay his respects. Strangely… some part of him secretly believed that he would find some clues there. Some hints, which would at least help point him in the right direction, so he wouldn't be completely clueless like he was now… Just like a child wandering in the darkness.

As the purely white snowflakes lazily started falling down from the sky, Sebastian, who was standing next to him, pulled the hood of Ciel's black coat over the boy's head. The boy didn't even notice this action, too absorbed by his own thoughts.

Killed. They were all killed. His whole family, and he was the only one left. It wasn't right, none of it was. It wasn't right that their murderers were now walking somewhere, free of any consequences, and it wasn't right that they had taken away his happiness.

His uncovered eye narrowed with anger. It seemed that this visit refreshed his rage, after all. Just as if someone rubbed salt into his wounds, reopening and making them bleed and hurt once again.

"I will never forget or forgive people who put me and my family through all this," he hissed suddenly, speaking out his thoughts without realizing it. "I will never forgive them for the rest of eternity," he added, his voice now no more than a whisper, but it sounded so much more powerful than any scream ever would.

Ciel's words, filled with so much hatred and an unspoken promise of revenge, put a hint of satisfaction on Sebastian's face.

"I wouldn't expect any less from you, Master," he murmured in response, staring at the boy with evident hunger in his eyes.

"You will never get my soul until the corpse of every last one of them is left to rot," said Ciel, not looking at him. "I hope you understand this," he added.

"Of course, my-"

Ciel turned around, not waiting for his response, and interrupting him. "Let's go back now. Heel."

* * *

Ciel's mood seemed significantly lowered since the cemetery visit. Even the three, not-so-new anymore servants had noticed it and tried to cheer him up, in their own ways. Unfortunately, all their attempts failed. Ciel almost broke his tooth on the inedible, hard biscuit Bard served him, and Mey-Rin broke an ancient vase his parents received as a gift once. It happened when she was trying to fit dozens of flowers in it, brought by Finny.

The curtains were drawn but there was a soft glow coming from the candles, lightening the room. Ciel was sitting on a chair next to the dressing table, wearing a white nightshirt. He had just finished his bath, and Sebastian was brushing his hair. Ciel liked it, the feeling was comforting, and for some reason made him feel a bit sleepy; the even, soft touches of the brush. Not even once the butler pulled his hair, smoothing out all the knots and tangles without any effort. After years of abuse and neglect in the Asylum, he enjoyed the attention and the feeling of being taken care of very much.

"How did this happen anyway?" asked suddenly Ciel. "Why did he become a demon? I didn't know something like that was possible."

Weeks had passed since the possession incident, but even though Sebastian only told him the basic outline of what happened, he never questioned it until now.

Continuing his task, Sebastian answered. "His mind and soul were very confused. At first, he didn't even understand that he was killed because, to him, his death was very sudden and unexpected. He refused to accept this fact. However, I believe that it's highly possible that someone helped him become what he was," explained the demon. "What's more… is that after someone's death, some beings are in charge of taking care of their soul," he added, referring to the soul reapers. "But, not all of them perform their duties correctly."

"Mhm. I see," murmured Ciel quietly, clearly satisfied with that answer. "I didn't know…"

Sebastian didn't reply to that and put the hairbrush back on the dressing table. Ciel sighed in response, unhappy about the fact that the pleasant sensation was over, but refusing to admit to that.

"Master, are you sleepy?" asked the demon, observing him. "It's quite late."

"I guess…" Ciel shrugged.

Without another word, he stood up and walked towards the bed. He sat on the soft mattress, and subconsciously glanced at the doorway, as if expecting someone to be there. This didn't go unnoticed by Sebastian.

"You seem troubled today, my Lord," said the demon, pulling away the covers for Ciel, so he could be tucked in.

"You are imagining things," Ciel lied, avoiding his eyes.

The visit to the graveyard had affected him in a negative way. Somehow, ever since returning from this place, he couldn't stop thinking about his relatives and their killers. His mind kept presenting him with gruesome images of their deaths. It was making him frustrated beyond belief, because he desperately wanted to do _something_, find them, tear them to pieces, kill them, but he had no idea where to start looking.

"Very well. Then now I shall-" began the demon.

"No," Ciel interrupted suddenly. "Stay until I fall asleep, this is an order," he demanded in a harsh tone of the voice.

* * *

Ciel's eyes snapped open, his breathing erratic. He had another nightmare. He tried to calm down, but his body still shook all over. He couldn't wipe away all the things he'd just experienced from his memory, even for a second; they were still too fresh. Without thinking, he pulled the covers away from him.

Ciel quickly found his way into the bathroom. The nightmare made him nauseous, he felt like vomiting. He leaned over the sink, his palms gripping the porcelain base firmly. Turning the tap on, he splashed the ice-cold water on his face, hoping it would make him at least a little bit better and refreshed.

Sighing softly, he backed away from the sink a little bit and turned his gaze onto the large wall mirror. There was a look of pure fear on his face, as he stared at his own reflection.

The image in front of him looked so strangely familiar, yet foreign, and most of all - disturbing. Instead of a white nightshirt Sebastian put on him not so long ago, he was wearing a dirty, ruined blue outfit with a torn apron, stained crimson. The black and white striped stockings were dirty and ripped in many places. The worst part, however, was his right eye. It was very injured, just as it was right after he'd been stabbed with a glass shard. The contract mark was no longer visible because of the blood trickling from it down his face; just as tears would, were they colored red. That wasn't all though. Bruises were covering his body; his arms, his face, his neck. His skin was a sickish pale shade, marred with many small cuts and scratches. And most frighteningly, a large blade was in his hand, the exact replica of what he'd found in one of the visions, when he pulled it out of the pond, just like The Cat instructed him to.

He was hyperventilating, unable to look away. He didn't understand, he was terrified and confused. To his horror, his mirror reflection suddenly cocked his head to the side a little bit, staring at him with interest, even though he was certain that _he_ didn't do it.

"It was my fault."

Ciel shivered upon hearing his own voice speaking, even though he didn't intend to say anything. It sounded empty and cold. Before he had any chance to react, he saw his mirror reflection bring the knife close to the left wrist and slash it in one hasty movement.

A loud gasp of pain echoed in the bathroom and tears immediately appeared in Ciel's eyes. The sound of liquid dripping onto the marble floor seemed strangely unrealistic. Ciel looked down at his own wrist. There was a large gash across it, bleeding continuously. So much blood, in such short time. He didn't even know if the screams belonged to him, even though he could hear his own voice.

Suddenly everything went quiet and he saw Sebastian, right next to him. At first, he wasn't sure if what was happening was real. He was sitting on a chair and the demon was speaking to him, asking him about something, though it took Ciel a long moment to comprehend his words. There was a soft, blue towel pressed into his wrist and Sebastian was holding it in place.

Sebastian was staring at him, disbelief evident on his face, as well as some concern. If he had not gotten there so quickly, his prey; the wide-eyed bleeding doll, might have died, if it only chose a different place to injure itself, for example its fragile little neck. This wasn't acceptable, for he certainly wasn't done with it yet. Still, he knew that what his meal did wasn't entirely deliberate. He could sense its feelings. The state of its mind was disastrous right now.

"I… I d-don't know what's wrong with me," Ciel whispered. "Why do I… Look like that, the clothes, the injuries, how… And my eye…"

He was in shock, and thanks to that, he could no longer even feel the anxiety. Just the strange sense of emptiness. Everything seemed unreal, almost as if he was dreaming it all up.

"Master, it's alright, there is nothing wrong with the way you look," Sebastian assured the boy, trying to calm him down.

"Nnh, no…" argued weakly Ciel, wincing in pain. "I look like… in those visions, I saw it. And my reflection… I, he said that it was all his fault," he was mumbling, barely coherently. "I must have done something… What have I done…? I can't remember…"

"Master, please calm down. Everything is okay." A hand was now soothingly stroking the bluish grey hair, in slow, calming movements. "Were you hallucinating again?" the demon asked, his tone very gentle and quiet, as if he was trying to comfort the boy.

"No… No, I wasn't," murmured Ciel, seeming as if he wasn't completely aware of what was going on around him anymore. "It was real, I saw it in a mirror, I woke up because of the nightmare…"

Sebastian didn't comment. It seemed like Ciel's hallucinations were a bit different this time because now they were mixed up with reality. Previously, when Ciel was hallucinating, he was completely unresponsive, almost unconscious, but apparently now things were different. Not only was he experiencing sudden hallucinations when awake, in the middle of doing something, but he also didn't have any control over what he was doing. It was much more serious now.

Suddenly, as if wanting to find proof, Ciel looked in the mirror. He could only see his own and Sebastian's reflection now. And he was… himself again. There were no bloody, torn clothes, injured and bruises… There was, however, a blood drenched towel, which was still being pressed to his wrist by his butler.

"Master?" gently probed the demon, trying to get his attention without any success. "I will stich your wound now, please try to sit still," he said, his tone still caring and comforting. He also talked slowly, as if he was speaking to a young child.

Ciel ignored him completely, still seemingly in his own world. Sebastian quickly began to disinfect the wound. As soon as he was done with cleaning the injury, he started to sew the wound together, with a sanitized needle and thread previously soaked in alcohol. This situation reminded Sebastian of when he was tending Ciel's injuries for the first time. He remembered there were many gasps and hisses of pain back then so he was now surprised not to see any signs of pain on Ciel's face.

"It's gone… How is this… It was my Other Self, and he slashed his wrist with a knife and-" the boy began to talk again, in a confused, quiet voice.

His eyes immediately fell on the bloody knife placed on the floor. It was so _different_. It was a regular, kitchen knife, not the one he saw in his visions, _it just wasn't the same_, his reflection had a different knife in his hand.

"It's not the same one… He had a different one," he kept mumbling. "Sebastian, what is this knife doing here… I didn't…"

"Master, I know it doesn't seem like it to you, but you are the one who slashed your wrist with this knife, during your hallucination. You just didn't know what you were doing," explained the demon, even though he knew the boy wouldn't understand what happened.

As predicted, Ciel silently shook his head, disagreeing with him.

A sudden loud voice made the boy look towards the doorway, where he noticed the rest of the servants, standing and observing the scene.

"I'm so s-sorry! I'm really sorry!" a terrified and upset Mey-Rin exclaimed. "Today I was helping Finny cut some flowers and forgot to put away the knife, I still had it in my pocket. Then I was cleaning up Young Master's bathroom and must have dropped it somehow!" Tears were now shimmering in her eyes. "I h-had no idea Young Master would get hurt!" sobbing, she quickly turned away, and disappeared from the doorway.

Ciel didn't even seem to hear her words. Finny and Bard looked like they completely had no idea what to do. Especially Finny, looking at the bloody floor; he was quite pale. Sebastian helped to put them out of their mystery.

"I have this situation under control," the demon said simply. "You two are dismissed."

"I-I hope you feel better soon, Young Master," said Finnian silently, his head down.

Bard nodded, as if trying to say he was agreeing with the boy, and they both left.

Sebastian skillfully tied a knot at the end of the thread to keep the stitching together and cut the remainder of the thread with small scissors. He then gently cleaned away some remaining blood from the boy's wrist and began dressing the wound.

"Sebastian, I think it was… my Other Self. The one The Cat told me about," whispered Ciel, staring at the nearby wall. "This place… turned into hell now… And now it turned into reality… how is this possible?" he asked, not aware that his words weren't making much sense.

"We will talk about it tomorrow, Master. It's still the middle of the night, you need to rest," said Sebastian, in a patient voice. He carefully bandaged Ciel's wrist.

"I don't feel right. I don't know what happened…"

Ciel didn't protest when Sebastian effortlessly picked him up. To his surprise, the boy nuzzled his face into his neck, suddenly seeming much calmer.

"You will not leave my side tonight," murmured Ciel.


	13. Chapter 12

_AU: Thank you so much for all the reviews, favs and follows, I really appreciate them.  
_

_Shattered Apocalypse, thank you for beta-reading, you're a doll :)  
_

* * *

"No… No, wait, the rabbit, where….?" Ciel's distressed voice could be heard in the bedroom. He didn't finish the sentence, breaking off when Sebastian handed him the plush toy in a matter of seconds.

Next, the demon carefully lay Ciel on the soft bed, without any further protests coming from the boy, who appeared to be much more relaxed now, though also very tired. He pulled up the covers, sheltering his form from the cold.

"Master, is there anything else you-"

Ciel sighed, interrupting him. He was staring at the butler intensely, his eyelids half open. He was hugging the rabbit doll to his chest with his uninjured hand.

"Down," he murmured, gesturing on the bed, as if ordering a dog. His tone was weak but commanding at the same time.

Without a word, Sebastian complied, and lay down on the bed, next to him. Ciel moved a little bit closer so that their bodies were almost touching.

"Sebastian…" he began slowly, as if contemplating whether he should continue or not. "Have I gone insane?" he muttered finally. "Am I like all those people in the Asylum?"

The demon slowly shook his head. "No, Master. You aren't," he answered, his tone firm. "Although you do have some… problems, they aren't nearly as serious as the ones most Asylum patients have."

Ciel just nodded, appearing reassured. He was very tired, his breathing finally slow and even. After a short while, he began to talk again.

"Sebastian, why does my hand hurt…?" he mumbled, now barely coherently, his voice laced with sleep. He then moved his hand, sneaking it away from under the cover and blindly aiming to put it somewhere in Sebastian's line of gaze. Surprisingly he succeed, his skillfully bandaged wrist now right in front of the demon's face.

"It's because you injured it, Master," replied patiently Sebastian. He gently grabbed Ciel's hand, not wanting to cause him more unnecessary pain, and then placed it down, so it was resting on the soft bed sheet.

Ciel sighed softly. "I can't remember," he murmured, his response barely audible.

"It's because you are very tired, my Lord," assured the demon, even though he looked like he didn't entirely believe in his own words. "You had a very stressful day and it seemed like the visit to the graveyard upset you greatly. You need a lot of rest now," he added, explaining.

"Fine," agreed quietly Ciel, seeming perfectly content, not upset in the slightest now.

The boy turned on his side, away from Sebastian, now facing the wall. He didn't stay silent for long, though, and finally spoke his mind, as if trying to reverse his action.

"Do not leave until I fall asleep," he murmured, repeating his order in a soft voice and finally letting his eyelids close completely. "And comfort me."

Unknowingly to Ciel, the demon smirked; every display of Ciel's vulnerability – his triumph, a little victory and another invisible string attached to the porcelain doll. And how amusing this situation was to him… Firstly, his meal turning away from him, only to beg for his attention seconds later, showing how weak without him it really was.

Obeying the order, Sebastian moved closer to Ciel, his arm wrapping around the fragile body gently, holding him close to his own body. For a second, Ciel tensed, going completely still, almost stopping his breathing, but he quickly allowed himself to relax again.

"Is this better, Master?" murmured the demon into his ear.

Ciel's only response was a fake, irritated sigh. He wasn't facing Sebastian, so fortunately, the demon didn't see the hint of a smile on his pale face.

The demon wasn't facing Ciel, so fortunately, the living porcelain doll didn't see the dangerous violet flash in his crimson eyes.

* * *

He was awoken by some loud, unidentified noises. His eyes opened slowly and he instinctively rubbed them. It was then when he noticed the bandage neatly wrapped around his wrist. The memories of the previous night quickly came back to him, but he didn't feel that upset about them anymore, more so strangely anaesthetized, as if his feelings had been switched off.

He felt the mattress shift. Looking at his left, he noticed Sebastian getting up. The demon stared at him, and he averted his gaze. Today, he was ashamed of his last night's weakness.

"Good morning, Master," his butler broke the silence, in his usual tone of the voice. "I was just about to go and check the source of the noises and-"

Sebastian never got to finish the sentence, as the door suddenly burst open. In a matter of seconds, his three servants entered the room. Finnian and Bard were dragging May-Rin with them, refusing to let go as she struggled, a big suitcase in her hands.

Sebastian narrowed his eyes, quickly approaching them. "What is the meaning of this?" he asked, tone calm, yet carrying a hint of threat.

Ciel watched the whole situation with slight confusion evident on his face.

"May-Rin thinks she needs to leave, Mister Sebastian!" exclaimed Finnian, in a panicked and far-too-loud for Ciel's liking voice.

"Yeah, we were tryin' to stop her," agreed grumbled uneasily Bard.

The maid struggled, still trying to escape their clutches, all her attempts in vain. "I almost killed Young Master!" she shrieked. "There's no way for me to stay!"

Sebastian stared at her for a second, making a light blush appear on her cheeks. "I believe this is not for you to decide," he said simply. "I am certain that if Master wished for you to leave, he would tell you so himself," he stated firmly. "Isn't that right, my Lord?" He turned around, glancing at Ciel, who was still in bed.

Ciel nodded, looking at the maid. "This is true. I want you to continue working here," he agreed. "I don't blame you for what happened," he added, staring at his bandaged wrist instinctively.

Upon hearing these words, tears shimmered in the red haired girl's eyes. "Y-Young Master is so forgiving, I don't know how to thank…!"

"I suggest you go unpack. And the two of you can help her," said firmly Sebastian, in a commanding tone.

All the servants answered immediately, their voiced mixing together.

"Y-yes, of course!"

"No problem."

"We're going to help! Sorry for disturbing you, Young Master!"

The door was then slammed shut. Sebastian took a deep breath, a palm now covering his eyes. He composed himself within ten seconds, and turned around to face Ciel, a pleasant and unbothered expression once again on his face.

"Are you feeling better today, Master?" he asked, approaching the bed.

The boy shrugged. "Mhm. I feel normal, I guess," he murmured.

Sebastian nodded, crimson eyes never leaving Ciel. "Master, you realize that something needs to be done, so such incident will not happen in the-"

"It won't," harshly interrupted him Ciel. "Everything is fine," he murmured as if trying to convince himself. "It was just… just a little accident," he added, his voice nothing more than a whisper now.

Even after getting a decent amount of sleep, he still looked exhausted; his skin unhealthily pale, his eyes obscured by dark shadows, emphasizing his tiredness.

"You know this isn't true, my Lord. It happened before, and so it will probably happen again. Therefore we should aim to seek some solution," disagreed the demon, his tone of voice, however, gentle, not forceful or commanding.

Grimacing, Ciel pulled away the covers and stood up, clearly angry. He then aggressively grabbed the collar of Sebastian's white shirt, forcing the demon to slightly bow before him.

"I can't remember asking for you opinion," he hissed with fury, not letting go of the material. "How many times do I have to tell you to stop questioning my choices? How dare you defy your Master like that?"

Sebastian's face was as expressionless as ever, as he stared at Ciel. "I was only looking out for your well being and-"

"I don't care. Leave!" Ciel snapped, finally letting go of the shirt's collar. "I can't stand the sight of you right now. And I don't want any breakfast either, so don't bother and just leave my bedroom," he demanded, his voice still furious.

Sebastian calmly fixed his shirt, so it looked perfect again, before speaking. "As you wish, Master," he answered simply. "Do you want me to send in one of the other servants to bring you food and help you dress?" he asked.

Ciel turned away, now facing the window and staring at the gardens behind it. "No. I want to be alone," he murmured, his voice now calmer.

As Sebastian was getting closer to the door, Ciel hear him murmuring.

"Oh dear, Master has been acting in a very, very bipolar manner lately…"

"Bastard!" Ciel gasped with disbelief. It was so obvious that his butler said it on purpose and knew that Ciel was going to hear his words. He grabbed the first thing he noticed, a glass figure, and threw it at Sebastian's back.

As expected, the demon, without even having to turn away, reached out with his left hand and blindly managed to catch the thing before it hit the target. He then effortlessly tossed it back in Ciel's direction so perfectly that it landed back in the place: in the corner of the nightstand, no damage done.

This angered Ciel even more. Sneering, he grabbed the object once again, and threw it at the demon, this time using even more force. At the same time, Sebastian opened the door and gracefully walked out, closing it suddenly. The glass figure collided with the hard wooden surface and smashed to pieces.

Ciel sat back at the edge of the bed, all anger leaving him, along with his energy. As much as he hated to admit that, he knew that his acting really _was_ bipolar, just as Sebastian said. His mood shifts were very frequent and extreme lately. Not to mention those visions… He didn't understand what was happening to him, but it was terrifying. This was the reason for his denial; he was simply afraid of what was going on. He was afraid that he was…

_Going mad._

That thought kept tormenting him mercilessly. Was he out of his mind? Had they driven him insane in the Asylum and now, the illness has revealed itself? No, he couldn't think about it. Maybe if he just tried to get busy with work… Yes, it was a good idea; some new projects for Funtom Co. would be good. And maybe what Sebastian said earlier was also true; maybe it was all because of stress. He just had to avoid piling everything on his shoulders, and all would go back to normal.

Not even bothering to get dressed, he left the bedroom and headed straight for his office.

* * *

After three hours of writing reports and drawing some new projects, Ciel fell asleep, his head buried in his arms, resting on the wooden desk. His nap lasted about an hour when he finally woke up, his body not too keen on sleeping in such an uncomfortable position for any longer.

His blurred vision cleared up after a few seconds, as he lifted his head up. The first thing he noticed was a pair of green eyes, staring at him intensely. He heard someone's startled squeal, and the person hovering over him suddenly backed away slightly.

Ciel blinked and looked at the boy with messy strawberry-blond hair in front of him.

"H-hello, Young Master!" Finnian spoke finally, a shy smile on his face. "I didn't want to wake you up because Mister Sebastian says that you need a lot of rest, so I thought I would wait until you woke up," the boy explained enthusiastically.

Ciel looked at him, with slight confusion. "That wasn't necessary, you should've just woken me up…" he murmured, resisting the urge to sigh.

"Oh, no, Young Master, we all want you to get better and I'm sure that Mister Sebastian knows best!" replied Finnian, offering Ciel another reassuring smile. "Oh, I almost forgot!" he exclaimed, suddenly looking for something in one of his pockets. "There was a letter for Young Master, that's why I came," he added, handing Ciel the letter.

Ciel immediately recognized it. It was a letter from the Queen. He took it, slight interest evident in his face now.

"Thank you," he murmured.

"Umm… Young Master…" Finnian began, his voice a bit hesitant, his emerald eyes staring at Ciel's bandaged wrist. "Does your hand still hurt?" he blurted out finally, holding his breath for a few seconds.

"No… It's fine now," murmured Ciel, but this statement wasn't entirely true. He didn't like being reminded of the incident again.

Finnian, however, seemed to believe him, as his face brightened in relief. "Thank God, I'm so glad!" he said happily. "Well then, I will leave Young Master now so he can read the letter in peace." He bowed slightly, before exiting the room.

Ciel ripped open the envelope and read the letter. It concerned another mysterious case he had the duty to resolve. Young people were disappearing during the nighttime after leaving their homes, reasons for their departures unknown to anyone. Over the last three weeks, there had been seventeen missing people; different genders and backgrounds, yet similar ages, the only thing they had in common.

Seemed like he was going to be busy again.

"Sebastian, come here," he ordered.

Easing Her Majesty's worries was his top priority now.

* * *

On that same day, Ciel and Sebastian were investigating all the areas, which were in close proximity to the victims' houses. They couldn't find any witnesses, nor any hints on what might have actually happened to the missing people. The only information they actually managed to get was related to time; some relatives noticed that the victims must have disappeared in the middle of the night. One of them even gave the exact time, which was three a.m.

Now they stood in front of the newest victim's house, snow beneath their feet. Buttoning up Ciel's undone coat, Sebastian stared at the boy's face, before speaking.

"Does my Master wishes to hear my opinion on this case?" he asked in a neutral tone, as his glowed hand brushed Ciel's neck while fixing the collar button.

Ciel ostentatiously looked away, an arrogant look in his eyes. For a second, it seemed like he was contemplating Sebastian's offer, but his sense of pride quickly took over.

"I don't need an opinion from a low servant," he answered coldly.

The demon smirked slightly, but Ciel couldn't see it, for he was staring the opposite way.

"Of course not. I apologize for daring to offer my unworthy service, Master," Sebastian replied with a slight bow.

Ignoring this remark, Ciel made his own decision. "We will come back here tonight, at three am. This is the only cue we have," he murmured.

"As you wish… my Lord."

* * *

Ciel was waiting for Sebastian to serve him dinner, his impatience manifesting itself in the way he was tapping his fingers on the table. He didn't know what the demon was playing at now because he was _never_ late.

When he was ready to get up and leave, the demon suddenly entered. Approaching the table, he put a porcelain plate on its surface, in front of Ciel. Ciel's eyes widened slightly as he looked at the contents of it. It was a piece of paper.

Too angry to even speak, he furiously grabbed the sheet, almost ripping it to pieces immediately. Getting a closer look on it, he finally saw that it was, in fact, a map of a large area of London. There were many spots on it, drew with a pen. What was most interesting, however, was the fact that they were all, except a few of them, perfectly joined; lines almost creating a pentagram shape. There were only about three spots missing, preventing a flawless picture from being created.

"What is this…" he murmured before he could stop himself.

Sebastian offered him a pleasant smile before answering. "This is your appetizer, Master. Is it to your liking?" he asked in a polite tone.

"Be serious, for once," snapped Ciel impatiently. Suddenly, his expression changed slightly, as he looked at the map closer. He blinked, quickly checking the names of the streets and quickly finding out that they matched with the names of the streets he visited with Sebastian today. "Oh," he commented, not very eloquently.

He was quite surprised that the demon actually did this, on his own initiative, for he refused to listen to his advice earlier. Still, the other part of him was slightly angry because this was like going against his order.

"As you probably noticed, Master, the symbol isn't completed," Sebastian spoke, before Ciel could. "However, it's quite easy to notice where exactly the next spot will be. This makes things much easier, as we know the exact location, and the possible approximate time of the next disappearance," the demon added, observing Ciel.

Ciel's gaze scrutinized the demon for a second. He was torn between appreciation for the demon's discovery and irritation for the non-direct disobedience of his order. His frustration, however, won.

"I guess you want your reward now?" he asked in a faked pleasant tone. Not waiting for reply, he spoke again. "Come here Sebastian."

Sebastian's head slightly cocked to the side with curiosity, as if he was trying to predict Ciel's next movement. He listened to the command, though, and came closer, standing beside Ciel's chair.

"Kneel," murmured Ciel, staring at him intensely.

Sebastian did kneel, just like he was ordered to, his face completely void of emotions. Ciel smiled then, leaning down slightly. He reached out with his uninjured hand and touched Sebastian's hair gently, stroking it and petting. They were very soft, and in his mind, Ciel compared them to silky black raven's feathers.

"You are such a good dog, Sebastian," Ciel whispered quietly, his voice filled with praise. "So devoted, so loyal… Master is very pleased with you."

There wasn't any reaction from the demon. Ciel expected to see him angry and humiliated but instead, Sebastian looked as expressionless and uncaring as ever. Ciel finally pulled his hand away.

"Bring me my dinner," he ordered coldly, not turning his gaze away from the demon.

Sebastian stood up. "Right away, Master," he answered in a pleasant tone.

He took a now empty plate, intending to take it back to the kitchen. As soon as he touched it, a crack immediately appeared on the previously flawless porcelain.

* * *

Ten to three, in the middle of the night, Ciel and Sebastian were already on Holywell Street. Ciel was shivering despite wearing his warmest black coat with a furry hood and long black boots. The only source of light was coming from a streetlamp, which was quite far away, so Ciel couldn't see much.

"S-say something or I'm going to die of boredom," said finally Ciel, his teeth chattering.

"This street is also knows as Booksellers' Row," recited Sebastian, his voice sounding academic, as if he was now playing a teacher. "By the time that Queen Victoria came to the throne there were already over fifty pornographic shops here," he added matter of factly.

"E-excuse me?!" Ciel gasped, looking at him with shock. "I didn't need to know… _that_." He grimaced, shaking his head.

Sebastian chuckled. It was quite obvious that he enjoyed Ciel's embarrassment. "I merely followed your order, Master," he replied simply. "It was just an… interesting information about our current location."

"Just shut up," growled quietly Ciel, with a scowl on his face.

Another few minutes passed in silence and peace. Then, the silence was broken. Sebastian and Ciel heard it at the same time. A melody, louder and louder, as if it was getting closer to them. A violin, without a doubt. It was slow and haunting, like a lullaby… Yet, the pace was slowly changing, the gentleness unhurriedly washing away, hinting at darker things to come.

"Devil's Trill Sonata," murmured Ciel, immediately recognizing the piece.

"Indeed," agreed Sebastian. His sharpened senses noticed something Ciel's senses missed. He gently touched Ciel's arm, getting his attention and making the boy look to the left. "Look, Master."

Ciel complied, staring at the house, which was about ten meters away from them. A girl, around fifteen years of age, walked out of the house, closing the door behind her. She was dressed in a pale pink nightgown only, and was barefoot. She looked almost as if she was sleepwalking, for even though her eyes were open, they were glazed and unfocused, like in trance.

"It's the music affecting her," commented Sebastian, watching her.

Ciel nodded. He was certain of it, but he wasn't sure why wasn't he also affected. He also didn't know why people inside the houses, sleeping, weren't woken up by it. They both followed the girl, as the music started to get quicker and more chaotic. They didn't have walk for a long time, before finding the source of the music.

There was a sudden, unnaturally loud sound of footsteps, snow crunching under someone's feet, which could be heard even though the music kept playing… And then, they saw a tall person, dressed in a dark crimson robe. A navy blue violin was resting on his collarbone, supported by his left hand. He was still playing, an unconcerned expression on his face, even though he was staring at the two unexpected newcomers. He had long dark brown hair and very pale skin. Beautiful. Inhuman. His eyes were as red as Sebastian's.

"A demon?" questioned silently Ciel, looking at Sebastian for a brief second.

"Yes, Master," answered his butler simply.

Before he even had a chance to stop Ciel, the boy moved, getting ahead of him. "What have you done to all those people?" he asked in a loud and demanding voice.

Sebastian immediately stood right in front of Ciel, in a protective manner.

The unknown demon ignored Ciel and continued to play the violin for another few seconds. When the girl was finally right next to him, he stopped. A hint of a smile appeared on his lips, as he reached his hand and caressed the girl's long black hair.

"Welcome, my beautiful," he said quietly. He then took her small palm and brought it to his lips, kissing it.

There wasn't any response from the girl. She just stood there, motionless, silent, staring right ahead but seeming to be oblivious to the surroundings.

Finally, the demon looked up and stared at Ciel and Sebastian, his expression unchanged.

"Aren't you two an interesting pair..." he said in a pleasant voice, a spark of curiosity in it. "I marked this as my territory, as you are probably already aware. May I be of any help to you?" he asked, never taking his eyes from them.

Ciel's eyes narrowed with anger when his earlier question went completely ignored. "Don't make me laugh. All the land belongs to Her Majesty and your little pentagram won't change that," he snickered humorlessly. "Did you kill all those people you kidnapped? What happened to them?" he asked again, unable to hide his lack of patience.

The demon glanced at the girl by his side before answering. "Are you talking about my beautiful dolls?" he asked calmly, clearly not affected in the slightest by Ciel's anger.

"I will not allow you to continue this," Ciel said simply, deciding that arguing and trying to make a normal conversation with this being was pointless. He then looked at Sebastian. "This is an order. Defeat him," he commanded harshly. "But don't kill him yet, make him talk first. I need to know what happened to those people."

Sebastian bowed slightly, before replying. "Yes, my Lord." Without any hesitation, he began to approach the violinist.

The other demon slowly put the violin on the snow-covered ground, carefully, as if not wanting any damage to be done to it. He then walked towards Sebastian, but kept looking at Ciel. "This isn't a very wise decision," he said simply, his voice melodic, and lacking any negative feelings.

There was an eerie metallic sound and five knives appeared in Sebastian's right hand; he was holding them in such a way that they looked like steel claws. He attacked first, without any restraint, but the other demon easily dodged the attack, knife-like claws cutting air instead of his skin.

Ciel watched the next silver flashes, illuminated by the moonlight, as knives tore through air again and again, in the places were the second demon was standing just seconds before.

The violinist backed away in the last second, when he was suddenly charged at again, his opponent's moves even faster than they were before. He managed to evade the blades, though barely, as a piece of crimson fabric from his robe tore free, getting lost in the snow blanket.

Ciel stared at the scene in front of him with surprise. He'd never seen anyone managing to hold Sebastian off for so long. The second being was simply avoiding all the attacks, without much effort, not even once attempting to strike back. This being, whoever it was, was doing really well, and it was making Ciel feel slightly anxious.

Ciel's expression changed slightly, as he noticed Sebastian's eyes darkening, the red slowly turning into violet. Some dark feathers fell onto the pure snow, tainting it with their presence. Knives he'd been holding fell to the floor, as human-looking fingernails were replaced by longer and much, much more sharp black real claws. His normal teeth turned into animalistic, canine-like fangs. A dark aura seemed to surround him and Ciel was unable to look away, even if he'd want to. Something about this just seemed to captivate him, draw him in.

Suddenly, the other demon winced slightly, pain evident on his face, even though he tried to hide it. Sebastian's claws were now embedded deep in his side. A low half-growl, half-murmur escaped Sebastian's throat, and a satisfied smirk appeared on his face, before he violently pulled his hand away, ripping a large chunk of flesh out of the second demon's body. Blood gushed out, staining the ground quickly.

Ciel let out a breath he hadn't realize he'd been holding. He watched with relief as Sebastian lashed out again, this time scratching the violinist's neck, smoothly breaking the skin.

What happened next seemed very unreal to Ciel. Unexpectedly, the other demon drew a knife. He didn't even attempt to attack Sebastian with it. He threw it straight at Ciel. Sebastian's sharp senses and reflex allowed him to react immediately. In a matter of half-second, he managed to knock Ciel to the ground, leaning down over him, effectively protecting him from the sharp blade, which embedded itself in his own back instead.

Ciel, slightly trembling, trying to comprehend what just happened during the last few seconds, stared at Sebastian. The demon's arms were placed at both his sides, Sebastian's body not putting any pressure onto his own, even though he was practically right over him.

The demon stared back at him, an undisturbed expression on his face. "I apologize, Master, this was the most efficient way," he said gently, his voice slightly amused.

The snow was cold but Ciel could barely feel it, even though he was laying flat on his back. He stared at Sebastian's face; so familiar, yet different, the violet eyes, the sharp canine, almost vampire-like fangs. He didn't find it scary, as he probably should, but captivating.

The knife wasn't much of a danger to Sebastian and he was going to pull it out in a second, and perhaps to kindly return it to the sender. He was just standing up, almost on his feet already, when he felt something pierce right through his chest. A pained look appeared on his face, crimson eyes closing for a second.

Ciel gasped in shock and fright, as some blood splattered on his face. He instinctively got to his knees and grabbed Sebastian before he'd fall on top of him again, barely managing to hold up the demon's weight.

"S-Sebastian," he whispered, his voice sounding as if he was about to cry.

His uncovered eye widened, as he noticed a part of the large, wide dagger, protruding from Sebastian's chest. His butler's previously white shirt was dyed red, the stain spreading fast.

It was so obvious now. The other demon distracted Sebastian by targeting Ciel, and then used the seconds of Sebastian's distraction to effectively attack him.

Sebastian, biting his lip with a sharp canine tooth, which made a small trail of blood run down his chin, blindly reached out with his hand to his back. He then withdrew from his flesh the first smaller knife, which was aimed at Ciel. It fell to the ground, the noise muffled completely by the snow. With a sickening sound, he then slowly pulled out the other, much bigger dagger. Much more blood poured out of the deep wound, now running freely onto the steady snow and some of it on Ciel.

"Oh my…" murmured quietly Sebastian, his voice sounding different than usual; somehow weak. "So messy. I'm really sorry, Master, it would appear that I have ruined your clothing." He looked at Ciel's dark coat, now discolored with his blood.

"Didn't I warn you? I am stronger than you, more so on my own territory." A familiar voice could be heard from the distance.

In response, Sebastian let out an inhuman, animalistic low growl. Ciel was unable to react in any way, tears now shimmering in his uncovered eye. He ignored the sound of approaching footsteps. He was in shock and he didn't understand anything. Sebastian had _lost_. He was so injured… Was he dying? No… Of course not; he couldn't. Maybe it was all his imagination? Was it one of those visions again? Why was there so much blood? He was a demon, things weren't supposed to be like this, why was the wound so severe… Why wasn't the wound healing?

"Sebastian!" he finally managed to choke out, his voice sounding far more desperate and begging that he'd liked. He shook the demon's shoulder. "G-get up, get a grip on yourself! I told you to defeat him!"

Ciel couldn't hold him up any longer, the demon's body too heavy for him. Without the support, it slid to the ground, the demon no longer even conscious.

"Wake up! Sebastian, this is an order!" Ciel screamed, his tone a mix of rage and despair. "What kind of butler are you, how dare you do such a thing to me?!"

Ciel, finally silenced, was shocked, and refused to believe that the sight in front of him was real; his butler lay on his back on the ground, his blood coloring the snow red. Now he had a better look at the critical wound; it was simply awful, and horrifying, how much damage the blade did.

The second demon approached them, an undisturbed expression on his face as he looked at the scene right next to him.

"It was an anti-demon weapon," he said breaking the silence. His voice sounded as melodic and pleasant as before. "This is the reason why it caused so much damage. As opposite to normal weapons, it will not allow him to heal, for it affects the demon's ability to do so," he added calmly, as if reading Ciel's mind and knowing his questions.

Ciel stared at him, his gaze full of hatred and loathing. Before he could speak, though, the demon stopped him, placing a finger on his mouth. He then crouched down, so he was almost on Ciel's level.

The demon's expression changed slightly, to curiosity and something more, something Ciel found disturbing, and unexpectedly, he leaned towards to Ciel, their faces far too close to each other's.

"I understand everything now. Your smell is… so alluring," he whispered hungrily, a smile appearing on his face. He then caressed Ciel's cheek with his claw. "How beautiful," he commented huskily.

Ciel furiously slapped the demon's hand away. "When will his wound start healing?!" he demanded harshly, even though his panic was obvious. "How long are the effects going to last?!"

The demon looked at him, no guilt or any compassion visible on his face. "It won't just start healing on it's own. It's over. It's impossible for his body to heal on its own now," he answered simply.

Without giving Ciel a chance to react, he ripped the eyepatch off in one swift movement, letting it fall. He tilted his head to the side, staring at the violet mark embedded in Ciel's eye, his expression clearly reflecting his dislike for it.

"We will have to get rid of this mark later," the demon murmured. "But let's play a little game for now, shall we?" he asked gently, though his tone clearly suggested it was rhetorical.

"W-what do you mean?" murmured Ciel his voice shaking slightly. "What's going to happen to him then?!" he insisted, completely ignoring the demon's question. He appeared to be on the verge of having a panic attack. "Answer me!" he snapped, losing the last shreds of his patience.

The other demon picked up both knives from the ground. He then took Ciel's hand and placed the regular, albeit smaller, knife in the boy's palm, forcing his fingers to close around the knife's handle.

Ignoring the lost look on Ciel's face, he stroked his bluish grey hair. "I will leave that for you to figure out. We will meet once more soon, and I will play again, just for you," he promised. "You will make a glorious addition to my collection." He leaned down, his mouth close to Ciel's ear. "Blood is very precious," he added in a whisper, a hint of a smile on his lips.

The demon stood up, glancing at Ciel for another second, admiring the pale skin, stained with demon's blood, trembling, fragile palm holding the knife and wide open eyes, filled with sheer despair and terror. He then picked up his violin and started to walk away, the black haired girl following his every step.


	14. Chapter 13

_AU: Thank you for all your reviews, favs and alerts! Hope you will continue to read my story._

_Shattered Apocalypse, thank you for beta-reading! :)  
_

* * *

Ciel stared at Sebastian; his mismatched eyes seeing nothing but the grievous chest wound, blood covering the white shirt and staining the snow around him, dyeing it dark red. He was unaware of the tears in his eyes, and didn't even realize how badly his palms were shaking. Kneeling on the snow, he couldn't feel its coldness.

"You promised to help me with my revenge," he hissed, trying to sound angry, yet his voice sounded almost as if he was crying. "How dare you try to break our contract?!"

Deep down, he knew from the very start what he was supposed to do; he understood it the second the other demon whispered those words. _Blood is precious_. Sebastian's body couldn't heal on its own, but it could with a little help. Just like it was with Ciel's own body back when he had pneumonia.

Ciel quickly took off his coat. Without any hesitation, he roughly started to tear the bandage off his left wrist, and with his still trembling hand he brought the blade of the knife close to his skin, exactly where the stitches were. Taking a deep breath, he made a cut there, loudly gasping in pain. Sharp silver easily sliced the skin, and blood immediately appeared on its surface.

Ciel crawled closer to Sebastian, his small figure hovering over the demon, and brought his wrist to the demon's mouth. He could feel Sebastian's sharp protruding fangs slightly grazing his skin. Some of his blood trickled down the side of the demon's chin as he pressed his wrist more forcefully.

At first, nothing happened, and Ciel feared that he had been wrong. All his doubts, however, soon vanished when he suddenly heard the sound of his blood being swallowed. Before he had any chance to react, he was grabbed; hands violently gripping his buttocks, animal-like nails painfully clawing into them, almost ripping the material, forcefully pulling Ciel upwards. This action caused Ciel to completely lose his balance and he fell on top of the demon.

As he raised his head a little bit, he managed to notice that Sebastian's eyes were violet, fangs covered with blood. He still wasn't back to his usual form.

"Wha-" Ciel began weakly, but was soon cut off by Sebastian titling his head, forcefully exposing his throat and bending it closer to his face, in an almost painful manner. He then nuzzled into Ciel's neck, sniffing it, before his teeth sunk in, biting deep into the flesh.

The searing pain drew a moan from Ciel and he squirmed instinctively, trying to move away, but the demon didn't let him, one of his hands still on the boy's backside, the other now clutching his hair, making him wince and completely immobilizing him.

He could feel the demon's lips on his skin and so he could hear the sounds of his rushing blood being greedily swallowed, without any restraint. It made him feel dizzy. He closed his eyes, his breathing now quickened, the panic making him unable to move, paralyzing him completely.

His mind was still hazy so it took him a moment to register what was actually happening. Was he _really_ just bitten by Sebastian?

He didn't understand why, but the initial pain began to quickly fade away, making him feel a sudden rush of blessed numbness. He stopped struggling completely, his body going limp like a rag doll. He let it rest against the demon, his whole weight now on top of him. It was… so weird and confusing, this disturbing sensation… Why wasn't it as unpleasant as it should be? Why wasn't it as gross as it should be? Instead, it was actually beginning to feel good, the strange sense of anesthesia; all his worries disappearing in seconds. He didn't even feel cold anymore.

He didn't know how long it had been before he felt his neck being licked and caressed with warm, soft lips and a tongue. He sighed softly as he felt the familiar, comforting sensation of his hair being gently stroked and petted.

He passed out, but it seemed just like falling into a blissful sleep.

* * *

When Ciel regained consciousness, he was in his own bed, feeling heavenly warm and comfortable. Still, he also felt quite weak and faint, and his neck seemed a little sore for some reason. His eyes opened; slightly gazed and unfocused. He immediately noticed that it must have still been night, for it was quite dark and the curtains were still shut.

"Are you feeling alright, Master?" A well known voice made him look to the left. Ciel saw his butler, standing right next to his bed.

He looked… Normal. Like he always did. No claws, no fangs… No _wound_, no _blood_. He couldn't help but sigh with relief. It was like waking up from the worst nightmare. Everything was going to be alright now.

Not giving the boy a chance to answer, the demon helped him sit up and handed him a glass filled with water.

"Please, drink this, my Lord," he said, in a neutral voice. "I have also prepared some light snacks for you. Even though it's still nighttime, you should eat something in order to-"

"Mhm," Ciel interrupted him impatiently, staring at him. "I'm…" he hesitated a bit, before finishing. "Glad that it worked. I can't remember anything after I reopened that wound on my wrist, you know?" he mumbled, immediately glancing at his hand, now once again carefully bandaged. "I think I must have fainted immediately after," he added, his tone clearly suggesting that he was just stating a fact. It was true. He only remembered last night events up to that point, as if his memory had a some blanks.

Sebastian replied after a long moment, watching him intensely. "There is no need to worry, Master. There's no need to remember," he murmured, a barely audible hint of a chuckle in his voice.

Ciel took a few sips of water; his gaze now on the bed covers, avoiding Sebastian.

The demon kept observing him, effortlessly reading into the expression the boy tried to hide so hard, and obviously failing. Ciel was _disappointed_. It was obvious to him; Ciel was disappointed in his reaction to the night's events.

Ciel's eyes narrowed slightly; clearly he was growing more and more inpatient because of his butler's silence. He glanced at the nutritional, healthy looking snacks brought by Sebastian before letting his gaze turn to the demon, once again.

"Aren't you going to say anything?" he asked finally coldly. "I think you should at least-"

The demon interrupted him. "I thought it would be appropriate to ask my Master first," he said in a neutral tone of the voice. "Therefore, may I thank you, Master? For going to such lengths for his humble servant?" he asked in a polite, serious manner.

Ciel blinked, slight confusion now portrayed on his face when hearing the request. "You… may," he murmured finally, trying to cover up the puzzlement in his voice with fake confidence. He reached for one of the snacks but didn't start eating it.

Before he had the chance to do anything, Sebastian leaned down slightly and placed a kiss on the soft greyish blue hair which hind his master's forehead.

"Thank you for your kindness, Master," he said quietly, clearly in a mocking manner. "And forgive me for failing your expectations."

Ciel opened his mouth to say something a look of pure surprise and annoyance on his face, but he was once more interrupted.

"However," continued Sebastian. "Your action was completely unnecessary. My body would soon mend itself on its own, my Lord. Your blood simply quickened this process."

Ciel stared at him with disbelief written all over his face. "He said it was an anti-demon weapon and your body wouldn't stand a chance unless I-" he began to explain frantically.

Sebastian sighed, his eyes never leaving Ciel. "He _lied_ to you, Master. I thought you knew already… that I'm not going to die easily. It's true that the weapon he used was made specifically to weaken demons, but it certainly would not kill me. In a little time, I would be as good as new," he explained, a slight, satisfied smile on his face.

Ciel chuckled humorlessly. "It was such a waste then," he commented coldly.

Without another word, he put the snack away, back on the plate set on the nightstand. He then turned away and lay down again, his back now facing Sebastian.

"I'm tired," he said simply, his voice void of any emotions. "Don't wake me up too early," he added quietly.

* * *

It was dinnertime and Ciel was sitting in the dining room, his head lazily rested on the elbow placed on the table surface. In front of him was a plate of roasted turkey with dressing. It was also filled up to the brim with a variety of colorful, fresh vegetables.

"Why such a big portion?" complained Ciel whiningly. "I'm not going to eat this much."

Sebastian, standing close to his side, replied. "You have lost quite a lot of blood, Master. Therefore, you need food rich in nutritious-"

"Boring," interrupted him Ciel, uncaringly. He lifted his head up a little bit and stabbed a piece of carrot with a fork, observing it with disgust. "I'd rather eat something sweet. You know that I prefer sweet things," he said in a scolding tone.

"You can have your dessert if you eat _all_ of this," said Sebastian patiently, giving him a triumphal smirk.

"_I_ am going to decide when I have my dessert," argued Ciel, but put the fork in his mouth anyway, biting off some carrot. "Anyway," he continued, in a more serious tone, "now about the missing people case. He said…" Ciel hesitated for a second. "He said that he will come to see me again soon," he explained finally. "So I don't think there is a need to do anything right now."

Sebastian nodded, agreeing with him. "There is no need for you to be concerned over it," he assured the boy, in a confident tone. "What happened back then, when I got caught off my guard, won't happen again."

"It better not," murmured bitterly Ciel.

* * *

It was the middle of the night when Ciel woke up. At first, he didn't know what actually caused his awakening, until he heard the familiar melody. Rubbing his eyes slowly, he pulled away the covers, tilting his head to the side slightly, like a curious puppy. It was so… heavenly. So divine, so haunting, that he never wanted it to end.

Without thinking, he got up and left the bedroom, barefooted and wearing nothing but a nightshirt. He didn't know how long he'd been walking. It felt like a long time when he suddenly realized he was standing in the hallway, and that everything had gone quiet.

He gasped, completely startled when he felt something cold on his palm.

"So we meet again, beautiful." A well known, harmonious voice whispered into his ear.

Ciel blinked, slowly coming out of the dazed state, only half aware that the demon in front of him brought his palm to his mouth and placed a kiss on it, just like he did to that girl back then.

"Let go!" he suddenly protested in a choked voice, jerking his hand away. "Sebastian, come here, this is an order!" he shouted weakly, not understanding why his butler still didn't realize that he was in danger.

The demon roughly grabbed both his wrists, restraining him in a manner that reminded Ciel of the Asylum, and only caused him to struggle even more.

"Sebastian, I ordered you!" he yelled again, sheer desperation in his voice.

Why wasn't he coming? Did something happen, again? The mere thought of that almost made him hyperventilate.

"He won't. I made sure of that." The violinist smiled, seeing the pure terror appearing on the boy's face upon hearing those words. "There is no need to fight," he said in a calming, steady voice, firmly restricting the boy's movements. "Calm down, _Ciel_."

The way he said his name made Ciel hold his breath for a second, the sudden sense of dread overwhelming him. What was going to happen now? Why was he all alone again?

A humiliated, helpless child. That was what he felt like again. Even though he sold his very soul to never experience this again… The sense of being abandoned and the fear of being hurt were too much, he felt like he was going insane. His body seemed to be going numb, just like his mind. His struggles weren't as hectic anymore, his thoughts stopped being so chaotic. Just like… back then.

"There is something I need you to know first. Something that will make you even more perfect, before we can work on adding you to my collection," the demon continued to murmur into his ear. "Do you understand?"

One of his claws gently tore the bandage off Ciel's hand and began stroking the stitched skin on Ciel's left wrist, making him wince. The boy didn't reply to his words. He looked like he was going to be sick, his face pale as a sheet.

"Can you hear me, _Ciel_?" the demon kept talking to him, his voice sounding as if it was coming from the distance. "_Ciel_, look this way."

So… disturbingly familiar. Those words. Ciel listened to them carefully, trying to make sense of them.

No reaction. The demon seemed so pleased, seeing shock in mismatched eyes, even though the little prey didn't realize it was there yet.

"Look at me, _Ciel_, if you can understand what I am saying to you. Isn't it quieter here than in your room? Isn't it better?"

Those words made him gasp with terror, making him realize where he heard them for the first time, bringing back all the memories, making them flash in front of his eyes. Finally. All his struggles ceased as he found himself barely able to breathe, his heart frantically fluttering.

"Do you like it?" the demon whispered into his ear, at the same time putting pressure on the stitched wound with his claws, painfully, but not hard enough to break skin.

The mismatched pair of eyes looked completely glazed and unfocused, staring into an empty wall in front of them.

"No," a soft whimper escaped Ciel's lips.

How did he know? How did he know all those things?

"No?" repeated the demon in a gentle, caring voice. "Why not, _Ciel_? Can you tell me?"

Ciel squeezed his eyes shut, subconsciously biting his lip, completely distressed. Everything seemed to mix up. Memories. Reality. Words, voices, places; even the walls seemed to be dirty grayish, were where the pure white walls gone?

_"Can you hear me, Ciel?"_

_"Ciel, look this way."_

_"Look at me, Ciel, if you can understand what I am saying to you."_

_"Why did you refuse to eat, and then spat at the nurse again when she tried to feed you, Ciel__?"_

_"Oh my, aren't you a lovely creature, I could just eat you up… Did you sleep well, little kitten?" _

_"Do you like it?" _

_"Why is the little dollybird so eager to leave?"_

"Do you understand now?" a pleased, melodic voice broke through his memories, bringing him back to the real world again.

"Stop," Ciel whispered angrily, his mind still feeling hazy. "Stop messing with my head!" he yelled suddenly, his voice echoing in the hallway. "How do you even-" he began in a half-choked voice, but the demon interrupted him.

"I know everything," the demon told him calmly, a satisfied expression on his face. "Every single detail, and, of course, your biggest, most hidden secret," he murmured, observing the boy's reaction. "About your parents, and what happened that day. The truth you're trying so hard to find out, even though it's right in front of you. Or maybe trying to _hide_ is a better way to put it… _Ciel_?"

Ciel's eyes widened, his heart beating even faster. "You're lying," he said quickly. "You-"

The demon smiled at him, finally letting go of his wrists. He then reached out to stroke Ciel's cheek with his claw, before answering. "I am not lying. And I want you to find out the truth, little one," he promised. "It is essential, for both of us."

Ciel shook his head, a lost and confused look on his face. "I don't know what you are saying, I don't understand you at all! But if you know something, then tell me!" he demanded loudly, completely losing his patience.

There was a sudden, unidentified sound, and Ciel felt something warm splash on his face.

Red, red, red. Dark red everywhere. He could see long, black claws, protruding from the demon's chest, so close to him.

"Distraction is such an inconvenient thing, is it not?" A joyful, well-known voice spoke. "Especially on someone else's territory."

"Sebastian," whispered Ciel automatically, staring at his butler, an unreadable expression on his face.

"Excuse my delay, Master. I apologize."

Sebastian, drenched in blood, was standing right behind the other demon, his claws still deeply embedded in the other one's flesh.

"I admit, your little friends were a bit bothersome… It is my duty to inform you that bringing uninvited guests with you is improper etiquette," the demon said, his tone careless as he now spoke to the enemy.

The violinist let out a low, pained growl, struggling, all his efforts in vain.

"Master, I don't think it would be appropriate for you to witness his gruesome leaving. Therefore, I shall take this outside," said Sebastian, the smirk on his face revealing his inhumane, canine-like fangs.

Ciel, still in shock caused by the demon's earlier actions, mindlessly stared as his butler violently dragged the other being out.

Seconds later, he could hear the disturbing noises. Skin being cut and ripped apart, blood splashing on the ground, growls…

He didn't even notice when Sebastian returned, the butler's white vest even bloodier now, if that was possible.

"I disposed of him, Master," announced the demon, standing right in front of Ciel. His crimson eyes were observing the boy carefully. "Are you hurt?" he asked softly, more to comfort the boy than anything else since he couldn't see any injuries.

Ciel's mind was an absolute mess; he couldn't concentrate at all, all his thoughts mixed together. He didn't even feel it when Sebastian gripped his wrist gently, taking a look at the marks left by the violinist's claws, his eyes narrowing slightly.

"No… What about… those people?" he murmured finally.

"As to what happened to the victims…" Sebastian began, out of nowhere producing a bandage and wrapping it back around Ciel's wrist, where the stitched wound was. "Unfortunately, the process of… making them into dolls, which basically means strapping them of any free will and emotions, was completely permanent," he continued. "I do know their location but they will never be themselves again. I'm certain that the society will treat them as mentally ill."

A wince appeared on Ciel's face when he heard it. "Just… kill them all then. Painlessly. End it for them. That's my decision," he said quietly, yet firmly.

"Master, are you sure?" the demon questioned, his voice a bit hesitant.

"It's better for them. Better than… The Asylum." Ciel slowly nodded, his gaze still unfocused. "He wanted me to be one of the dolls, too, but he said I was not ready to become one yet. But he also…" the boy broke of, an anxious expression back on his face again. "Where is he?" he asked out of nowhere, looking around, as if expecting the violinist to be hiding somewhere.

"He won't bother us ever again, my Lord, I made sure of that," simply replied the demon. "You need more sleep, therefore-"

"You killed him?!" gasped Ciel, his voice full of disbelief, and surprisingly to Sebastian – anger.

Sebastian stared at the boy for a second, his head titling to the side a little bit, with curiosity. "Yes, Master. Last time you ordered me to defeat him, after making him talk about-" he began explaining.

"I didn't want you to kill him! I didn't want you to defeat him completely today, I still needed to talk to him!" Ciel screamed hysterically. His eyes were widened, face even paler than before. There was no doubt that he was greatly distressed.

Sebastian was looking at him, lack of understanding and slight concern reflected on his face. "_Talk_ to him?" Sebastian asked, unable to hide the confusion in his voice. "About what, Master? I told you that I found the information about all the victims and-"

Ciel didn't let him finish. "You don't understand anything! You've ruined everything! How dared you kill him without my consent?!" he yelled, his voice even louder than before.

The sound of footsteps was muffled by the boy's yells, and soon the three servants appearing in the hallway, all in their nightwear.

"Is everythin' alright?" One of the voices, sounding very sleepy, spoke. It was, however, completely ignored.

"You had never taken back that order, my Lord, so I assumed this was what you wanted," the demon tried to reason with Ciel. "Please, let me take you back to your bedroom, you seem very upset, and tomorrow-"

"He knew everything! He knew everything about me and about my parents' deaths and he was going to tell me!" shrieked Ciel, his voice now trembling slightly.

Ciel's eyes were filled with anger as they stared at Sebastian. The boy looked like he was almost ready to attack the servant.

Sebastian sighed. "You don't really believe that, do you my Lord? He was a master of mind manipulation. He just read your mind to find out about your memories. That's all there-"

Ciel didn't let him finish. "This wasn't for you to decide!"

Unable to control himself anymore, he furiously slapped Sebastian. A stuffed gasp could be heard from one of the servants as a red mark appeared on the demon's cheek almost immediately.

Sebastian, watching him completely expressionless, replied. "If this is how you see it, then I apologize, Master. It wasn't my intention to interfere with your choice," he said, voice lacking any regret.

Ciel completely lost all his control. He could feel the tears of anger and disappointment in his eyes, threatening to escape. At this moment, it didn't matter to him whether or not the second demon had been lying. The only thing he cared about was a chance at finally getting some information he was desperately seeking for, and Sebastian took it away from him.

"Did you do it on purpose?" Ciel hissed, sudden accusation in his voice and eyes. "Did you kill him because he was going to help me find out the truth, and it would then mean that our contract was void, because it was someone else that helped me?!" he shouted with pure fury.

"You aren't making any sense, Master. He lied to you, in reality, he had no idea-"

"Shut up!" Ciel closed his eyes for a moment, trying to compose himself. When he opened them again, his glaze focused on Sebastian, and he only felt the anger getting stronger. "I hate you," he whispered, voice full of loathing. "Leave this mansion. I can't even look at your face!" he demanded coldly, his eyes narrowed. "Do not _ever_ come back if you aren't called, no matter what. Do you understand?"

Sebastian stared at him for a moment, before answering. "As you wish, Master," he said uncaringly. He then turned around, heading towards the door.

Ciel let out a breath he didn't realize he had been holding, hearing the door being shut. He eyed the three servants standing in the entrance to the hallway, an emotionless look on his face.

"Y-Young Master, is-"

"You are all dismissed," he said quietly, not letting Finnian finish the sentence. "I don't want to see anyone for a while, so please stay out of my way," he added, not sparing them a second glance.

He heard them murmuring replies, all in depressed voices, as he made his way upstairs. He then went to the bathroom, closing the door behind him. Without thinking, he opened the tap and splashed some cold water on his face; it had been dyed red when he began cleansing away the demon's blood from his skin.

Sighing softly, he backed away a little bit, wanting to see if there were any traces of it left. He froze, completely still, pure terror in his eyes. Just like… _Déjà vu._

Such a familiar sight. The ruined blue outfit and a torn apron, all stained red. His right eye; bleeding, injured, crimson trickling from it down his face. Black and white stockings, their upper parts uncomfortably sticky with blood. The bruises and scratches; everywhere.


	15. Chapter 14

_AU: I'm really sorry, I know it took ages. Hopefully it won't happen again, though. As always, thank you very, very much for reviews, favs and follows._

_Thank you so much for beta-reading, Shattered Apocalypse!_

* * *

Ciel stared at his reflection, tears threatening to escape from his eyes. His thoughts were so chaotic and mixed up at the moment that he couldn't understand any of them. He just stood there; still, unmoving.

"I deserved it, after all." A soft, empty voice spoke; nothing more than a quiet whisper.

It sounded just like his own, but he couldn't remember himself speaking. He could feel his hands trembling. He had no idea what to do with himself.

"Killer." He suddenly heard a vicious hiss, sending a shiver down his spine.

He didn't even realize it when he clasped his hand over his mouth, muffling a shocked gasp.

It wasn't _him_, he didn't mean to. But it _was_.

Ciel was scared and angry - he couldn't think, he wanted _it_ to go away. Before he could stop himself, he grabbed the large white flower vase and threw it at the mirror, smashing the glass surface to a million pieces.

Some sharp particles scratched at his skin at the impact but he didn't even feel it. The distorted reflection of himself was staring at him now, in many shattered parts, appearing even more gruesome, mocking him, smiling in triumph.

He turned around, breaking into run, unable to stand it any longer. He was losing control again.

Down the stairs, through the long corridor, away from here. A flash of the light. A familiar sight, again. A reflection of himself, from both sides. Yes, there were two mirrors in the hallway weren't there?

The ripped sky blue outfit, ruined striped stockings with their upper uncomfortably sticky with blood. And blood, everywhere on him. Scratches. _Blood_.

It was real. He didn't imagine it.

He had to get rid of those cursed mirrors, all of them. He grabbed the first thing he saw, a porcelain doll figurine in a ball dress, been passed down onto the family since generations, and smashed both mirrors, escaping the reflections.

"Y-Young Master?!" He heard a shocked voice coming from one of the servants but he didn't even turn around.

He felt an even stronger rush of panic. He didn't want anyone to see him like this. It was disgraceful. He couldn't shame himself even further.

"Go away! Don't look at me!" he ordered in a choked tone.

"B-but Young Master, you-"

Without even grabbing his coat or boots, Ciel frantically ran to the door, escaping from the house, not even bothering to close them. He heard the servants call after him but he ignored it, sprinting as fast as he could, not caring where he was heading.

He quickly ran through the mansion's gardens, opening the gates in rush and leaving the land belonging to him. It was raining and it was very cold. The ground beneath his bare feet was wet and moody, making it easy to slip, but his cloudy mind didn't seem to care about it, blindly heading in an unknown direction, trying to find somewhere safe, away from here.

Ciel didn't understand how it happened, but he suddenly found himself surrounded by trees, and was now standing on the clammy, soft moss. His breathing was erratic, he felt exhausted from the running.

He frantically looked around, his eyes widened with fear. It was this place. He has been here before, he was sure of it. Where was the field of dead flowers and a ruined fountain with a broke angel statue? It surely must be somewhere.

It was so dark, the tall trees everywhere preventing light from coming in. Everywhere he turned, he could see the distorted shadows, following him threateningly with his every step, making his surrounding seem even more disturbing to him.

Something bad was going to happen soon, he knew it, just like he remembered. Someone was there to hurt him. Someone was going to set this place on fire, just like it happened in the visions. He had been seeking shelter, but he found himself in hell instead.

He had to find a way out, but he didn't know how. He didn't know which way to go, for everything looked the same to him, and he couldn't see any paths that could possibly lead him to an exit. He did the only thing he could think of – which was to blindly start running again, relying on his intuition only. He felt sharp tree branches scratch at his skin from time to time but he didn't pay them any mind. He was pretty sure that his feet were bleeding, but he couldn't even feel the pain.

Ciel heard a sudden rustle behind him. He was unable to suppress a gasp and he made the biggest mistake he could – he turned around for a brief second. The moment of distraction cost him greatly, and he should've never taken his eyes off the ground in front of him.

There was a sudden pain, and a moan came from his lips. He was falling over, onto the unpleasantly moist ground. He was so wrong, it seemed - there was nothing behind him, maybe it was just some animal hiding in the bushes. There was nothing threatening, but his leg was now-

God, the pain was awful, and he thrashed frantically, unintentionally causing himself even more of it. He looked down, seeing his left foot caught in a sharp steel jaw hold. A trap, used to catch wild animals.

He felt himself panic even more, his breaths coming out in short and irregular rasps; the verge of a panic attack. He knew it, he knew he was in danger and now, anytime now, he was going to be hurt. Unable to think logically, he thrashed even more, trying to get the thing off him using force, injuring his limb even more in the process. Warm blood appeared, trickling down his foot and disappearing in the ground.

Ciel was shaking all over, but he didn't know whether it was from the cold, anxiety or simply the mix of both. His hair was wet, sticking to his paler than usual face. The white nightshirt was completely soaked, too, for the rain never stopped. He didn't know how long he'd been struggling, the pain so much more intense now, the wound far more serious; ruined flesh, an awful bloody mess.

He suddenly stopped all his movements, his head quickly snapping to the right side. He could hear loud footsteps, audible even though the rain was still pouring down heavily. Terror and realization appeared on his face immediately.

The sound of heavy boots stomping heavily on the soft ground, mud crushing under their weight. Closer. _Closer_, approaching him threateningly. Ciel's efforts to escape suddenly returned, even more desperate and frantic. He anxiously tried to free his leg from the trap's clutch, injuring himself even further, just like a panicked wild animal would. He knew what was coming.

Everything became more chaotic as Ciel began to hear someone yelling something to him, at him. It startled him further, the voice sounding so intimidating and aggressive to him. He immediately looked in the direction where the voice was coming from, and a fearful noise, a whimper, escaped his lips.

There was a man approaching his shivering form, just a few steps away now. He was wearing dirty, shabby clothes and had brown messy hair, but those things weren't what made him so horrifying. It was the fact that his hands were covered in a red substance. And the _knives_. He could see a set of knives in the pocket of his coat and attached to one of the military looking heavy boots.

The male was saying something to him, but Ciel couldn't even comprehend his words. Not that he needed to anyway. They were vicious threats, dark promises of what was about to come. He was going to hurt him and Ciel knew that. The man was suddenly hovering over him, almost on top of him, and as he felt the man's hand on pressing on his thigh, Ciel felt nauseous and completely lost it. Before he knew it, he was suddenly screaming; his voice echoing and so loud that his throat hurt, inhuman, like an animal just caught by the predator. It was instinctive; he started flailing and blindly attacking the aggressor, kicking him with his other leg, his sharp nails clawing at his face and arms, anywhere he could reach. His foot was hurting so much now that he was almost howling from pain. He could feel more warm blood running down his skin.

"Stop moving!" the man yelled again, and this time, Ciel understood the words, which were almost shouted in his ear. "Are you mad?!"

The man was trying to hold him down now, harshly pinning his wrists to the cold, wet ground, almost dislocating them from using too much force.

"Get off me!" Ciel yelped, in a choked voice. "Don't touch me, _don't_!" a begging tone, stripped of the usual pride once again.

As he was trying to straddle Ciel's hips, Ciel managed to free one of his hands. A mismatched pair of eyes, panicky, as if they belonged to a wild animal, locked themselves on the man's form. He could clearly see the knives now, so _close_. He was going to be stabbed, or have his throat cut, or his wrists slashed opened after the man had his way with him. Ciel _knew_ it.

Without thinking, he reached out grabbing the only knife that was within his reach. Ciel's hand was shaking so badly that he almost immediately dropped it. Unfortunately, the man immediately noticed his action.

* * *

There were a few soft, black feathers on the ground, meters behind him, as if creating the path he had walked. His footsteps were absolutely soundless as he approached the chaotic scene. He didn't get too close, though, no, only close enough to have a good view of it. It was certainly going to be an interesting play, after all. He just got in time for the Final Act. A barely visible smirk appeared on his lips, as he stared at the sight in front of him.

He could see the porcelain doll; trapped, bleeding, terrified. Like a helpless animal caught in a trap; struggling to get away, hurting itself even further in the process. Literally.

The other human, the current cause of his prey's fear, the wolf in its eyes, was now leaning over it.

"Calm down, okay? It will be fine. Just stop moving, I'm going to get that trap off."

Sebastian was observing as the man got even closer to Ciel, and then touched the boy's thigh, possibly attempting to get his leg to still. As soon as he did this, there was a sudden terrified shriek. It was beautiful to him. Doll's fear, doll's pain… And voice, more pleasant to hear than any music piece.

He observed the man trying to restrain Ciel, who was now trying to fight him with all his might, aggressively lunging at him, kicking and scratching.

"Stop moving! Are you mad?!" He heard the man shouting again, the confusion and despair clearly in his voice, as he pinned Ciel's wrists to the ground.

And then the doll's screams again. Sebastian found it very difficult to resist the urge to purr. It was going to be wonderful.

"Get off me!" A yelp, so broken and filled with hopelessness, so _pathetic_. "Don't touch me, _don't_!"

Large, blue-violet eyes filled with so much despair and fear, just like _that_ time. Now, however, there was something more in them. Madness.

Sebastian watched as the male tried to straddle Ciel's hips, making the biggest mistake, as Ciel managed to free one of his hands. He then saw realization in Ciel's eyes, as he finally noticed that the weapon was within his reach. The boy then grabbed one of the sharp knives, determination winning over the confusion and anxiety. The man noticed this but it was already too late. Ciel, seeing his only chance to escape, plunged the blade deeply into his chest.

The male gasped, looking down at the knife protruding from his body and the crimson, quickly spreading over his coat. "Why… you…" he managed to whisper, unable to support his weight anymore and falling on top of Ciel.

Ciel sobbed but no tears escaped from his eyes. He weakly pushed the man off him. He could still hear his ragged breathing, as he now lay facing the ground beside him. Trying to ignore the disturbing noise, he attempted to calm down. He did it. He saved himself. He was safe now.

Clumsily, Ciel tried to sit up but his limbs just gave out, and he fell back onto the ground, his head resting on the wet moss and some old leaves. He felt completely drained of his energy, no strength left. All his muscles were sore and tired; his body still exhausted from the run, struggle and pain. Even now, his leg was still throbbing, the pain still awful but somehow more tolerable. It now felt a bit numb, probably from the shock.

Ciel slowly titled his head to the side a little bit, his left cheek touching the unpleasantly cold, clammy soil, getting dirty. He watched as the man beside him was, now almost inaudibly, grunting and choking, his figure shuddering. Ciel slowly closed his eyes, still unable to get his frantically beating heart to slow down.

The boy's form suddenly shivered and he frantically looked around. He could feel _something_. A sensation of something crawling on his skin slowly, in his hair, everywhere_. _A distressed noise escaped his lips as he stared at his own arms with a terrified expression. Bugs. All over him, even the blood-streaked black and white striped stockings were covered in them. He began to madly claw at his own arms and thighs next, unable to suppress whimpers of disgust and anxiety, as he tried to get the disgusting insects off him.

Ciel suddenly gasped, completely startled once again, when he suddenly felt a sharp pain in his leg again, followed by the blissful relief. His foot was free, the metal trap on the ground next to it. Looking up, his eyes wide with fear and delirium, he noticed Sebastian, crouching down next to him.

"You… but I told you to leave the mansion and…" Ciel immediately began to talk, his words barely coherent, slightly slurred. His face, however, immediately brightened, if only for a second. "Sebastian, he tried to hurt me, and then, they just, the bugs," he choked, suddenly changing the topic, unaware of how chaotic he sounded, not even realizing that he was still scratching at his skin.

The demon's hands immediately grasped his wrists, firmly but gently, effectively stopping his harmful actions. Ciel's right palm was slick with blood. It didn't belong to him though, for he didn't manage to cut the skin with his fingernails yet.

Sighing softly, Sebastian looked at the boy's face, fully aware of the fact that what he was about to say probably wouldn't be fully understood now anyway. "You told me to leave the mansion, Master. And right now, we're about three miles away from it, in a nearby small forest," he explained simply, observing the confused look on Ciel's face.

The boy just shook his head, his gaze completely unfocused, blindly staring ahead. "It happened again, I saw it in the mirror, it's not _me _and he attacked, he was going to kill me and he started touching me because he wanted to ra-"

Sebastian interrupted him, in a non-commanding tone of the voice, as if trying to coax him into listening to what he was about to say. "It's alright, Master. Let me take you back to the mansion now. There is no need to worry about him anymore, I will-"

"No," disagreed Ciel, not even looking at him, as he violently tried to free his wrists from the demon's clutch. "Get them off me!" he screamed suddenly, panic flashing in his mismatched eyes. "Those bugs, all over me!"

The demon watched him with curiosity, and something that could be seen as fascination. "There are no bugs on you, Master," he told him patiently. "There is nothing there," he added, and carefully held up Ciel's wrist in front of the boy's face, showing it to him, as if trying to prove that, indeed, there weren't any insects on the pale skin.

"You're wrong, get them off, I can feel them, they are all over me, crawling, and my skin-" Ciel immediately began to protest, his eyes now turned to the demon, filled with despair. He didn't know what made him look to the right but he did, and he finally saw that the man was still; no longer moving, silent.

Knowing it was pointless to argue with him, Sebastian just nodded before interrupting him. "A bath is in order, then. You are a mess and it will certainly help you feel better, Master," said Sebastian, and without giving him a chance to protest, he effortlessly picked Ciel up, intending to get him back to the mansion as soon as possible.

The demon started walking away from the nightmarish place, right back on the path Ciel couldn't find before. Ciel, however, didn't seem to mind at all, all his protests ceasing. The demon's words seemed to calm him down a bit, for he silently allowed Sebastian's action and, without thinking, he clung to the demon, nuzzling his face into his neck. He was still shivering but now it was mostly from the cold, the wet nightshirt sticking to his skin. He felt safe now, having the demon carry him, away from the blood stained ground, away from the _corpse_.

"In the mirror, I saw it again, and I deserved it, he said that but I thought…" Ciel was now whispering, his voice barely recognizable, and probably too hectic for most to understand. He didn't even know that his words weren't making any sense. "But it wasn't, I thought that was me but no and, he's someone else and I don't know what-" he cut off abruptly again.

There was a sudden realization on his face, though the demon couldn't see it now, the boy's face still hiding in his neck.

"W-what's wrong with me?" Ciel asked, his voice sounding far more unsteady, frantic. "Why did I… Why did I even come here?" he kept mumbling to himself. "I just want to go home… Take me home, now!" he demanded, his voice now a lot louder.

Ciel moved his head a little bit, opening eyes that had been tight shut for a while now. He slowly took a look around, as if he was seeing this place for the first time. Somehow… it looked different now. The trees; they weren't as tall as he was working himself up to believe minutes ago. The colors, the moss, the leaves, it all looked a bit less dark, a bit brighter. The shadows… were gone now. Only one thing looked exactly the same: vibrant red blood on the ground.

"Yes, Master."

* * *

The bathtub was filled with blissfully warm water, making him a bit too relaxed and very drowsy, the tiredness now revealing itself, now that he'd calmed down. The sensation of bugs crawling all over his skin was now gone, as Sebastian had just finished washing his hair; droplets of water still dripping from greyish-blue strands. Ciel's knees were curled up against his chest, his eyes blindly staring ahead. He could feel the gentle hands, and a soft cloth on him, cleaning away the dirt and blood from his body, making him pure again.

Sebastian, with an unidentified expression on his face, grabbed Ciel's palms, still smeared with red, now partially dried, liquid.

"Hands that shed innocent blood…" he murmured darkly. "How truly wonderful, my Lord," he added with a soft, pleased chuckle, before bringing the boy's bloodied palms to his mouth, placing a kiss on them. Ciel didn't comment on those words, as if he didn't hear them at all. Or perhaps he just didn't acknowledge them.

Ciel, still dazed and semi-conscious, slowly blinked, before staring at his palms and finally shifting his confused, trusting gaze to Sebastian. "That man…" he murmured suddenly, his voice quiet and still only half-coherent. "He wanted to hurt me. He was touching me and he tried to ra-" he cut off, sighing and suddenly turning his attention elsewhere, observing the cascades of water. It didn't matter, that was what he told himself. Everything was fine.

"He was a hunter," the butler said simply, as if offering the real explanation of what happened. "The traps, he set them up to catch wild animals."

Ciel just shook his head, uncaring, refusing to accept it. Without another word, he was pulled from the tub, wrapped in a soft blue towel and carefully dried. All his injuries were treated; the deeper cuts bandaged, along with the hurt leg.

He didn't even feel the white nightgown being tugged over his head, didn't notice when he was picked up and carried to the bedroom.

The other servants, Mey-Rin, Finian and Bard, unseen by Ciel, were silently observing the butler making his way to the other room with Ciel in his arms, their expressions a little bit miserable but relieved at the same time.

Ciel let a loud sigh when he was placed on the bed, his eyes, which seemed blank and unfocused, blindly stared at the butler, who was still leaning over him, adjusting the pillow, trying to make him more comfortable and covering his body with a quilt.

"The rabbit, I need-" began Ciel, his voice completely monotone and barely audible. Before he had a chance to finish, the plush toy was passed to him. Ciel blinked slowly, and clutched the rabbit in his hand, before pressing it to his chest.

"Goodnight, Master."

* * *

A loud crash, glass shattering everywhere and voices. In a matter of seconds, the peaceful night ended and chaos took its place. Ciel's eyes suddenly opened, and he quickly sat up, completely startled by the sudden commotion, his heart pounding frantically. He could hear footsteps; people running, yelling. Someone got into _his_ mansion.

Ciel quickly pulled away the covers, getting himself out of bed and on his feet. A loud hiss immediately escaped his lips, as the injured foot touched the ground. He ignored the pain, stumbling towards the door.

"Sebastian?!" he shouted, his voice echoing, as he finally found himself in the corridor. "What's happening-" his words were cut off, as he was grabbed by the back of his neck and shoved to the floor, hard.

He then felt something cold being pressed to his throat, a disturbing pressure, threatening to break the skin. Before anything could happen, Ciel heard a yell, and he was suddenly released. His butler, who just got the attacker off him, effortlessly helped him get back on his feet again.

"We have unexpected guests, Young Master, as you just had a chance to find out," announced the demon, his voice carefree. "I truly believe that you've been wanting to meet them for a while now."


	16. Chapter 15

_AU: Thanks for all the reviews!  
_

_Shattered Apocalypse, many thanks for beta-reading, you're such a doll! ;)_

* * *

Ciel stared at the demon, confusion and disbelief evident in his gaze.

_"Contact Angelina Durless and the Midfords."_

_"They are all dead. All of them had their throats slit. The whole Midfords family."_

A sudden realization appeared in his eyes, before they narrowed dangerously.

"_Had their throats slit…"_

He remembered the pressure of a cold, metal blade, pressed to his neck just seconds ago.

"You can't mean that-" Ciel cut off abruptly, seeing Sebastian's smirk. Ciel just shook his head slightly, a dry chuckle escaping his lips. "Get them all, I want every last one of them in the hallway _now_. Do not kill them. Get the servants busy so they stay away, just send them to the gardens so they won't hear anything," Ciel ordered, his tone cold, yet a hint of excitement evident in it.

"As you wish, Master," replied Sebastian, his head bowing slightly.

Leaving Sebastian to it, Ciel dashed off in the opposite direction, back to the bedroom. With no hesitation, he opened one of the wooden white drawers and took a gun out of it.

As he made his way back, his mind was filled with confusion. Everything happened so suddenly that he had trouble comprehending it. Was it _them_? Were they really the ones? Right now, so quickly, so effortlessly; it's not like he found _them_, after all, they found _him_.

Closing his eyes for a brief moment, he took a deep breath before stepping into the hallway. He was immediately greeted by the expected, nevertheless still satisfying view of the enemies tied up on the floor. There were seven of them in total. Next to them stood Sebastian, his butler's uniform appearing as perfect as always, no marks of a fight or a struggle, his face as calm as ever, no signs of tiredness.

Ciel stood in front of men, feeling all eyes on him, including a pair of crimson ones. "Which one of you is in charge of all this?" he asked, his tone emotionless, and somehow distant.

Two of the men stared at the one in the middle, which was enough of a hint for Ciel. Nevertheless, he looked at Sebastian, as if to confirm. The demon just nodded. Ciel approached the assumed leader. He looked down, observing him, his eyes narrowing slightly.

"Talk," he ordered firmly. "Why are you after me? Why were you after my family?" His palm, holding a gun, twitched a little. "Why did you _kill_ them?"

The man chuckled, but it was obvious that his confidence was lacking. "As if I'd let a brat order me around," he replied sharply.

"You _will_. It's not a matter of your choice, I can promise you that," said Ciel, with a sly, fake smile. "Let me warn you, though. _Brats_ can be very impatient."

He then turned around, standing right in front of the other attacker, pointing the gun at him. For a second, he seemed a bit hesitant, his eyes slightly unfocused again. His thoughts went back to _that_ day again. The Fire. His house. His parents. The Midfords.

"_Their throats slit."_

He blinked, trying to get rid of the thoughts. The whole situation didn't seem real to him. It felt as if he was in a dream, and he couldn't figure out if everything around him was actually happening… His mind just felt numb. Uninvolved. As if all of this concerned neither him, nor his life.

His finger, now on the trigger, was still for a few long seconds, before finally, with no further hesitation, Ciel pulled it. At first he didn't even realize what happened, blindly staring at the splash of blood on the opposite wall. There was a 'thump', a sound that seemed unnaturally loud in the silent room, as the man's body fell to the floor, and the pool of fresh, bright blood from the hole in his head quickly stained the ground, and his brain matter scattered around. The red liquid, growing steadily, quite quickly reached the tips of Ciel's shoes, sullying them.

Ciel turned around, daringly staring back at the leader of the group, as if trying to say 'Who is the kid now?' In a matter of seconds his wrist shifted slightly, the gun now aimed at another gang member. The sound of a shot echoed in the room once again, some red fluid getting on his face this time.

"Oh?" Ciel murmured, as if surprised, bringing his fingers to his mouth, unintentionally smearing the blood. He then looked at them, scowling slightly. "Disgusting," he whispered, before chuckling. He turned around, still looking amused, as he stared at Sebastian, standing nearby. "It's so dirty. His blood. Do something about it," he ordered.

The demon approached him, holding a silky white handkerchief in his hand. He gently wiped away the blood from Ciel's face first, then off his fingers.

Sighing, as if bored, Ciel looked back at the leader, his eyes narrowing slightly. He took a step closer to him, cocking his head to the side a little, observing the man.

"Talk?" he spoke again, his tone posing an order rather than a question.

"Stupid kid. I know I'm as good as dead already, so you can forget about it," the leader replied uncaringly, not even looking in the boy's direction.

Ciel let out a noise that sounded strangely like a growl, before he violently struck the man in the face with the butt of his gun; the man's head snapped to the side from the force of it. A thin trail of red liquid started trickling down the leader's mouth.

A few seconds later, before anyone even realized what had happened, the man whispered something barely audible, and Ciel pointed the gun to the man's leg. The echo of a shot and a yell of pain disturbed the silence, as the man's thigh started bleeding profusely. The next shot, in the opposite limb, brought about more grunts of pain, and blood freely flowed to the ground.

"Talk!" Ciel raised his voice, fury now evident in his eyes. "Talk, I said!" he screamed.

When nothing but more pained noises answered him, Ciel tossed the gun away, far from the reach of the men. "I will make you talk! Why did you do this to them?! Talk, you son of a bitch: my parents, my family, why did you RUIN them?!" Ciel's voice got more frantic and angry.

After getting no response, Ciel turned around, towards Sebastian, with a wild, somehow panicked look in his eyes. He bit his lip, staring at Sebastian's face, unsure, as if trying to ask, "What do I do now?"

Sebastian gently took his hand, his fingers teasingly brushing against it for longer than necessary. With a slight chuckle, he left a large, sharp looking blade in the boy's palm. "If I may suggest, referring to Exodus… An eye for an eye, my Lord," he said, clearly amused.

Ciel stared at the weapon in his hand; it reflected the light, and for some twisted reason he thought that was the right sign.

_He watched as the Cat sighed, licking his paw and scratching his pointy ear. "If you follow the guidance from the first message, you will find out, one day. There is another message. Listen carefully. At the bottom of the pond there is an item, which you need to obtain."_

"Is this… the right item…" he murmured incoherently, just to himself, his voice far too quiet to be heard by anyone else, apart from the demon.

The look in his eyes seemed to change slightly, somehow they became more unfocused. He stared back at the leader of the gang again, and approached him. Something just seemed… different. As he looked down, he saw the familiar image of the ripped, bloody, black and white stockings, and… Was he not wearing a nightgown before all this…?

"Why?" he asked, slightly louder now, a warning evident in his tone.

"Go… to hell," the man responded, his voice raspy and filled with pain.

Ciel laughed hysterically. "Trust me, I _will_," he murmured.

Gripping the weapon more tightly, he slashed at the man's visage, the blade cutting deep into the tissue, making the blood _spray_. And his eye… was it even there anymore, after he'd plunged the knife into it? Oh, how he ruined it… Again, again, and again… Why was his face so wet? Something warm was dripping from it, and he was obviously not crying because he felt _nothing_, and it was all so red… Oh, just blood, not his own, of course, so that made it all okay, it was just that someone else's… He couldn't hear the noises, he completely lost it.

He couldn't remember closing his eyes. All he knew was that he just opened them, and it felt as if he had woken up from a dream. There was a sound; something falling to the floor, metallic, strangely familiar.

"Do… you understand… only Durless and… Midfords… it was a chance for us… didn't want them continuing with the Funtom company… and you were supposed to die tonight… because you've resumed the company… so competition…" A voice, interrupted by coughing, choked with difficulty. It sounded as if it was coming from nearby.

Blinking, Ciel blankly eyed the mess that was made of the man's face in front of him. He cringed instinctively, more so when he stared at his own palm, painted crimson. None of that mattered now, though. The only important thing was the confession. His thoughts were so chaotic now, he couldn't comprehend them. It was all too much. It was too much to handle in one night.

"You are lying," he muttered softly, clearly in denial. "My parents, you killed them."

"No, no, it's… the truth, just… please…"

He felt like he couldn't breathe. Was it disappointment? Or rage? Both?

"Sebastian, make him talk, I don't care now," he whispered, at the verge of hyperventilating. "I... need some fresh air, I feel sick," he added, almost running out of the hallway into the mansion's gardens.

It was difficult to think. The whole situation was too confusing; he obtained something and then it was taken away from him. He closed his eyes for a brief moment, giving up and sitting on the grass. Nothing made sense. Before all this, everything fit the picture perfectly. He assumed that the same people killed his whole family, but if the man was telling the truth, his assumption was completely false, leaving him clueless once again. Of course they also deserved to be punished for killing the Midfords and Angelina Durless but still… it wasn't the same…

He had no idea how long he'd been sitting there, completely caught up in his thoughts, when the familiar voice interrupted him.

"Master, I have finished the… interrogation," Sebastian announced. "He was not lying. They did not kill your parents, there was no involvement in that on their side."

For a mere second, anger and disappointment appeared on Ciel's face, before it became emotionless once again. "You knew," he accused, his voice empty. "And-"

"You have never asked, Master."

"You manipulated me and led me into thinking that-" he cut off abruptly. "Stupid devil… Doesn't matter…" Ciel murmured. "Kill the rest of them… _painfully_. I want their blood on my floor. And on the walls, make it so the hallway turns _red_."

"As you-"

He didn't let the demon finish the sentence.

"And clean it up afterwards, I want no remains of their disgusting bodies, do you understand? Lick it all clean if you have to, like the dog you are."

* * *

"_You will never get out of here. You are completely insane, like the rest of them, little dollybird."_

He blankly stared at his reflection. _It_ wouldn't leave. _It_ wasn't him. The ripped dirty clothes, the ruined outfit… The _eyes_.

"Go away," he whispered, before he could stop himself.

" I _can't_." He heard a chuckle in response, his own voice, even though he didn't intend on using it. He could see it all too clearly, his distorted reflection talking to him, dressed in the ripped, blood-covered outfit, bruised, hurt, _damaged_.

"He won't protect you," added the vicious whisper. The mirror image of himself started tearing off the bandages, which were still wrapped around his wrist. "From the…"

"Shut up…" He closed his eyes, unable to stand watching it any longer. He could feel it all though, as if it was happening to him. Perhaps… it was.

"Most frightful thing…" the voice, his own, _stolen_, kept talking; it was now much angrier, and devastated at the same time.

"Shut up!"

"… _yourself_."

With the last word, he felt sudden pain, and heard the sound of something wet dripping to the bathroom floor. His nails, though they now strangely felt like talons, deeply scratched into his still unhealed wound, clawing into it, reopening it, as blood began to freely run. Again, and _again_.

It's all because of the Asylum. They made him go… mad.

"Sebastian," he murmured quietly, his voice shaking slightly, as he kept staring in the mirror. "Make it stop," he added quietly.

It couldn't have been more than a few seconds, before he heard the sound of the door being opened. Suddenly there was a hand, gently yet firmly covering his eyes, hiding away the distorted reflection from him.

He felt immediate relief upon seeing the darkness. He finally let out the breath he didn't know he'd been holding, subconsciously leaning into the body right behind him.

"Was that… my Other Self?" Ciel murmured, a hint of pain on his face, as the butler began to tend to his injury. His eyes were still covered; he didn't know how Sebastian was managing to dress the wound with only one hand, but he couldn't care in the slightest.

"If you wish to call it that," the demon simply answered.

"He's a liar… He said you wouldn't protect me from myself," Ciel said quietly. But you-"

Sebastian interrupted him. "Of course, Master. As long as you want me to," he said with no hesitation.

"Can you tell me something more about… _it…_?" the boy asked, biting his lip slightly, trying not to wince from pain. "No, I order you to…"

"I can, if you let me," Sebastian started, his tone as emotionless as always.

Not thinking twice about it, Ciel muttered a quiet "mhm", not moving, getting more nervous with every second. The hand covering his eyes was taken away; the light in the bathroom, suddenly too bright, caused his eyelids instinctively to shut, hiding everything from him once again.

"Don't close them," the demon ordered, and having no choice, Ciel obeyed.

His reflection was in front of him again, but now it was… normal. No ruined outfits, bruises… He sighed with relief, his erratic breathing finally calming down a little bit.

"Master, do you know that mirrors are said to have the power to confiscate part of the user's soul?" the demon suddenly asked.

Ciel didn't say anything, simply shaking his head 'no'.

"Some believe that if the user's reflected image appears distorted in any way, this could mean a corruption of their soul," Sebastian continued.

Without any warning, he placed his hands on Ciel's shoulders, turning him around so the boy was facing him, not the mirror. Crimson eyes stared in the mismatched irises intensely, as if trying to read them. Ciel couldn't get rid of the weird feeling that they seemed to pierce right through him, reading his mind effortlessly, reading his _soul_.

"Is my soul… corrupted then?" asked Ciel, his voice strangely numb. "Is that why…?"

"Corruption does not necessarily mean degradation, as you probably think, Master," the demon answered vaguely, as if not wanting to give a clear answer on purpose. "It may also mean… changed in a way, altered from its original, primary form, for various reasons, such as inability to cope and heavy trauma."

"So, the distorted reflection… is just a result of something, something that changed, corrupted my soul, not the cause itself, not the cause of my… Other Self… is that what you mean? It's just an effect but, but the origin of it is elsewhere?" Ciel asked, now numbly staring at the floor.

The demon nodded. "More or less," Sebastian said shortly. "It's all in your mind."

"This is so stupid…" Ciel sighed. "How do I get rid of it? You do know now, don't you? After… staring at my soul?" he asked, though it sounded more like an order.

For a moment, Ciel could swear that he saw a hint of amusement on his butler's face, but it disappeared quickly.

"Yes, my Lord," Sebastian replied, gently letting go of Ciel's fully bandaged wrist. "I do know it all now. What you need to do is to get your memories back, your memories from the day of your parents' death," he said, observing Ciel. "It will not go away until you do. In fact, it will just keep getting worse."

Ciel stood up, not looking at the demon. "I will get them back then, I refuse to be a victim, even to myself," he said sharply.

Sebastian stared at him as he was leaving the bathroom.

_False hope is truly best in bringing out despair._

He just couldn't wait to see the doll's most tragic fall down.


End file.
